WCW Monday Nitro (June 3, 1996)

Original Airdate: June 3, 1996  

From Asheville, North Carolina; Your Hosts are Tony Schiavone and Larry Zbyszko (hour one); Eric Bischoff and Bobby Heenan (hour two)

Gene Okerlund brings Shark out for an interview, and he's still got half his head shaved the way Big Bubba left him last week. And it's not like this is taped during the same event as last weeks episode like RAW did, the poor guy had to walk around all week looking like that. I love how Gene calls what Bubba did "one of the most disgusting and despicable acts" he's ever seen, when it's literally the exact same thing Brutus Beefcake used to do every week that everyone used to get so excited about. However, Shark notes that he's not a fish, and he's not an avalanche... he's a five hundred pound man. So, call him John Tenta from now on

Big Bubba Rogers v John Tenta: One of the rare onscreen gimmick changes over the years, and coincidentally enough, he's facing a guy who once went through the same thing. Not the same without Nick Bockwinkel stripping him of his gimmick, though. Bubba scatters Tenta's hair clippings all over the ring, infuriating the non-fish. Tenta slams him, then grabs a pair of scissors and tries to get stabby, so Bubba understandably runs away at 1:06. This wasn't even a match, really. DUD

The Faces of Fear v High Voltage: This is Voltage's TV debut, and Robbie Rage is called 'Ruckus' here. Barbarian starts with Kenny Kaos, and he destroys him, but Ruckus gets the tag in, and High Voltage manages a double team. That whole sequence looked terrible and amateurish from conception to grave. Barbarian drops Ruckus with a powerbomb before passing to Meng to dropkick his ass, and deliver a backbreaker. Back to Barbarian for a pumphandle-slam and an overheard superplex, and the Faces look to finish with stereo flying headbutts, so Kaos runs in to break up the pin. That ends badly for him, and Meng superkicks Ruckus for three at 3:24. Some debut. Amazingly, this team would soldier on for several YEARS after this introduction. ½*

Backstage, Gene Okerlund is on Lex Luger's case for interfering in Sting's friendly match with Scott Steiner last week, but Lex makes a good point about how if Scott is such a good 'friend,' why was he trying to suplex Sting on the floor? This leads to the Steiner Brothers coming in to retort, and the whole thing quickly breaks down into shoving ahead of their tag title match later on tonight

Hulkamania is running wild on Monday Nitro! I like how they keep showing us footage of him every week in his absence, like we might forget who he is without the constant reminders

Sgt. Craig Pittman v Disco Inferno: The sight of a bunch of middle aged women energetically dancing along with Disco's entrance is a GIF waiting to happen. Pittman keeps shooting for the arm, but Disco gets away from him, and works a headlock. He stops to dance, however, allowing Pittman to dig into him, but Disco submits before Craig can even apply the Code Red at 1:47. Weird that the show is now twice as long, but the matches have all suddenly been chopped down to nothing. I mean, guys are so worried about time that they're submitting before holds are even being applied! Afterwards, Disco smirks that he obviously wouldn't let Pittman break his arm, because then how would he disco dance? Okay, that was actually really cute. DUD

Lord Steven Regal v Jim Duggan: Regal stalls to start, as usual. Duggan manages to nail him with a trio of clotheslines to send Steven bailing for the floor, and he name checks his old feud with Zbyszko while he's out there. I love it when they bother with continuity like that, even if it is just in an offhand way. Regal manages to get control on the way back in, but misses a somersault senton splash, and Jim makes the comeback. Really, a comeback after thirty seconds of offense. Anyway, while that goes on, Earl Robert Eaton comes out to distract the referee, so Duggan goes after him with a taped fist, but that allows Regal to schoolboy him at 3:46. Based on these match times, are we sure Vince Russo didn't come into WCW three years earlier than we thought? Afterwards, Okerlund comes out to talk about Regal getting fined for slapping Sting on Main Event last night, which is a very English thing to get fined for. DUD

We get a video package on the Kevin Sullivan/Chris Benoit feud, which has been playing out almost exclusively on WCW Saturday Night. I actually appreciated this, since I wasn't regularly watching Saturday Night in 1996, and it's not on the Network as of this writing, so sometimes we get to a pay per view and a lot of the feuds don't resonate with me because all the build took place on the weekend shows

Kevin Sullivan v Prince Iaukea: Sullivan jumps him before the bell, and goes to town in the corner, as Larry talks about "remember when you were a kid and you'd catch flies and pulled the wings off to see if they could fly away?" like that's at all normal childhood behavior. I mean, maybe for serial killers. Sullivan just absolutely gobbles Iaukea up, beating him all around ringside, and hanging him in a tree of woe before finishing with the double stomp at 1:24. Total squash. Afterwards, Sullivan reminds us that Hulkamania is not dead, because he will be back, and they will still have a score to settle. Of course, when he did come back, Hulkamania was to bury Hulkamania himself. DUD

Ric Flair and Arn Anderson v The Rock 'n' Roll Express: In a nice bit of bookending, this is the Express' return to WCW for the first time since SuperBrawl III - which took place in this same arena. The Horsemen wear Kevin Greene and Steve McMichael's jerseys out to the ring tonight, in a funny bit. Arn and Ricky Morton start, and they feel each other out, when suddenly pyro goes off all over the arena to signal the start of the second house/announce team swap. At least they're right at the actual second hour this week, as opposed to a solid ten minutes early like last week. God, Morton looks ancient. Hard to believe he wasn't even forty years of age yet at this point. He looks like he's easily in his mid-50s. Robert Gibson hits Anderson with a flying bodypress for two, so Arn passes to the Nature Boy, and he criss crosses with Gibson. Robert wins that with a drop-toehold into a figure four, which brings Arn in for Morton to cut off with his own simultaneous figure four. This redneck heavy crowd is losing their shit for these old school Express spots, so clearly they knew their audience. The Horsemen bail after that, and things settle on Arn and Ricky, with Morton dominating him. Flair tags in and immediately goes to the eyes to deal with Ricky, and he unloads with the chops. The Horsemen go to work on Morton, as Bobby Heenan briefly steps away from the commentary position to go give Liz and Woman some advice for their men. Gibson gets the hot tag and goes wild on the Horsemen, Roseanne Barr the door! The Express hit them each with stereo dropkicks, and Gibson goes for the kill on Flair, but Woman interferes to block a rollup. That allows Arn to drop Robert with a DDT, and Slick Ric falls on top for the pin at 17:27. Felt like they were painting by numbers, but they're all such seasoned pros that it was like a paint-by-numbers Manet. Afterwards, Heenan joins them at the dinner table to sip champagne, and Gene wants to know what the 'meaning' of the Horsemen wearing the jerseys was supposed to be. What the fuck do you think, you bald fucking moron?! Gene also wants to know what Heenan was whispering to the women during the match, so Bobby clarifies that he was just telling her the name of a good jeweler here in town, in case she wants to get her diamonds polished up after the show. That's thoughtful. Oh, and he will be returning to managing for the first time since 1991 on behalf of the Horsemen at the Great American Bash! This aired opposite the Austin/Holly King of the Ring qualifier on RAW, as well as a Mankind squash. Give Nitro a very slight edge. * ¼

Glacier teaser

Hey guys, remember Hulk Hogan?! He's still around! Somewhere!

WCW World Title Match: Giant v Ice Train: Jimmy Hart immediately trips Train up, and Giant chokeslams his frozen ass at 0:28. Afterwards, Scott Norton comes out to protest what happened to his partner, so Giant chokeslam's him twice for sticking his nose in. Well, he made his point. Afterwards, Giant questions why they're airing video packages and music videos about Hulk Hogan when he's AWOL, while Giant is the world champion. Hey, fair point. This aired opposite RAW showing us the finish from the In Your House title match and Goldust's super weird nude promo on Ahmed Johnson. Call it a win for RAW

Scott Norton v Hugh Morrus: Scott is still down in the ring following the chokeslam, but Morrus doesn't even let him get to his feet, rushing in and hitting a legdrop. He's got an easy pin, but he wants to toy with Norton some first, and keeps backing off before the three count. Norton appears to be immobile, which causes some concern from the official, but it turns out to be a ploy, allowing Scott to lull Morrus into a false sense of security, and then dodge the moonsault at 1:45. Looked like Scott was supposed to catch him there, but that didn't work out, like, at all. To the shock of no one. I mean, of all the guys you might try to catch in midair, Hugh Morrus is not high up on that list. This aired opposite the dull Godwinns/Tekno Team 2000 match over on RAW, so point for Nitro simply because their show didn't feature Tekno Team 2000. It's as simple as that. DUD

Over at the Power Plant, Steve McMichael and Kevin Greene continue to train. More Jody Hill stuff here. This was tremendously entertaining, but probably not in the way that they were going for. Greene snacking on Slim Jims and Mongo holding a football while learning to run the ropes are just some of the endless highlights here. Much better than more of that Godwinn squash over on RAW

WCW World Tag Team Title Match: Lex Luger and Sting v The Steiner Brothers: Scott Steiner hits Sting with a suplex right away, as Randy Savage calls in to discuss managing the football players at the Bash as a counter to Heenan's efforts, so the announcers pay zero attention to the match. Couldn't they have done this during one of the nothing matches? Steiner with a tilt-a-whirl, but Sting fights him off with a hotshot, and hits a one-handed bulldog before passing to Lex. Luger puts the boots to Scott, but telegraphs a backdrop, and takes a tigerbomb for two. The announcers have literally paid zero attention to this thus far. Rick Steiner tags in for an overhead suplex and an armbar, as Savage finally gets off the phone. Rick with a Steinerline for two, and a belly-to-belly superplex sets up a flying bulldog for two - Sting breaking up the pin. That allows him to tag in for the Stinger Splash, and he gets the Scorpion Deathlock on, but Scott breaks it up. He tags in and hits Sting with a belly-to-belly suplex, then takes his ass up top for a rana down, but Lex breaks up the cover. Scott keeps focused with a suplex, but Sting is able to counter with an inverted DDT, and he passes to Lex for a powerslam. Torture Rack looks to finish, but Rick breaks it up, and they spill to the outside for a brawl. Lex tries a suplex out there, but Rick cuts that off, and takes Luger in to hit with a Steinerline - Roseanne Barr the door, we've got a kettle on now! Both teams brawl, when Giant suddenly shows up, and starts beating everyone up until the referee throws the match out at 8:25. Giant keeps attacking everyone, but they eventually put their differences aside and work together to clean house to a big pop. This was fun, but certainly nowhere near the level of their SuperBrawl match from '91. This aired opposite the horrible HHH/Roberts match on RAW, so it's a definite win for Nitro. ** ½

And finally, as Bischoff and Heenan wrap things up, Scott Hall shows up to antagonize Eric again, but this time Sting comes over on his way back to the dressing rooms to get in his face. They get into each other’s faces, and nearly come to blows, but security is able to intervene - though not before Hall is able to promise a big surprise for WCW next week

BUExperience: Not a great episode, but better than the first two hour effort from last week, and better than RAW, so that checks the right boxes, I guess.

Monday Night Wars Rating Chart

	6/3/96
Show	RAW	Nitro
Rating	2.3	3.0
Total Wins	16	17
Win Streak		3
Better Show (as of 6/3)	8	24