WWF Coliseum Video Collection: SuperTape III (1991) (Version II)

WWF Coliseum Video Collection: SuperTape III (1991)

 

Coliseum Video compilation. The front cover of the tape features The Legion of Doom, while the back promises the most 'outrageous' hits. Hoffa?

 

Sean Mooney and Lord Alfred Hayes host, with the idea being that they're playing airline pilots since the theme is 'high flying action.' That would actually be a really cool tape if they had those kinds of workers at this point. Which they absolutely don't. Mooney hopes we've prepared a large landing strip for him, so clearly this is going to be a late night deal

 

Hasbro action figures ad

 

WWF Intercontinental Title Match: Kerry Von Erich v Mr. Perfect: From a house show in Toronto Ontario Canada on September 16 1990. Perfect does a big oversell off of a shove out of the initial lockup, and Kerry tries a corner whip, but the challenger rebounds with a sleeper. Kerry's got quite a lot of tape on his fingers tonight, did he think he was going to have to blade, like, eight times out there? Because that would be quite the house show effort. Perfect works that sleeper forever, and this referee is wearing really weird shoes that make him look like he's officiating in socks. Kerry finally escapes, and lookie here, he's bleeding from the nose. Okay, one down. Perfect with a somersault necksnap and an inside cradle for two, but a dropkick misses, and Kerry makes the comeback. Clawhold sets up the Tornado Punch, but Perfect ends up on the outside off of it, though Kerry barely seems to notice. The champ follows to nail him with a chop, but he gets reversed into the post, and Perfect picks up a countout win at 7:38. You can't say they didn't try with Von Erich, especially starting him off in a feud with Perfect, which is, well, the perfect type of opponent to bump around and make him look like a star. But that dude looked like he was on another planet here, and he never had a chance on a national stage. That he did as well as he did is nothing short of miraculous. ¼* (Original rating: ½*)

 

Back on the plane, Mooney keeps barking orders at Hayes, and his ass is gonna get stabbed if he keeps it up. Alfred is a leader, not a follower. Everybody knows it. Everybody knows it

 

Barbarian v Jimmy Snuka: From a house show in Toronto Ontario Canada, June 17 1990. Lots of posturing to start, and Barbarian grabs a standing headlock that he works for a while. Snuka escapes and uses a bunch of chops to send Barbarian to the outside for some regrouping, and I should note we're already five minutes in, and they've only done, like, three moves. If that. Back in, Jimmy grabs a headlock, but Barbarian whips him into the ropes, and they collide for a stalemate. Snuka comes at him with a bodypress for two, but Barbarian bails after taking a dropkick, breaking the momentum. Lots more posturing, until Barbarian clubs him down, but telegraphs a backdrop, and Snuka grabs a wristlock. I should note that the previous sentence encompassed three full minutes of the contest. Snuka tries a hiptoss, but Barbarian blocks with a clothesline, and he throws a knee. Snuka ends up on the outside, so Barbarian follows to ram him into the post, followed by a smash into the guardrail. Snuka tries a slingshot sunset flip on the way back in, but it only gets two. The execution there was embarrassing. Barbarian responds with a bearhug, and I have to give it to Mooney and Hayes for actually making this sound like a decent wrestling match. That's professionalism. Snuka chops his way out of the hold, and he makes a comeback. Headbutt drop gets two, and even the announcers are calling out how slowly Jimmy is moving here. 2^nd rope bodypress hits, but Barbarian rolls through for two. Snuka tries charging in the corner to keep control, but he hits boot, and Barbarian hooks a leveraged pin at 15:13. That's not a typo. They really did stretch a three minute match out to fifteen, and made people pay actual money for it. Man, house shows were horrible back in the day. Which is especially strange when you remember that they were the main focal point for their business at the time. ¼* (Original rating: -**)

 

Mooney wants to get the flight back on course, so hopefully that means a match that doesn't have me eyeing an electrical socket while holding a fork

 

Earthquake v Tugboat: TV taping dark match from Springfield Illinois on October 9 1990. Tugboat attacks before the bell, blitzing him until Earthquake bails. He regroups out there for a bit, but still ends up in a standing headlock after coming back in. Earthquake reverses, and they do a bit where they collide during some criss crosses for stalemates. Earthquake finally gets the better of it with a running dropkick (and getting some crazy height on it), and that's enough to take control. He works Tugboat over in dull fashion, and a pair of elbowdrops get two. Even the near falls are dull. Whip into the ropes sees Tugboat no-sell a shoulderblock, and he delivers a clothesline to set up a big splash. Cover, but Jimmy Hart is on the apron, and Tugboat is distracted. Earthquake recovers, but Tugboat is ready with a dropkick of his own, so Dino Bravo runs in for the DQ at 6:23. This was really boring. ¼* (Original rating: DUD)

 

Back on the plane, Mooney is ready with some airline puns to describe the last match. Where was this guy in 2002 when they needed him?

 

Six-Man Tag Team Match: Ultimate Warrior and The Legion of Doom v Demolition: The main event of a New York City house show on September 21 1990. Warrior is the WWF Champion at this point. Animal starts with Smash, and gets clobbered right away. He comes back with a powerslam for two, and an elbowdrop finds the mark. Crush gets the tag, but Hawk dives in with a flying axehandle on him, and they trade off. Crush rakes the eyes to get control, and a backbreaker connects. Criss cross sees Hawk fire back with a clothesline and a standing dropkick, followed by a jumping shoulderblock to set up a fistdrop for two. Headlock, so Crush goes to the eyes to escape, and passes to Ax. Unfortunately for him, Warrior tags in, and obliterates him in the corner. The rest of the team run in on him, but Warrior fights them all off, only to miss a splash on Ax. That allows Ax to dump him to the outside for the others to abuse, though Warrior only halfheartedly sells for, you know, one of the greatest and most dominant tag teams in history. Wouldn't want him to look weak, after all. They continue to triple team to cut the ring in half, but the LOD keep coming in with blatant cheating, and Animal is able to get the tag out of it - Roseanne Barr the door! The LOD go for the Doomsday Device on Ax, but Smash cuts them off, and Animal ends up in a bearhug from Crush as the referee restores order. I'm guessing they must have had to draw straws to figure out who would have to sell in this one. Crush cross corner whips him, but it backfires when Animal rebounds with a clothesline, and there's the hot tag to Warrior - Roseanne Barr that door again! Jumping shoulderblock sets up a splash on Smash at 12:22. I'm honestly surprised Ax didn't take the pin there. This was basic, but energetic, and engaging. This was notable as LOD's MSG debut, Crush's MSG debut, and Ax's final appearance in the venue. * ¼ (Original rating: ¼*)

 

The Legion of Doom promise that 'no medicine in the world, not even Nyquil' will help Demolition when they get done with them. Maybe they should offer them something a bit stronger. Come on, not like they don't have it

 

Demolition v The Legion of Doom: TV taping dark match from Syracuse New York on November 20 1990. Crush and Animal start, and Animal bodyslams him out of the initial lockup, but an elbowdrop misses. Crush with a bodyslam, but a legdrop misses, so Smash runs in, but Hawk cuts him off, and the LOD clean house. Dust settles on Smash and Hawk, and Hawk unloads a ten-punch in the corner, before pinballing him with Animal in the other corner. Hawk with a jumping shoulderblock, followed by a short-clothesline, but Crush comes in to help Smash block a suplex. A cheap shot from Mr. Fuji allows Smash to dump him to the outside, where Crush and Fuji abuse Hawk with the cane. Inside, Demolition work Hawk over, cutting the ring in half with a really boring heat segment. The Decapitation looks to finish, but Animal breaks up the pin at two, and Hawk is able to capitalize by clotheslining Crush. Tag to Animal, and Roseanne Barr the door! Doomsday Device looks to finish, but Fuji trips Hawk up as he climbs the ropes, allowing Smash to hit Animal with a backbreaker to set up a flying kneedrop from Crush. Hawk breaks up the pin, so Crush brawls with him, as Smash hits Animal with a side suplex. Piledriver, but he can't execute it, and Hawk dives off the top with a flying clothesline at 9:14. That finish was cool in theory, but they were out of position, and you could see Smash looking around to see where Hawk was, which looked terrible. Has any top team fallen harder and faster than Demolition in 1990? ½* (Original rating: ¼*)

 

Back on the plane, Hayes has abandoned his post, though Mooney seems completely nonplussed. Honestly, if I was stuck in a small metal tube with Alfred Hayes, I'd be fine with increasing the possibility of crashing into the side of a mountain too

 

Call of the Action! Oh, I love these! We're probably going to learn really complex moves like 'backdrop,' buckle up! We look at clips of a Shane Douglas squash against Black Demon, as Hayes puts him over as the next big thing in the WWF. Well, no wonder he got such an inflated ego. We learn some pretty heavy moves this week, like 'sunset flip' and even 'backelbow.' Teaching the move names isn't a bad idea, but does 'boot to the midsection' really need its own section? Also, a 'flying bodypress' is not a 'flying crucifix'

 

Back on the plane, Mooney still has no pilot, but he's got a Paul Roma match coming up, so again, the sweet release of death was probably feeling increasingly welcome. You know what, that's actually not fair. Roma's actually not a bad worker, he just has a bad reputation. I apologize, Paul

 

Marty Jannetty v Paul Roma: Also from the September 21 1990 house show in New York. Marty attacks before the bell, and hits Roma with an atomic drop, leading to a ten-punch in the corner. Rana sets up mounted punches, so Roma dumps him to the outside to buy time, and that's enough to turn the tide. Roma rams him into the apron out there, but Marty beats the count, so Paul welcomes him in with some stomps. Jannetty tries a sunset flip, but Roma blocks, so Marty starts using his speed to try and turn it around that way, but he telegraphs a backdrop, and gets clobbered. That allows Roma a pair of corner whips, and a two-alarm no-release backbreaker leads to a running powerslam. Impressive power display there. Marty tries fighting back with a small package for two, but Roma immediately cuts him off, and puts him in a chinlock. Jannetty escapes, so Roma clobbers him with a clothesline, and it's back to the chinlock. Marty escapes again, but a corner splash misses, and Paul drops an elbow before going back to the hold a third time. Marty slugs free, so Roma tries cutting him off with a vertical suplex, but Jannetty reverses, and it's comeback time! 2^nd rope one-handed bulldog sets up the flying fistdrop, but Hercules pulls him off at two. Jannetty stays on Paul with a superkick, but a bodyslam ends badly when Hercules trips him, allowing Roma to topple for the pin at 13:38. Too many chinlocks in the middle here. If you're going to rely on rest holds, would it kill you to at least vary it up? * (Original rating: ¼*)

 

Back on the plane, Hayes is back, so Mooney can get back to making airline puns at a mile a minute

 

A family of five from West Palm Beach Florida want to see Big Boss Man crush Ted DiBiase. Was everyone other than the dad being held at gunpoint there?

 

Big Boss Man v Ted DiBiase: TV taping dark match from Providence Rhode Island on August 8 1990. DiBiase tries a sneak attack, but it backfires, and Boss Man unloads on him. Not really fair to call it a 'sneak attack' really, Boss Man wasn't letting him get in the ring to start the match, and the stupid referee wasn't doing shit about it. To the outside, Boss Man chokes and whips him with his belt, and back inside, he uses a few back rakes. Of the many great things you could steal from Hulk Hogan, you start THERE? Splash misses, allowing Ted to nail him with his own nightstick, and he dumps him to the outside for a trip into the post. Back in, Ted hammers him with axehandles and a pointed elbowdrop, all to the lower back. 2^nd rope axehandle connects, and a cross corner whip puts more hurt on the back. Bearhug, but Boss Man escapes ahead of the third arm drop, and they criss cross for a double knockout spot. Ted is up first, and he tries another 2^nd rope axehandle, but Boss Man catches him with a fist to the gut this time, and he makes a comeback. Virgil hops up on the apron to try a distraction, so Boss Man pulls him into the ring to beat up, and that ends in him getting disqualified at 9:06. Oooh, he got Luger'd. I appreciated the psychology, but the match itself was pretty boring. ½* (Original rating: *)

 

As promised, it's time for the Most Outrageous Hits. Which is just a compilation of guys murdering various jobbers clotheslines and kicks, but with authority. Too bad the Steiner Brothers hadn't shown up yet, they could do a whole tape of just that

 

Back on the plane, Lord Alfred's piloting is taking a turn for the worst

 

WWF Intercontinental Title Match: Mr. Perfect v Jake Roberts: TV taping dark match from Utica New York on August 15 1990, a couple of weeks before Perfect dropped the title at SummerSlam. Though, by the time this tape came out, he was the champion again anyway. Jake gets distracted by Bobby Heenan at the bell, allowing Perfect to attack, and unload. Cross corner whip works, but the charge in doesn't, and Jake wrenches a wristlock. He works the arm for a while, so Perfect tries a charge out of frustration, but gets backdropped over the top for his troubles. Cue a distraction from Bobby, and that's enough to let Perfect finally turn the tide. He sends Jake into the post before taking him in to do some arm work of his own, but a corner charge hits boot, and Jake makes a comeback. DDT looks to finish, so Heenan runs in before the challenger can deliver it, and that's a DQ at 10:20. These guys basically got a whole match out of little more than a hammerlock, but their storytelling abilities were so good that it worked. ¾* (Original rating: *)

 

Back on the plane, things are going south in a hurry, so Mooney starts frantically yelling 'payday' into his walkie, and quoting David Bowie. Never a good sign

 

BUExperience: I personally think that everyone should experience a fifteen minute Barbarian/Snuka house show match in their lifetimes. But, even still, not a good addition to your Coliseum Collection.