WWF WrestleMania V

WrestleMania IV ended with Hulk Hogan dramatically hoisting new WWF Champion Randy Savage’s arm up in victory – saving him from the devious plans of Ted DiBiase and Andre the Giant, and forming an alliance known as the ‘Mega Powers.’ Over the course of the year, the Mega Powers dominated in feuds with DiBiase, Andre, the Twin Towers, and others – but tensions between Hogan and Savage became flared when Savage became increasingly jealous of the Hulkster’s budding friendship with his girlfriend/valet Miss Elizabeth.

Things reached a boiling point on the WWF’s primetime ‘Main Event’ NBC special, when Elizabeth took a bump during a Mega Powers tag match, and Hogan running to her assistance finally sent Savage over the deep end – whacking Hulk with the title belt at the medical station, and launching into a brilliantly paranoid, jealously laden promo. While WrestleMania IV didn’t have a clear main event to sell the show on, WrestleMania V was built and sold on the anticipated showdown between Hulk Hogan and Randy Savage – billed as where the ‘Mega Powers Explode.’

From Atlantic City, New Jersey (once again at Trump Plaza); Your Hosts are Gorilla Monsoon and Jesse Ventura. Rockin’ Robin sings America the Beautiful to kick things off.


Opening Match: Haku v Hercules: Haku jumps him from behind, but ends up getting bodyslammed, and hit with a flapjack. Clothesline puts Haku outside, and a suplex brings him back in, but Haku manager Bobby Heenan distracts Herc, and allows Haku to jump him on the floor. Inside, Haku with a backbreaker, and he hugs him like a bear while calling the rest of the match. Once they get done chatting, Herc catches Haku with a bodypress out of a criss cross for two, and ducks when Haku tries to return the favor. Series of jabs take Haku off of his feet, and Herc starts firing off clotheslines before powerslamming him for two. Flying axehandle, but Haku catches him with a savate kick on the way down - but misses a 2^nd rope flying splash of his own, and Hercules with a side suplex to finish at 6:53. Surprisingly decent, and a solid opener. *

The Twin Towers v The Rockers: The Rockers lead them through a chase to wind the Towers as the bell sounds, and Big Bossman starts with Shawn Michaels proper-like, literally smacking him around. The Rockers double-team slow that down, so he bails to tag Akeem. Dance off with Shawn Michaels goes nowhere, so the Rockers start double-teaming again - working Akeem's arm. Bossman tags in to sandwich Marty Jannetty with Tower-gut bread, and they cut the ring in half - but Marty doesn't want seconds on sandwiches, and dodges to tag Shawn back in. Double 2^nd rope shoulderblocks take Akeem down, but a flying rana attempt on Bossman ends in a powerbomb, and Akeem splashes Michaels for the pin at 8:05. Considering Shawn and Marty had been partying hard all through the night before, and were severely hung over for this, it was quite the energetic performance. Think about having to get sandwiched between the guts of two four hundred pound guys, and then hit stereo flying dropkicks next time you call in sick on a Sunday. *

Ted DiBiase v Brutus Beefcake: DiBiase makes sure to show off his new Million Dollar Belt (and Virgil) off to Donald Trump, sitting in the front row. Beefcake is less impressed, however, unloading on him in the early going, and hitting a backdrop to put Ted on the outside. Inside, DiBiase tries to overwhelm him with closed fists, but Beefcake returns fire with a series of bodyslams, and another clothesline puts DiBiase back on the floor. Back in for a slugfest - and assist from Virgil allows DiBiase to takeover. Backelbow and a fistdrop for two, so DiBiase steps it up a notch with a 2^nd rope axehandle for two. Backdrop, but Beefcake counters into a cradle for two, and a suplex hits, leading to a double knockout spot. DiBiase recovers first with a suplex of his own, and he manages to hook the Million Dollar Dream - but Beefcake makes the ropes. Another slugfest goes the Barber's way, but another distraction from Virgil ends with both guys trading right hands on the floor - both getting counted out at 10:00. That was a TV-match ending if I've ever seen one, but decent (if unspectacular) stuff, otherwise. ¾*

The Bushwhackers v The Fabulous Rougeau Brothers: The 'Whackers were still newcomers (to the WWF) at this point. The Rougeau's stupidly try to double-team before the bell, but goofy brawling is where the Bushwhackers excel - so no dice. Luke and Raymond Rougeau start all official, but it doesn't take long for Butch to run in with a Battering Ram to put Raymond on the floor. The Rougeau's manage to take Luke down, and Ray slams him - but gets freaked out by Luke literally stroking his cock during the hold (I'm not kidding), and tags Jacques in to kill him proper. He tries an abdominal stretch, though I'm not sure putting your balls against the ass of the dude who just sexually assaulted your brother is really the best way to go about revenge. It doesn't matter anyway, 'cause Butch runs in, and another Battering Ram finishes Ray at 5:11. Just a Bushwhackers match. A Bushwhackers match with sexual assault. DUD

Mr. Perfect v The Blue Blazer: Blazer is Owen Hart under a mask, towards the end of his first WWF-run. Perfect tries to grab a side-headlock, but Blazer turns it into a criss cross - only to get hiptossed at the end. They trade slaps (which quickly turns into chops), and Blazer ends up slamming him, then dropkicking him to the outside. Baseball slide, and a pair of uppercuts send Perfect back inside for an armbar. Owen with another standing dropkick and a backbreaker for two, followed by a well executed overhead suplex. Flying splash, but it brutally hits the knees, and Perfect hooks a reverse chinlock to ground him. Blind charge misses, however, and Blazer with a powerslam for one. Another well executed suplex (belly-to-belly) for two, and a crucifix for two. He makes the mistake of arguing the count, however, and gets Perfectplexed at 5:49. Really well paced, well worked match - that likely could have reached classic territory if given more time. **

WWF Tag Team Title Handicap Match: Demolition v Mr. Fuji and The Powers of Pain: This came about after Demolition manager Mr. Fuji turned on them at Survivor Series, in turn aligning himself with the Powers of Pain. Ax starts with the Warlord, and Ax uses his relative speed advantage to take him down, then double-team with Smash. The Demos trade off working headvices early on, but Warlord powers Smash into the heel corner, and tags off to Barbarian. Even a triple-team advantage doesn't manage to slow Smash down much, however, and he slugs his way back over to Ax. He eventually gets overwhelmed when he makes the mistake of going after Fuji, and the challengers cut the ring in half with kick-punch stuff. Fuji's attempt at a flying legdrop misses, however, and Ax manages to make the tag. House of arson sequence quickly triggers a five-way brawl, but a Fuji salt throw gets ducked, and with the Powers out of it, the champs finish Fuji with the Decapitator at 8:55. Dull, and worst of all, didn't really live up to the hype as the blowoff to the shocking double-turn at Survivor Series. DUD

Ronnie Garvin v Dino Bravo: Since literally no one cares about this match, Jimmy Snuka (making his return after some four years off chillin' and killin') comes out (like, all the way to the ring - with Garvin and Bravo already there, waiting for the opening bell), bows, and leaves - presumably so the crowd can at least say something of note happened here. Maybe Trump was just a really big fan, and summoned him as an interlude from this crap. Bravo jumps him while Garvin tries to figure out what the fuck Jimmy Snuka was doing, and absolutely destroys him - beating him from end to end of the ring. Shoulderblock, but Garvin fights his way out of a powerbomb attempt, and splashes Dino for two. Turnbuckle smashes, as Gorilla Monsoon tries to explain the dead crowd as 'in awe.' Yeah, I've been 'in awe' a lot during this show, too. Sleeper doesn't even get a token arm drop from Bravo, so he tries a sunset flip for two, and a ten-punch count - but Bravo shrugs that off with an inverted atomic drop, and sidewalk slams him for the pin at 4:00. And Garvin's WWF run is off to a great start! This had no place on pay per view. DUD

Strike Force v The Brain Busters: This is actually Strike Force's first match together in nearly a year, as Rick Martel had been taking time off (selling a kayfabe injury from Demolition), and Tito Santana working as a single. Rick Martel starts with Tully Blanchard, and they get right into trading off on the mat - Arn Anderson firing off a cheap shot before even a minute has passed. That triggers a four-way brawl, and stereo dropkicks clear the Busters out. The dust settles on Martel and Anderson, and a DDT gets Rick two. Test-of-strength ends with Arn locking him in a bodyscissors, but Martel counters into a Boston Crab - only to have Tully reach over and rake the eyes. Both men tag, and Strike Force quickly work in the double-figure four spot, before Tito wins a bridge sequence by backsliding Tully for two. Inside cradle gets two, but a miscommunication ends with Tito blasting Martel with the jumping forearm - leaving him reeling on the floor. The distraction allows the Busters to start cutting the ring in half, until Tito manages to slam Arn off of the top rope, and he crawls for Martel - but Rick decides he's still dazed from the forearm, and turns his back on Santana. That allows Tully a stungun, as Martel outright jumps off of the apron, and takes a walk to the dressing room. Unfortunately, it's not to bring out Hulk Hogan, but instead to turn heel. Meanwhile, the Busters destroy Tito, and finish with a well executed spike piledriver at 9:17. Afterwards, Martel cuts a promo from backstage with Gene Okerlund - making his heel turn official. The Strike Force breakup was never handled properly in the long run, but it started off well enough here, and the match was well paced and well worked. * ½

Piper's Pit: Roddy Piper (returning to the WWF after a couple of years off trying to make it in Hollywood) hosts, with guests Brother Love and Morton Downey, Jr - a pseudo celebrity at best, who would be bankrupt within a year of this. The segment is a gigantic waste of time (running some twenty minutes), where Piper first scares Brother Love out of the ring, and eventually blasts Downey with a fire extinguisher for blowing cigarette smoke in his face. It's not an unfunny segment, per se, but the crowd was already 'in awe' enough, and this brought the show to an absolute standstill - with six matches still to go.

Andre the Giant v Jake Roberts: Big John Studd is the special referee for this, which came about after Jake had given Andre a 'heart attack' on a memorable Saturday Night's Main Event segment. Andre grabs Jake by the hair on the way in, and pulls him right over for a turnbuckle smash - having exposed the buckle during Jake's entrance. That leaves Roberts reeling, so Andre goes into choke-mode - as Gorilla Monsoon talks about Jake's 'ominous green sack.' Don't worry, kids, he was just talking about Jake's snake - not balls. Jake eventually manages to get Andre tied up in the ropes to choke back, and unload some closed fists (with the great touch of hurting his hand on Andre's head). Andre goes back to the chokes, so Jake fires off fists of fury, and returns the favor by ramming Andre into the exposed buckle. Jake goes for the snake, but Ted DiBiase (who had started what would be a long running feud with Jake on TV a couple of weeks earlier) steals the python, sending Roberts running up the aisle after him. Genius Andre doesn't hang back and let him get counted out, though, instead taking the time to start attacking Studd, and getting himself disqualified at 9:39. It was literally all choking, followed by a bad ending. -*

The Hart Foundation v Rhythm and Blues: Bret Hart starts with Honky Tonk Man, and Hart quickly cradles him for two. Inverted atomic drop sends Honky scurrying to Greg Valentine - but Hart gives him an inverted atomic of his own. Dropkick, and he tags Jim Neidhart for a well executed slingshot shoulderblock. Tag back to Bret with a backbreaker, but a 2^nd rope elbowdrop hits the mat, and Valentine forces him into the home corner for a little friendly double-teaming. R&B cut the ring in half, and Honky clobbers Bret with the Shake Rattle 'n' Roll - but makes the mistake of tagging Valentine instead of covering. Greg keeps the momentum going with a gutbuster for two, but Hart dodges a cradle, and gets the tag off to Neidhart. House of arson, but a four-way brawl breaks out, and Bret gets hold of Jimmy Hart's megaphone to bop Honky for the pinfall at 7:40. Made good use of tags, and having Bret take the heat segment was a smart move - making the heels look like killers. * ½

WWF Intercontinental Title Match: The Ultimate Warrior v Rick Rude: Warrior charges right in, so Rude tries a kneelift out of reflex - only to run it right into the title belt he still has around his waist. Warrior throws Rude around like a toy, and hugs him like a bear at center ring. Rude rakes the eyes to break, but Warrior keeps slamming him around (Rude selling it all wonderfully), and a backdrop sends Rude flying. Splash, but Rude raises the knees, and piledrives him for two. Chincrusher, but he can't swivel his  hips - paying the toll for the bearhug. Rude Russian legsweep, and he hooks a bow-and-arrow - but Warrior starts BLOWING UP!! Faceslams! Backbreaker! Clothesline! Shoulderblock! - but a blind charge misses, and Rick tries to give him a Rude Awakening, but Warrior powers free and clotheslines Rude over the top. Suplex back in, but Rude-manager Bobby Heenan springs into action, and sweeps the leg, allowing Rick to topple him for the title at 9:42. Rude's selling was magnificent here (he worked hard throughout), but Warrior blew up quickly, and killed the excitement with restholds in the early going. ** ¼

Bad News Brown v Jim Duggan: Because Saturday Night's Main Event simply COULD NOT contain this! Brown jumps him on the way in, but quickly misses a blind charge, and eats clothesline. He decides to head home (hey, would you want to spend time touching Jim Duggan?), but changes his mind halfway up the aisle - only to run into a fist as he climbs back in. Headbutts turn the tide, but the Ghetto Blaster misses, and Duggan hits the 3-Point Stance. That leads to a standoff with Brown grabbing a chair, and Duggan his 2x4 for a double disqualification at 3:47. All punch-kick, but too listless to be a proper brawl. DUD

Red Rooster v Bobby Heenan: This came about on an episode of SNME when Heenan (Rooster's manager at the time) slapped him around, triggering a face turn. Heenan is still selling the beating Warrior gave him after the Intercontinental Title match, but it doesn't much matter, as Rooster schoolboys him at 0:32 - and thank God, 'cause this show desperately needs to wrap up. DUD

Main Event: WWF Title Match: Randy Savage v Hulk Hogan: As promised, Miss Elizabeth stands in a neutral corner. Savage psyches Hogan out - quickly ducking to the floor, and stealing a foam finger from a little Hulkamaniac (which hilariously ends up in the hands of a kid Donald Trump has brought to the show – which today would have Occupy alarm bells going off everywhere). Hogan dominates the initial lockup, and sends Randy back to the floor with a powerful shoulderblock, so Macho lures him into a chase, and hides behind Elizabeth. Hogan takes his complaints directly to Trump, but he doesn't seem to give a shit if anyone decks her or not, and the Hulkster is on his own to make the decision. He decides on a tentative no, and heads in to hook Savage in a side-headlock - but gets suplexed to break. Hulk retains the momentum with an armbar, so Savage goes to the eyes to turn the tide, and blasts him with a flying axehandle for two. Armbar (a nice one, too - driving his knee into Hogan's face to keep him horizontal), but Hulk tugs the tights - sending Savage flying to the floor. He drags him in for a series of turnbuckle smashes, and a series of elbowdrops follow, but a backdrop ends with Savage lifting his boot (busting Hogan open), and he hits a hangman's clothesline for two. Chinlock, and a kneelift runs Hogan into the corner - allowing Randy to schoolboy him for two. Savage works the cut, but a slap to the face is crossing the line, and Hogan unloads closed fists in the corner. Slam over-the-top to the floor leaves Savage for dead, but Elizabeth can't take it anymore, and runs over to kiss the booboo. Savage flips out on her, of course, so Hogan runs down to make the save - but a charge into the post gets blocked by Liz, and Savage reverses. She checks on Hogan now, and if you thought Savage was pissed before - that was 'happy Randy.' He shoves her around until the referee steps in, and orders her to the dressing room before the enchanting aroma of her vagina gets in the way of all this Mega Power exploding. Hogan's still selling the post, so Savage clobbers him with a flying axehandle to the outside, and chokes him with his wrist tape for good measure. Flying Elbowdrop time, but Hogan's HULKING UP!! Fists of Fury! Big Boot! Legdrop! New Champion at 17:54! Match was appropriately epic for the angle, and featured hard work from both - getting the angles across, as well as solid selling from Hogan throughout. ***

BUExperience: Not as bad as WrestleMania IV, but man, it’s not like they weren’t trying. Fourteen matches spread over nearly four hours, and packed with filler like Piper’s Pit, a RUN-DMC in-ring ‘WrestleMania Rap,’ and tons of TV-quality matches – all in front of a largely disinterested crowd. The main event was a big deal at the time, and is still well remembered today (as well as a good match), but there’s so much junk leading up to it that even the other decent stuff (Warrior/Rude, Perfect/Blazer, Brain Busters/Strike Force) get drowned in it.

Overall, the show comes off like Elaine in that episode of Seinfeld – you almost keep plowing through it through sheer force of will – you’ve eaten a lot of crap, and you’re due that damn main event. *