WWF Superstars (June 26, 1993)

Original Airdate: June 26, 1993 (taped May 24)

From Halifax, Nova Scotia, Canada; Your Hosts are Vince McMahon, Randy Savage, and Jerry Lawler

Tito Santana v Mr. Hughes: Lawler straight up called Tito a ‘wet back,’ and accuses him of smuggling people over the border. And the others just play it off like ‘oh, that’s not very nice, Jerry.’ And, remember, this is mainstream TV, not some indy running on a local channel in some small town somewhere. I know it was thirty years ago, but sometimes I forget just how different a time the 90s was. Hughes dominates early, and delivers a big boot for two, but misses a straddling ropechoke. That allows Tito a comeback, but Hughes kicks out of the jumping forearm at two. Flying bodypress, but Hughes rolls through for the pin at 3:11. Nothing to this one. DUD

Gorilla Monsoon is in the studio with an update on the tag title situation. Since last week, the Steiner Brothers have become two time champions, trading the belts with Money Inc throughout the week. And we get a promo from the Steiners, who… don’t sound particularly into it. It should have been obvious right then that their relationship with the promotion wouldn’t be a long lasting thing

Doink the Clown v Scott Dane: Vince notes that Doink ‘owes a debt to society,’ which I’m pretty sure is not how the legal system actually works. He’s also really, really worked up about Doink dressing up in a ‘ridiculous outfit,’ instead of just coming out to the ring and wrestling, since he’s obviously talented. Has this guy been watching this promotion, like, at all? Doink with the stump puller at a brisk 0:50. DUD

WWF Champion Yokozuna and Mr. Fuji hype the (non-televised) Stars and Stripes Challenge. That version of the title belt was beat to all hell (Randy Savage and Bret Hart were not the kindest to their belts over the years), but it’s relic like condition actually adds to it’s beauty. Though the shiny new version that replaced it around SummerSlam was welcome

Crush promises to slam Yokozuna on July 4. You can’t even handle a clown, chill, brah

The Headshrinkers v Mike Davis and Buddy Lenny: Vince promises that there will be headlines ‘around the world’ if an American can manage to slam Yokozuna. ‘Around the world,’ really? Talk about delusions of grandeur. And, yeah, I make fun of it all enough, but the concept of the Challenge was actually really good stuff, especially since the biggest superhero in the promotion’s history had just failed to do it (and had basically been run out of the territory by Yokozuna), so it makes sense that the guy that slams him should became an instant huge star. And in a different era, Lex Luger probably would have, but fans in 1993 wanted something different, and it was the wrong angle (and with the wrong guy, if we’re being honest). Fatu with a flying splash at 2:09. DUD

Gene Okerlund is in the studio with Face to Face, with guest Lex Luger. He’s still in full arrogant heel mode at this point, mere days away from his abrupt babyface turn. Not even a hint of it at this point

Razor Ramon v 1-2-3 Kid: From Monday Night RAW, June 21 in Poughkeepsie New York. Razor's got the $10,000 he's offering the Kid for this match in a sack, set on the apron like Damian. Kid is less than eager to jump in, and stalls, but catches an incoming Razor with a turnbuckle smash, and a flying sunset flip for two. Kid with a spinheel kick for two, and lightning kicks sets up a bodypress, but Ramon catches him in a blockbuster. Now it's punishment time, and Razor gets his monies worth - smacking the Kid around like a prison bitch. He folds him up like an accordion with a chokeslam, and slaps on an abdominal stretch - not even trying to the submission, but rather just toying with the Kid. Running powerslam and a side superplex, but Razor's still not ready to cover, and calls for the Razors Edge. But, no no. Kid doesn't get off that easy. Razor tosses him out to the floor, and pulls up the mats to give it to him on the exposed concrete instead - only for Kid to backdrop out! Kid goes to the top for a dive, but gets overexcited, and slips - landing face first on the exposed concrete (his head BOUNCING) in a horrifying botch. Vince: 'well, a gallant effort by the 1-2-3 Kid.' What compassion! Razor rolls him in (after checking to make sure he's not, like, dead), but Kid still manages to dodge a blind charge, and hit a flying moonsault - but it only gets two this time. Kid decides 'fuck it,' and grabs the sack with the $10,000, and makes a run for it - Ramon on his tail right out into the streets for a double countout at 5:15. Kid’s selling carried this, but holy shit, that botch was just terrifying to watch. Even having seen it dozens of times over the years, I still can’t believe he was okay. ¾*

Tatanka accepts Yokozuna’s challenge as well, on behalf of Native America

Virgil v Bastion Booger: Virgil with a takedown to set up a headbutt drop to the groin, but Booger blocks a figure four, as the announcers make fat jokes. Finally, something they can all bond over! Bullying brings the world together! Virgil misses a 2nd rope bodypress, allowing Booger a 2nd rope splash at 1:58. They couldn’t just do that for his debut match the week before? He really needed to go 50/50 with Virgil? “Who’s left?” wonders Booger on the way out of the ring. Uh, literally everyone. DUD

Men on a Mission vignette. They ride the subway! Well, this is still pre-Giuliani New York, so I guess that’s a fair indication of toughness. Point, them

Boni Blackstone brings Bam Bam Bigelow out, so she can get a good look at his chest hair up close. But before she can lick her lips too much, Bigelow unveils Luna Vachon as his new girlfriend/manager. The segment was a little weird, with Bigelow talking about love and feelings, but this pairing was a much, much better fit than whatever her deal with Shawn Michaels was supposed to be

Stars and Stripes Challenge ad

Mr. Perfect v Burt Satano: Lawler notes that, clearly, this guy isn’t ‘perfect,’ using his hair as proof. Man has a point. Vince also makes the claim that Perfect might be ‘the greatest Intercontinental champion of all time, at one time.’ What does that even mean? Perfectplex finishes at 1:41. Perfect was in cruise control here. DUD

Gene is in the studio with another edition of Face to Face, with guests Money Inc. They promise to win the tag title back for a fourth time, but that was actually it for both guys, with neither winning a major title in North America again

Jim Duggan music video. Catchier than it should be. I should note that I initially mistyped ‘catchier,’ and my browser autocorrected to ‘catheter,’ which is fair

BUExperience: Not a major episode, but we had two star versus star matches (plus a third from RAW), so let’s call it a win this week.