WWF Saturday Night's Main Event IV (Version II)

Original Airdate: January 4, 1986

From Tampa, Florida; Your Hosts are Vince McMahon and Jesse Ventura

Hulk Hogan is (wave) pool side with Gene Okerlund, and blending up a nice 'protein shake' to prepare for his title defense against Terry Funk later on. Gene Okerlund takes a sip, and nearly has either an orgasm or a seizure. Whichever is less disturbing

Also at the water park, Roddy Piper and Jesse Ventura get happy endings from a bevy of beautiful women, while Hillbilly Jim, Cousin Luke, and Uncle Elmer float in the lazy river (while still wearing their clothing). Man, talk about glamorizing the heels to the kids. Though, why Piper and Ventura feel they need to avidly watch a trio of hillbillies laze about (with binoculars, no less!) instead of paying attention to the attractive women is never fully explored

Six-Man Tag Team Match: Roddy Piper, Bob Orton, and Jesse Ventura v Hillbilly Jim, Uncle Elmer, and Cousin Luke: Bobby Heenan joins McMahon for commentary on this one, while Jesse takes care of business in the ring. You know what's always bothered me? Why are all the spare hillbillies (Uncle Elmer, Cousin Luke, Cousin Junior) named based on their relationship, but Hillbilly Jim isn't named 'Cousin Jim' or 'Nephew Jim?' Weird rope configuration tonight, as it's blue/white/red top to bottom, as opposed to the usual red/white/blue. The mat is also much darker than the normal WWF style ones, and the ring is shorter than usual, which along with the ropes and multi-colored posts, gives us a very early 90s WCW vibe here. Ventura starts with Elmer, and rakes the eyes during the initial lockup, but gets tossed around, and Hillbilly tags in. Jim grabs a standing side-headlock, but runs into a knee, and Piper tags. He unloads rights, so Luke tags in, and Piper offers up a handshake. Luke's wise to him, but stupidly tries instigating a slugfest, and gets destroyed. Over to Orton for some abuse with his cast covered arm, and the heels cut the ring in half on Luke. Elmer gets the tag, and wins his own slugfest with Piper by grabbing a bearhug, and a six-way brawl breaks out. The hicks clean house (first time for everything, I guess), and the dust settles on Piper and Jim. Piper controls with a series of headbutts, but Jim no-sells him, so the heels gang up in the corner. Jim manages to get the tag off to Luke, and he's an outhouse of fire, but gets caught in a Sleeper by Piper at 8:00. This was shit, but it was perfectly fine for that era, when there was a lot less focus on match quality than characters. DUD (Original rating: DUD)

Back at the water park, Jimmy Hart races Junkyard Dog on the waterslides and gets destroyed, as Terry Funk promises to beat Hogan for the title tonight, and get the cover of Sports Illustrated

WWF Title Match: Hulk Hogan v Terry Funk: Hogan has Junkyard Dog in his corner to make sure Jimmy Hart doesn't get involved. Well, he did beat him on the waterslides, after all. I'd say that qualifies him. Weird light blue/red color combination for the Hulkster here. Between that and the ring, you can see that they're still really working on getting the hang of the TV production era, with nothing yet streamlined. Cool opening sequence, as they work a triple reversal during a cross corner whip, and Hogan knocks him to the outside with a clothesline. The crowd is just super into the Hulkster here - a simple turn of his head drawing massive cheers. Back in, Funk tries chopping him, but ends up going out again - over the top off of another clothesline. Back in, a criss cross ends in Terry bailing to the floor when Hogan steamrolls him, and a cross corner whip nearly sends him out yet again, but this time Hulk pulls him back with a side suplex for two. Terry fires off a headbutt and a mulekick to slow the champion down, and Terry goes up, but Hulk shakes the ropes to crotch him. Hogan adds an atomic drop, and a clothesline sets up an elbowdrop, so Hart trips him up. That gets both Hogan and the JYD on his tail, so Jimmy hides out underneath the ring - allowing Funk to unroll his wrist tape, and choke Hulk with it was he comes back in. Piledriver looks to finish, but only gets two. Wow, not even a Hulk Up there, I'm surprised! Terry keeps hammering him, but Hulk starts no-selling, and hits a backelbow out of the ropes. Big boot knocks Funk to the apron, so Hulk goes to suplex him back in, but that allows Jimmy to whack Hogan with the branding iron for two. Funk thinks it was three, however, and Hogan is able to blast him with a lariat while he argues with the official - retaining at 8:30. This wasn't a great match, but it was entertaining as hell, with Funk bumping around like a madman, and Hogan's act totally connecting with the crowd. As much as any other single match, this match is a great example of why Hogan was such an effective top babyface for as long as he was - he had the crowd in the palm of his hands the entire time, and knew exactly what to do with them. ** (Original rating: DUD)

Over at the water park, George Steele also wants to ride the waterslides but he's too scared, so he settles for the kid sized one, and brings his rubber ducky along with him for safety. Meanwhile, Randy Savage teaches Elizabeth how to swim by throwing her into the deep end

Randy Savage v George Steele: While Savage is busy yelling at some fan, Steele makes advances on Elizabeth before the bell, and that does not sit well with the Macho Man once he notices. Of note, a pre-fame Dean Malenko is the referee for this one. Kind of weird to think that it would take him a full ten years after this before he found success in the big two. Steele chases him out of the ring, and bites him once he's in. Savage takes an over the top bump to the outside, but Steele gets distracted by Elizabeth, and as a result, loses the high ground. Savage clobbers him on the way back in, but walks into a bodyslam - only for George to get busy with the turnbuckle pad rather than finish him. That (and another timely distraction from Liz) allow Macho to finish with a flying axehandle at 4:06. These two wrestled roughly a million times in 1986, and despite being their first meeting, this was about on par with every other match they had. I'd have preferred Savage wrestled the referee, frankly. ¼* (Original rating: ¼*)

Music video highlighting the best of 1985, set to Billy Ocean's 'When the Going Gets Tough, the Tough Get Going.' All kidding aside, 1985 was a helluva year for the promotion, and one well worth highlighting

Back at the water park, Corporal Kirchner demonstrates his aquatic fighting skills for Jesse Ventura

Peace Match: Corporal Kirchner v Nikolai Volkoff: The idea here is that they'll have a peaceful scientific style matchup. Dean Malenko acts as the referee again here. Handshake to start, and the initial lockup ends up in the ropes, but both guys give a clean break. Second lockup is in the ropes again for another clean break, and a third ends in Volkoff taking him down, but Kirchner countering into an armbar. Volkoff wrestles up, so Kirchner switches to a side-headlock, but Nikolai counters into an overhead wristlock - all clean thus far. Kirchner reverses the wristlock, but Volkoff's in the ropes for a clean break. Nikolai takes him down again, and tries a bodyslam, but Kirchner counters into a rollup for one, then grabs another headlock - into the ropes for a clean break. Another handshake into another lockup, and Kirchner goes back to the side-headlock, then into a standing hammerlock, but Volkoff escapes, and shoulderblocks him down. Criss cross ends in Kirchner getting the hammerlock back on, and an inside cradle is worth two. Lockup goes into the ropes again, but this time Nikolai takes a cheap shot at the break, and then drops him throat first across the top rope to setup a kneedrop for the pin at 4:32. Hmm, I kinda thought that was building to some outside interference from Iron Sheik or Freddie Blassie, but I guess that works, too. The match was fine for what it was, though more about getting the angle over than anything else. * (Original rating: -* ½)

Over at the wave pool, Don Muraco gets mobbed by a bunch of girls

Ricky Steamboat and Junkyard Dog v Don Muraco and Mr. Fuji: Muraco and Fuji attack before the bell (never has 'a Pearl Harbor job' been more fitting... where's Gorilla when you need him?!), and dump Steamboat to the outside so they can work over JYD. They go right to cutting the ring in half, but Fuji can't hold up his end of it, and Dog unloads. Muraco tags back in to try and salvage things, but gets bodyslammed, and cracked with a headbutt. They manage to turn things around again, but Muraco misses a charge in the corner, and Steamboat finally gets the tag. He's a dojo of fire, and Muraco eats the flying bodypress, but Fuji saves. He fails to follow-up, however, and Dog gets the tag - pinning Fuji with a headbutt at 5:19. This was pretty dull stuff, and would have really benefitted from having Steamboat take the heat segment, instead of Junkyard. DUD (Original rating: ¼*)

BUExperience: Between the Hogan/Funk title match (which I appreciated a lot more this time around) and the pool party theme, this was a fun episode – even if the rest of the matches were nothing notable