WWF Superstars (July 9, 1994)

Original Airdate: July 9, 1994 (taped June 21)

From Wilkes-Barre, Pennsylvania; Your Hosts are Jim Ross and Jerry Lawler

Tatanka v Undertaker: Undertaker attacks from behind as Tatanka is distracted by Ted DiBiase, as Lawler claims that Tatanka was trying to take money from Ted. King may have had a point. Undertaker with a big boot (that misses by a mile), and the ropewalk forearm connects, followed by a choke in the corner. Lots more choking, until Tatanka makes a comeback. He tries a backdrop, but Undertaker blocks, and the tombstone finishes at 6:22. This was really bad. So, in kayfabe, did Tatanka throw this match? DUD

Todd Pettengill is in the studio for the SummerSlam Report. His big news this week is that the main event will be Undertaker v Undertaker. Todd openly acknowledges that he has no idea what that actually means, but he’s pretty excited about it nonetheless

Mabel v Black Phantom: Ross notes that Mabel is ‘over five hundred pounds, and expanding.’ That’s a take. Meanwhile, Jim and Jerry try to make sense of the announced SummerSlam main event, and poor Ross can’t even hype it with a straight face. Vince would have already sold it like the second coming of Hulk/Andre. Mabel with a legdrop at 2:03. Mabel wasn’t good, but he was looking enthusiastic here. ¼*

Live Event News is a look at 1-2-3 Kid’s chance-of-a-lifetime in challenging Bret Hart for the WWF Title this Monday on RAW. I like how they note that he earned the title shot by beating Nikolai Volkoff. Probably could have left that part out

Diesel v Chris Canyon: The WWF Intercontinental gold is not at stake. Canyon is the later WCW star, early in his career. Speaking of enthusiasm, Diesel is showing lots of it this week as well, and Canyon sells nicely for him. The powerbomb finishes at 2:54. ¼*

WWF Women's Title Match: Alundra Blayze v Luna Vachon: Blayze gets pyro and everything, in an attempt to make us believe that the promotion cares about this division. Which has exactly two workers in it. Blayze dumps Luna to the outside early on, but Vachon sweeps the leg from the floor, and posts the knee. Inside, Luna applies a Boston crab, and she goes to work, but Blayze finds a sunset flip out of the corner for two. Luna cuts her off with a catapult under the bottom rope, and a pump-splash gets the challenger two. Luna with a bodyslam to set up a flying splash, but Blayze rolls out of the way, and capitalizes with a bulldog. Alundra adds a bridging German suplex from there, and we’re out at 3:43. They were working hard, but ‘less than four minutes’ isn’t really enough time to build a proper story. * ¼ 

SummerSlam ad

New Generation ad

Owen Hart v Gary Scott: The Hart Brothers storyline continues to be the most interesting thing going on in the promotion, and it’s a shame they didn’t just give that the main focus, instead of the silly dueling Undertaker’s deal. Hart with the Sharpshooter at 2:39. Owen was showing good energy here. High energy? ¼*

Bret Hart video package 

Duke Droese v Jim Massenger: We get a fan doing the ring announcing here, and Lawler doesn’t even wait until after the match to draw cartoons on the screen - in this case flies to make fun of Droese’s odor. Duke with an elbowdrop at 1:52. DUD

Live Event News details some fan who won the opportunity to host Mania for a day with Pettengill. Thank God his accent doesn’t sound like he’s from Colorado, because I swear he looks like one of those Columbine assholes 

Yokozuna and company hype his match with Typhoon for next week. Yoko was looking horrible here, like he was really letting himself go. He couldn’t even be bothered to put his robe on for the bit

BUExperience: Even though this had two star/star matches, this was a pretty weak episode overall.