WWE Elimination Chamber (May 2015)

Original Airdate: May 31, 2015

From Corpus Christi, Texas; Your Hosts are Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield, and Jerry Lawler

Opening WWE Tag Team Title Tag Team Elimination Chamber Match: The New Day v Tyson Kidd and Cesaro v The Lucha Dragons v The Prime Time Players v The Ascension v Los Matadores: This is the first ever tag team variation on the match, and it's Tornado rules - no tags necessary, even during the initial period. Lucha Dragons start with Ascension, and the Dragons use their speed to stick and move in the early going. Both Dragons end up on top of chambers with hopes for hitting dives, but the New Day end up crotching Kalisto to put a stop to that, as the period ends and Kidd/Cesaro enter the match. They immediately start snapping off their slick tandem stuff on everyone, and Cesaro superplexes Kalisto off of one of the chambers, with Kidd punctuating it with a springboard elbowdrop for two. Unfortunately for them, El Torito dives off of one of the chambers with a flying headscissors on Cesaro to end the party, as the Matadores enter the match. Meanwhile, Kalisto climbs the cage out to the dead center, and drops - taking out everyone in the process. Really, guys? You couldn't just, I dunno, move? It's not like he came out of nowhere! You all stood there staring up at him! That leaves most everyone down, but the Ascension get the best of it, and send the Matadores home with Fall of Man at 10:33. That's an awesome finisher name. The Dragons nail them with stereo missile dropkicks, but get caught in the Fall of Man as well at 11:24. They go after Cesaro and Kidd next, as the period ends, and the Prime Time Players enter. They get right into it with the Ascension, and Darren Young Gut Check's them out at 13:35. They're fresh, and easily dominate Cesaro/Kidd, but Cesaro manages to pop off a gorgeous dropkick on Young while he's perched on the top rope, and he gutwrench superplexes him down. The final period begins as New Day enter, and they have all three guys representing tonight. The Fabulous Blackbirds? They come in hot, but immediately run into a group suplex from the opposing teams, and Xavier Woods gets locked back in their chamber to even things out. Kofi Kingston takes the giant swing/dropkick combo, but Young capitalizes on Cesaro's dizziness, and schoolboys him at 18:34. Well, that was bound to happen. So, that leaves the New Day and the Players, and Woods is freed to give the champs an edge again. They destroy the challengers, but all end up missing charges in the corner, and Titus O'Neil nearly kills poor Big E with the cage. Inside, he goes for the kill with a lariat, as Young Gut Checks Kingston for two. Titus powerslams Big E for two, but gets overwhelmed in a triple team, and pinned at 23:50. This was much too long and complex for an opener, but had enough eye popping spots to make it engaging for casual viewers. * ½

WWE Diva's Title Triple Threat Match: Nikki Bella v Naomi v Paige: Both Brie Bella and Tamina are banned from ringside. These three look like a color progression chart, or something. Naomi pulls Nikki out to the floor and gives her a vicious toss into the announce table to get rid of her right off the bat, but misses a flying bodypress in after Paige. Paige stays on her with a dropkick and a sidekick, followed by a fallaway slam for two. Nikki comes back in with a kneeling facebuster on Paige for two, followed by a whiplash, but Naomi schoolgirls Nikki for two before she can cover, then covers Paige for two. Ugly botch follows as Nikki tries a springboard, and the others dump her to the outside to think about what she's done. Meanwhile, Naomi snap suplexes Paige, but Nikki stops a German superplex by powerbombing them both down for two. Rack Attack for Paige, but Naomi saves, and Paige locks Nikki in the PTO - saved by Naomi. Paige tries giving her an electric chair for that, but Naomi counters into an inverted rana - cool in theory, but ugly in delivery. That leaves Paige for dead, but Nikki sneaks up on Naomi with the Rack Attack to retain at 6:02. Kind of all over the place, but lots of hard work from all three, and genuine effort at doing unique stuff with the time they're given – even if those spots didn’t always work out so much in the end. * ¾

John Cena v Kevin Owens: Cena is the United States Champion and Owens is the NXT Champion, but this is non-title. Owens grabs a standing side-headlock out of the initial lockup, but runs into a shoulderblock as they criss cross. Owens is not pleased over that one, and decimates Cena with closed fists to put him in the corner, but a cross corner whip is reversed, and Cena bulldogs him. Kevin powers him down again in response, and this time is able to execute the corner whip - with authority. Chinlock, but Cena powers up into the FU, so Owens counters into a quick DDT for two. He keeps methodically hammering him, and egging him on, but John obliges with a schoolboy for two. Slugfest goes Cena's way with a jumping shoulderblock, but a bodypress is countered into a Samoan drop for two. Owens with a somersault bodyblock in the corner for two, and the taunts continue for 'John-boy.' Cena keeps coming anyway with another pair of jumping shoulderblocks, and this time he manages a side suplex to setup the Five Knuckle Shuffle. FU, but Owens counters into the Pop-Up Powerbomb for two. Owens is shocked, and tries a flying moonsault, but Cena dodges, and snaps off the FU, but it only gets two. Another slugfest goes Owens' way with a superkick, but he stops to mock Cena's shuffle, and gets trapped in an STF in the process. Cena lets off to avoid Owens getting the ropes, but as he tries dragging him back, Kevin pops up with an FU of his own for two! They really need to cool it with the replays here. Not literally every move needs a replay. Corner charge misses, allowing Cena to tornado DDT him for two (which gets yet another replay), and Cena hits a flying fameasser for two. FU, so Owens counters into a modified double-underhook powerbomb for two, but Cena catches him with a springboard stunner for two. Superplex, but Owens impressively counters into a fisherman's superplex on the way down for two, then quickly punctuates it with a swanton bomb for two. That was a tremendous sequence there. Cena fires back with a lariat, but he gets overzealous with a couple of encores, and Owens catches him with another Pop-Up Powerbomb for the pin at 19:54. And the crowd is SHOCKED. Well, if the goal here was to turn Owens into a legit star, I'd say that just went a damn long way in doing so. Very good match too, loaded with back-and-forth sequences, and given plenty of time to properly tell their story - with the announcers doing a great job at the crucial task of getting the story over on commentary. *** ½

Neville v Bo Dallas: Good thing this show is in Corpus Christi, or else Bo might become an unintentional babyface. They trade off on the mat to start, as the announcers still talk about the Cena/Owens match. It doesn't take long for Neville to start flying around, and he hits a flying moonsault press on the outside, then rolls Bo in for two. Bo begs off, but Neville ignores it and starts unloading kicks, but gets suckered, and dumped out of the ring. Dallas is on him with elbowsmashes on the outside, and a clothesline on the way back in is worth two. Headvise, but Neville powers up, so Bo punishes him with a series of knees. Cross corner charges misses, however, and Neville starts kicking away again. Standing shooting star press is worth two, but Bo catches him in a DDT for two, and grabs a headlock. Neville escapes with an enzuigiri, however, and the Red Arrow finishes at 8:55. After Cena/Owens, the crowd was predictably dead for this, and they didn't do a whole heck of a lot to change that here. ¼*

WWE Intercontinental Title Elimination Chamber Match: Bad News Barrett v Dolph Ziggler v Sheamus v Ryback v R-Truth v Mark Henry: Henry is a replacement for a injured Rusev, and this is for the vacant title. Barrett starts with Ziggler, as the announcers reel off the positively crazy stats of how many times these two have held the Intercontinental Title. Nine reigns between them sounds fucking insane to someone who remembers when it was considered a huge deal that Razor Ramon won the title for the third time twenty years ago. Dolph tries cradling him early, but gets pummeled in the corner, then trapped in a chinlock. Really dull opening period here, as they seem unsure of themselves, and fumbling around for direction. The period mercifully ends as R-Truth joins the fray, and the crowd is just dead here - sitting on their hands, and looking bored. Not that I blame them - this has been tremendously boring thus far. Barrett beats R-Truth up in his own chamber, then goes back to abusing Ziggler, but gets overwhelmed fighting a two front war, and R-Truth hits a 2^nd rope dropkick for two. Forward-falling sitout suplex and an enzuigiri setup a cross corner splash, but he walks into a scrapbuster for two. Ziggler schoolboys Barrett for two, but walks into a pair of superkicks for two, as even the announcers sound bored. And you've got to believe Michael Cole has a high tolerance. Barrett puts Ziggler through Mark Henry's chamber wall to bring him into the match early, and the referee doesn't really seem to give a shit. Henry splashes Barrett for two, as the clock runs down, and Ryback enters. He goes right for Henry, as I guess he's just in the match now, rules be damned. You know, the Parker Brothers took the time to think all this out. I think we should respect that. The referee could at least pretend to give a shit, even if just a little. Ryback unloads on everyone, and delivers a spinebuster on Barrett for two, but ends up taking a spill onto the steel platform. I'd say this match is falling apart, but frankly, it was never working to begin with. Even Sheamus looks like he's falling asleep in his chamber. Barrett eats the first fall via a Lie Detector from R-Truth at 11:15. They pair off like they're being booked by Jim Crow until the period expires, but now Sheamus' chamber won't open. I only care because I want this to end sooner than later. While Sheamus tries to get in, Ryback Shellshocks R-Truth at 13:55. They desperately need to call an audible to get this match off of life support, because the longer it goes on, the bigger train wreck it becomes. There's no turning it around at this point. Ryback with a hanging vertical suplex on Ziggler, but he walks into a superkick, as Sheamus finally escapes his chamber. What's the rush, boyo? Wait until it's down to one guy, and then come in and mop up. Fool! This is why Ziggler is a four time champion, and he isn't! Henry splashes his pale ass for two, but takes a Brogue Kick at 17:20. Sheamus keeps control by abusing Ziggler and Ryback with the cage, and a release vertical suplex on Dolph is worth two. Another go, but Ziggler counters into a cradle for two, then sunset flips him for two. Jumping DDT is worth two, and the fameasser follows, but Sheamus snaps off the Brogue Kick out of nowhere at 20:30. The crowd is chanting something I can't quite make out, but I think it might actually be 'this is hell.' Sheamus with a front-powerslam on Ryback for two, but Ryback blocks the Brogue with a pair of shoulderblocks, and a powerslam. Running powerslam, but Sheamus manages to duck out onto the platform to avoid the Meat Hook. Ryback follows with a Shell Shock out there, but Sheamus reverses, and rolls him back in to cover for two. That platform is clearly not doing them any favors, either, as Sheamus is nearly bleeding from the back from taking just a few bumps onto it. Sheamus goes for the kill, but Ryback randomly starts no-selling, and Shell Shocks him for the title at 25:11. This was tremendously boring stuff, and the crowd took a collective nap throughout. ¼*

Main Event: WWE World Heavyweight Title Match: Seth Rollins v Dean Ambrose: If Roman Reigns interferes, Ambrose is disqualified. Does that really need to be a stipulation? Isn't that just, I dunno, the basic rules?! They trade hammerlocks to start, and Seth does some super loud selling until he's able to bail to the floor for a conference with his goons. Back in, they try a test-of-strength, and Rollins takes a cheap shot, then pounds him in the corner. Ambrose manages a diving forearm for two, and a cross corner whip sets up a big chop. Dropkick on the ropes sets up a 2^nd rope guillotine legdrop for two, and Dean tries a side superplex, but gets crotched on the top, and caught in a tree of woe. Seth delivers a neat double stomp to knock him out of his tree for two, and tries a chinlock, but Dean escapes. Seth responds with a reverse STO into the turnbuckle for two, as they continue to lose the already bored crowd. Rollins with a pair of short-clotheslines, but Dean blocks a third, and they collide in the air as both guys try simultaneous bodypresses. Pinfall reversal sequence ends in Ambrose hitting a belly-to-back facebuster for two, but the goons pull Seth to floor to save him from a bulldog, so Ambrose reroutes, and nails him with a tope instead. Back in, Seth hooks a backslide for two, but gets caught using the ropes for leverage, and Dean rolls him up for two. Rollins drops him with a superkick for two, but Dean counters a powerbomb into a Cactus-clothesline. Seth responds by powerbombing him into the rail out there, and quickly rolls him in to score a two count off of it. Flying high knee is worth two, and a lifting-falling inverted DDT gets two. Corner splash misses, however, and Dean hits a tornado DDT for two. You know Vince must be going crazy on the headset, because Michael Cole basically says, 'one, two, HE GOT HI... no... no he didn't' here, verbatim. Dean with a dropkick on the ropes and a rebound clothesline for two, followed by a flying elbowsmash for two. Dirty Deeds, but the goons distract him, and Seth dropkicks him out to the floor, then quickly punctuates it with a tope. Back in, Rollins powerbombs him into the corner, but Dean rebounds at him with another clothesline. He goes up, but decides to dive out onto the goons instead, then hustles back in to dive at Seth, but ends up clipping the referee instead. Pedigree, but Ambrose counters into the Dirty Deeds, and a second referee rushes in to count the pin at 21:55. Unfortunately for him, the original referee comes to, and decides to disqualify Rollins, thus giving Ambrose the victory, but not the title. The crowd was already numbed by the boring Chamber match, and they just weren't giving them much to work with before the last few minutes here. I like both guys, but they just weren't clicking tonight, and the terrible ending didn't help matters any. * ¾

BUExperience: While there are a couple of decent matches here, there’s only one standout in Cena/Owens, and I have a feeling they’ll top that in the rematches later on anyway. Nothing else here is worth going out of your way to see, however.

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