From Roanoke, Virginia; Your Host is Jim Ross, with Jim Cornette (hour one), and with Jerry Lawler (hour two)
WWF Tag Team Champions Jesse James and Billy Gunn join us, but they’re still not calling themselves the New Age Outlaws yet, which makes Jesse’s opening spiel sound really weird (though only with the benefit of hindsight). The new tag champs gloat about taking the belts off of the Legion of Doom last week, and make all kind of ‘old’ jokes about them, until the LOD run out through the crowd (in street clothes) to chase them off. The crowd is still crazy into the LOD, but this was essentially their last gasp as a top team, as Gunn and James made them look like a couple of oldsters, and they never really recovered. James is legitimately younger than they are, but there’s only a couple of years between Billy and both Road Warriors, though I guess perception is reality
WWF Light Heavyweight Title Tournament Semifinal Match: Aguila v Taka Michinoku: Sunny joins us as the special guest ring announcer, and I know I’ve said this a million times as we’ve went through these 1997 shows, but they missed a giant opportunity by not finding something better for Sunny to do than random bits of ring announcing. Taka schools him on the mat, literally moments after Ross tells us that we won’t be seeing much mat wrestling in this contest. Aguila reverses a surfboard, but misses a dive, and Taka dives after him with a springboard flying bodypress on the floor. Aguila beats the count, so Taka takes him down in an STF, but he gets backdropped over the top. Aguila follows to whip him into the post out there, and he dives with a flying corkscrew moonsault on the floor. Aguila lands a jumping backelbow on the way back in, but he loses a criss cross, and Taka bodyslams him to set up a flying corkscrew senton splash - Aguila dodging. That allows Aguila a magistral cradle for two, but Taka counters a rana with a powerbomb for two. Missile dropkick finds its mark, and the Michinoku Driver finishes at 4:19. Some good highspots, but the match was being held together by duct tape. * ½
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Jerry Lawler brings Goldust and Luna Vachon out, and Goldust is crawling around on all fours, being led by Luna with a dog leash. Luna was the absolute perfect fit for the new direction of the character, though the direction itself is both confusing and uncomfortable. And speaking of that new direction, he’ll now be known as ‘The Artist Formerly Known as Goldust’
Backstage, the LOD suit up
It’s the 1997 Karate Fighters Tournament, featuring Jerry Lawler beating Tito Santana in the semifinals. Or ‘Burger King v Taco Bell,’ as they sell it
Four Corners Elimination Match: D-lo Brown v Chainz v Recon v Miguel Perez: Lots of Confederate flags in the crowd tonight. All four represented stables are at ringside for this, so don’t expect a clean finish. The crowd is more interested in chanting at Rock than the guys in the match anyway. Brown and Chainz start, and Chainz dominates. He forces a tag to Recon, and they criss cross for about an hour before Recon delivers a rana. Brown fires back with a spinheel kick, and he tags Chainz back in. Recon tries tagging out, but Chainz hits him with a death valley driver at 2:02. Brown runs in on him right away, and he wins a slugfest in the corner. Backdrop, but Chainz blocks, and clotheslines him down, before passing to Perez. Brown fights him off, but loses a criss cross when Perez hooks a cradle at 3:10. Chainz attacks as Perez gets back to his feet, and he delivers another DVD, but everyone runs in for a no-contest at 3:34. Nothing to this one. ¼*
DX join us, and WWF Champion & WWF European Champion Shawn Michaels is in a wheelchair this week. Their targets this week are Commissioner Slaughter and Jim Neidhart. Definitely two guys worthy of main event level programs in 1997. The whole thing ends with HHH twisting Shawn’s foot around like the Exorcist, which I assume was them getting their money's worth out of the prosthetic for the proposed King of the Ring match between Shawn and Bret Hart that didn’t end up happening
We get clips of the finish of the main event at Survivor Series, with Cornette selling it as Shawn not letting off the hold until after the bell, as if that dispels any controversy
Rock v Vader: Rock is still carrying around Steve Austin’s WWF Intercontinental title here, and Vader looks crazy fat. Dude was clearly packing in the pasta at this point. Austin shows up in a pickup truck as the bell sounds, driving it into the arena, and drinking a beer on the roof as a taunt to Rock. Despite that distraction, Rock still manages a sneak attack somehow, but Vader quickly fights him off. Vader unloads in the corner ahead of an avalanche, and he adds a pair of elbowdrops. Vader dives off the middle, but gets caught in a powerslam, and Rock adds a floatover DDT. The Nation add some cheap shots ahead of a bodyslam from Rock, and he unloads in the corner, but that backfires when Vader gets fired up. Rock goes to the eyes to avoid losing a slugfest, and he clotheslines Vader over the top, where Goldust attacks. Back in, Rock delivers a vertical suplex to set up an elbowdrop for two, but Vader bails to go after Goldust, and he gets counted out at 6:15. Not much as a match, but it did a great job adding some heat to two major feuds. If this were EWR, Sophie would be very pleased. ½*
Ken Shamrock video package. According to this, he has two moves: belly-to-belly suplex and anklelock. Actually, that sounds about right
WWF Light Heavyweight Title Tournament Semifinal Match: Scott Taylor v Brian Christopher: No match, as Kane shows up after Scott’s entrance, tombstones him, and Christopher picks up a trip to the finals via forfeit. Really going out of their way to make the tournament seem prestigious ahead of crowning the first champion, aren’t they?
Ahmed Johnson v Jeff Jarrett: Another one that doesn’t happen, as Jarrett refuses to wrestle since Ahmed ‘isn’t on (his) level.’ Well, he’s not wrong. Commissioner Slaughter responds by giving Jeff a more suitable opponent in Undertaker for In Your House. That felt really out of nowhere, and doing two non-matches in a row was poor booking. Sophie is definitely taking her approval away now
Triple H/Sgt. Slaughter video package. Using clips from World War II is hardly a way to make Sarge seem hip, guys. “Although Slaughter’s 49 years of age, and not in game shape…” notes Ross. Also not helping. And weren’t you guys just making fun of WCW for promoting over the hill/out of shape workers on their shows, like, two weeks ago?
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Jesse James and Billy Gunn v The Headbangers: The WWF Tag Team title is not on the line here. “The bell just sounding, you have not missed a thing here,” notes Ross, as we come back from commercial break. Pretty sure the same could be said even after the closing bell. Jesse and Mosh start, and why is Gunn wearing a Survivor Series t-shirt as his ring gear? Thrasher tags in to powerslam Jesse for two, so Billy takes a cheap shot, turning the tide. Gunn with a neckbreaker to set up a legdrop, but Road Dogg misses a 2nd rope legdrop, and Mosh gets the hot tag. He runs wild for all of five seconds before the LOD run in for the DQ at 2:52. Another nothing match, but at least it actually happened. ¼*
Jim Cornette brings Marc Mero and Sable out to discuss his upcoming match with Butterbean at In Your House. But instead of talking about that, Cornette would rather remind Marc that Sable is more popular than he is. Jim Cornette, putting his foot in his mouth? Well, I never! Mero tries to keep his cool, but then Sable drops one of Mero’s boxing gloves, and he loses his mind. He chews her out until she cries, as the crowd loudly chants for her, and Mero gets increasingly upset. This was a great segment, and Mero was fantastic here. Clearly he was taking notes while working the angle with DDP in ‘95
More clips of Bret Hart ‘submitting’ at Survivor Series. “Maybe that’ll end this controversy once and for all,” hopes Ross
Triple H v Jim Neidhart: Neidhart comes in hot, unloading in HHH in the corner, and using a cross corner whip to set up a clothesline. Jim with a backdrop, so Shawn Michaels distracts him, and Hunter is able to attack after Neidhart takes the bait. Corner whip, but Neidhart rebounds with a clothesline, and delivers a matslam. Pair of hairtosses follow, and a powerslam gets two, so Shawn hops up for another distraction. That allows HHH to grab a chair, and he blasts Jim with it for the pin at 2:31. Afterwards, DX deliver a beatdown, punctuating it by spraypainting ‘WCW’ on Neidhart’s back. “This is sure original,” quips Ross. The beating continues, but Ken Shamrock and Commissioner Slaughter run out to make the save to close the show. ¼*
BUExperience: We’re really in the Attitude Era now, and Vince Russo’s fingerprints are all over this, with multiple matches not happening, shock value storylines, and the matches that did happen all lasting all of a minute or two. Not the best episode.
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