WWF Superstars (June 27, 1992)

Original Airdate: June 27, 1992 (taped June 1)

From Hamilton, Ontario, Canada; Your Hosts are Vince McMahon and Mr. Perfect

Davey Boy Smith v Nick Danger: Perfect has a field day with Bulldog's hair here, and you know it's bad when it stands out in the sea of unfortunate early 90s hairstyles that this show is. Bulldog is still focused on Repo Man at this point (he wants to take him to obedience school!), so clearly no one was happier when SummerSlam moved to London than him. That basically changed the trajectory of his entire career. He probably never would have gotten a main event push in WCW without it, and in turn in the WWF later. Running Powerslam finishes at 2:19. ¼*

Tatanka takes some kids down by the river for a talk. While in his underwear. It's so weird seeing him cut a promo on Rick Martel in front of a bunch of kids who look like they've never seen the WWF before. Also, his anti-drug message is welcome, but probably would come off a lot better if he wasn't, you know, practically naked. Oh, unless he's supposed to be the example of what happens if you abuse drugs? In which case, carry on, carry on

The Nasty Boys v Rick Johnson and Chico Martinez: Where's Jesse Ventura when you need him? Johnson is actually a big dude, and is dressed/styled much like Sting. He probably could have made bank in WCW as the various imposter Stings over the years. How did the Nasty Boys have a career? No, really, serious question. It's one thing if they came along later, like in the era when garbage wrestling was the norm, but their ring work is so sloppy and rough that I'm surprised they ever got anywhere with it, let alone to the top of the field in multiple promotions. And you can't even say 'oh, they're friends with Hogan,' because they got to the top without him. He probably had to do with their longevity, though. Jerry Sags finishes Chico with a flying elbowdrop at 2:40. DUD

Tito Santana calls out Rick Martel. Boy, Rick sure had a lot of issues with various minorities, didn't he? Not saying he was a Nazi. But not not saying it, either

Repo Man doesn't like summer. Yeah, I used to feel the same way. A little cornstarch down there will fix you up, brother

Razor Ramon is chilling in a cafe when some attractive blonde girl comes up asking for a second date, but Razor lets her know that he got what he wants, and is 'done with her.' Cold as ice. God, Razor is so far ahead of the rest of the guys on this show, and it's especially noticeable when presented right after a total cartoon character like Repo

Virgil v Glen Ruth: Vince notes that Virgil is the 'perfect example' of what drug free in the WWF is all about, which feels almost like a code to tell guys that they better start hitting the drugs, or else their careers are going to start looking like Virgil's. There is no way this jobber grew up to be Headbanger Thrasher. Seriously, he looks like my accountant on his day off (I assume... he never wants to hang out). Virgil with a Russian legsweep at 1:57. What a weak finisher. I mean, Bret Hart was using it as a set up move during this same period, and there's nothing about Virgil's version that makes it particularly brutal. ¼*

The Bushwhackers take an aerobics class. Which actually looks like it could be pretty funny, but we only get quick clips of it here, since they're hyping it up as a feature on Coliseum Video. Sadly, that particular tape is not on the Network yet, depriving me of seeing Luke and Butch properly annoying housewives

The Natural Disasters are naturally beefy. Seriously, these two look like the poster boys for heart disease

Papa Shango might have Parkinson’s. That's no joke, he should see a doctor

Berzerker v Bruce Mitchell: Mitchell is dressed like he's trying to replace Rick Rude, if Rick Rude was a guy who never hit the gym or tanning salon. Berzerker, meanwhile, is still openly threatening to chop people's heads off, which you'd think would at least warrant an inquiry from Jack Tunney's office, but nope. I guess Mr. Fuji's checks cleared. Berzerker with a slam, and he dumps the kid to the outside for the countout at 2:32. This was a pretty boring squash, feeling endless even at well under three minutes. DUD

The Legion of Doom and Paul Ellering are trying to get back to their roots by hanging out in a literal pile of rubble. You know, as one does. While there, they come upon a ventriloquist’s dummy, which apparently is the secret key to everything. I get that this is supposed to be the remains of their childhood home, but why would the dummy even be there? Like, did it just stay behind for twenty years while other people lived there? Did it have its own apartment? Was it sentient? I mean, these are important questions... we could be looking at a dummy murder case here, guys

Nailz v John Gullen: Nailz goes right to the choke, but I'm still trying to get over that last segment, so I can't really be bothered with this match. How the hell did that shit even make it past the spitballing phase? And to give it to one of the most badass teams of all time? Anyway, Nailz with the sleeper at 1:18. Maybe they just stumbled onto the trick to getting Nailz over... run his matches right after really stupid shit, and no one will notice how terrible he is. DUD

Kerry Von Erich v Duane Gill: Kerry's still doing the thing where he kisses all the girls on the way to the ring, which seems especially uncomfortable in the time of both SpeakOut and COVID-19. Like, this dude would be dead in 2020. I mean, this dude IS dead in 2020, but you know what I mean. I mean. Von Erich with a lazy discus punch at 1:31. DUD

Kamala v Johnny Lee: I wasn't watching the product regularly yet at the point, so most of my exposure to 1992 was through Coliseum Video a couple of years later, and man, if you only watched the pay per views, you'd think this was a banging year for them, but the weekly stuff is pretty terrible. I love it now, but nothing here is exactly making me think SummerSlam is going to be awesome, or that we're coming off of a huge WrestleMania. Kamala with a splash at 1:29. DUD

Shawn Michaels is better than everybody. Well, honestly, probably true

Sgt. Slaughter claims that people come up to him all the time, telling him to 'keep going.' Who are these people, and have we done a bed count at the local insane asylum?

BUExperience: God, did they give up on running feature matches entirely for the whole summer? Was there some sort of bet involved?