WWE Tables, Ladders, and Chairs (December 2015)

Original Airdate: December 13, 2015

From Boston, Massachusetts; Your Hosts are Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield, and Jerry Lawler

Opening WWE Tag Team Title Triple Threat Ladder Match: The New Day v The Usos v The Lucha Dragons: There's no tags in and out here, and all six men are legal - it's just a mêlée. Immediately, one member of each team bails to the floor to fetch ladders, and New Day manages to control first, setting their ladder up. Both challengers cut them off, leading to a neat bit of choreography when Kofi Kingston and Kalisto each try a springboard dive onto the ladder from opposite sides of the ring - leaving both racing up on opposite sides. That's a cool spot, but man, they don't even build up to stuff anymore at all, do they? We're less than two minutes into the bout, and they're already doing crazy dives onto the ladder, and fighting over climb attempts. But hey, it's an opener, so it's forgivable. The Dragons clean house, but stupidly opt to dive onto New Day with stereo flying moonsaults on the floor instead of climbing. The Usos then act equally stupid - entering the vacant ring and grabbing the perfectly setup ladder to throw out at the other teams, instead of, you know, climbing it and winning the title. I know this will make me sound like an old man, but fuck it, because this is something that really irks me about today’s style. In the old school ladder matches, it seemed like they were fighting to win the title as their main objective, with the ladder there to aid them in their goal. And if it gets used as a weapon along the way, or gets used to perform some insane high spots, hey, all the better. But today, it's almost like the guys (by which I mean the characters they are playing) are more interested in doing crazy spots, and if they happen to win along the way, all the better. I know kayfabe is long, long dead, and that everyone knows its a work anyway, but it's a major problem with the product right now - and not just in ladder matches. Like, I know Goodfellas is a 'work' too, but the movie would've sucked if Pesci kept winking at the camera in the middle of his rampages, and then asked Frank Vincent to position himself for a springboard rana off a barstool. Anyway, the Usos and the Dragons all climb at the same time to trigger a wild bump where Sin Cara somersault inverted DDTs Jimmy Uso off a ladder, but Xavier Woods throws his trombone at him to prevent a climb, and Kofi snags the gold at 17:46. Who throws a trombone? Honestly? It was entertaining, but more in the style of Cirque du Soleil than Shawn versus Razor. **

Ryback v Rusev: The Bulgarian Bon-Bon attacks at the bell, and wallops him with forearms, but gets head faked while trying a clothesline, and knocked to the outside. Ryback knocks him into the rail out there, then rolls him in for a flying axehandle, followed by a sloppy press-slam. He adds a splash for two, but a ten-punch in the corner gets countered with a stungun. Lana's hair looks weird tonight, and I don't dig it. Kinda like Jennifer Aniston in The One with the Flashback. Rusev with a short-clothesline, followed by a chinlock, but Ryback escapes, and wins a fight over a vertical suplex. Ryback throws shoulderblocks, and a 2^nd rope dropkick is worth two. Flying bodypress gets two, but Viktor Krum bails to dodge the Meat Hook. He takes a walk with Lana, but Ryback drags him back, so Lana feigns injury, and Viktor superkicks him for two. Accolade, so Ryback counters to the ShellShock, but Rusev kicks him in the head, and the Accolade finishes at 7:56. Decent power match, actually. * ¼

WWE United States Title Chairs Match: Alberto Del Rio v Jack Swagger: Second year in a row Swagger is challenging for the US Title on this show. There are a ton of empty chairs scattered all around ringside for this one. Official prediction: we will be seeing a Chair Match at WrestleMania as an excuse for all the empty chairs in Dallas. Zeb Colter is not here tonight, but adds his thoughts via Twitter. It's kinda hard to be cryptic and use emoticons at the same time, if you ask me. Both guys grab chairs at the bell, and immediately brawl to the floor, where Swagger smashes the champs face onto a chair about a dozen times. Inside, Jack tries the Swagger Bomb, but Del Rio blocks with a chair for two, then punts him in the kidney. He unloads with a chair in the corner, and a double-knee backbreaker gets two. More chair shots to the back, but Swagger blocks a double-stomp with a chair of his own, and adds a few clotheslines. Cross corner clothesline and a short-arm version setup another Swagger Bomb, but Del Rio blocks again, and hits a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker for two. The champ tosses him out to the floor and covers him in a pile of chairs, then rolls him in and gets a two count out of it. Cross armbreaker, but Swagger sends him into the post to block, and hooks a schoolboy for two. Jack whacks him with a chair, and grabs a chair-assisted Patriot Lock, but Del Rio gets the... apron... instead of the ropes. Look, I'm not really sure how they do it in Mexico, but that's not how we play it in the US, pal. Swagger with a belly-to-belly suplex, and he finally hits the Swagger Bomb, but it only gets two. Sucks to be you, Jack. He brings a bunch of chairs into the ring to finish Alberto off good, but a superplex onto the pile gets blocked, and Del Rio manages a cross armbreaker in the corner. That leaves the challenger in a tree of woe, and Del Rio brings him down with a flying double stomp onto a pile of chairs at 11:12. Cool finish, though Del Rio looked like he messed up his ankle a bit doing it. * ½

Eight-Man Tag Team Elimination Tables Match: The Wyatt Family v The ECW Originals: Like the opener, there are no tags necessary here, and all eight men are in the ring at the same time. Big brawl to start (duh), with the ECW crew using weapons to control. Braun Strowman turns that around by simply being Braun Strowman, as I wonder how long it'll take them to build him up for the eventual epic match with Brock? Though, the booking has been so poor lately that I doubt it'll even happen. Erick Rowan tries putting D-Von Dudley through a table with a flying splash, but Rhyno shoves him off the top rope, and Tommy Dreamer drops him with a DDT before the Dudley Boyz send him home with a Death Drop through a table at 4:10. The flurry doesn't last for the ECW crew, however, as Rhyno gets slammed by Luke Harper, and senton splashed by Bray Wyatt, then put through a table at 6:25. The rest of the Originals are busy dukeing it out with Strowman on the floor, but D-Von rushes in to go at Harper, and the Boyz hit him with a flying clothesline/electric chair combo. D-Von goes for Bray next, but misses the crab walk as he's busy setting up a table, and Wyatt puts him through it with a uranage at 8:26. With only two Originals left, the ECW boys grab Singapore canes to even the odds, but can't put any Wyatt's through tables. They busy themselves with neutralizing Strowman, but fail to watch out for Harper, and he puts Dreamer through a table with a tope at 10:41. That leaves Bubba Dudley alone against three men, and he fights valiantly with his cane (like most old men tend to do, I suppose), but eats a chokeslam through a table from Strowman at 12:30. Just a brawl. Wasn't really my thing, but it wasn't horrible. ½*

WWE Intercontinental Title Match: Kevin Owens v Dean Ambrose: Dean peppers him with jabs to start, but Owens blocks a bulldog, and clotheslines him down from behind. Chinlock, but Dean escapes with more punches, so Kevin overhead suplexes him for two. Seated clothesline gets two, and it's back to the chinlock. What's his problem tonight? Ambrose side suplexes his way out, but Kevin blocks the Dirty Deeds, so Dean clotheslines him over the top instead. He follows him out with a tope, but eats a fallaway slam onto the rail as they brawl, and Owen punctuates it with a senton splash out there before leaving Dean for dead to get counted out. Ambrose beats it in, so Owens looks to punish him with another senton, but Dean uses his knees to block. Dean throws the rebound clothesline at him, but a flying elbowsmash gets countered with a well executed release German suplex. Ambrose manages to dodge a somersault bodyblock in the corner, however, and he hits the flying elbowsmash for two. Nice sequence there. Superplex, but Owens counters with a rolling fireman's carry slam off the top rope for two, only for Ambrose to counter the Pop-Up Powerbomb with the Dirty Deeds for two - Kevin in the ropes to break the count. Owens throws a superkick for two, but another try at the Pop-Up Powerbomb is countered with a rana into a cradle to crown a new champion at 9:52. A good modern match, but with old school sensibilities - a perfect combination. ** ¾

WWE Diva's Title Match: Charlotte v Paige: Paige refuses a handshake at the bell, so Charlotte beats her for it in the corner, while mocking her. Paige turns it around with some mud hole stomping in the corner, followed by a superkick to trigger a Flair flop for two. Charlotte bails to the floor to beg off, as Ric Flair gets to play JJ Dillon to help her dodge an attack, and take control. Charlotte with a series of kneedrops for two, and a neckbreaker gets two. Chinlock wears Paige down for a two count, and a kneedrop (complete with pulled down pad) gets two. Some strutting allows Paige to grab a sleeper, but Charlotte escapes, and goes after the leg - clipping it, then wrapping it around the post. Paige manages to reverse her into the post to setup a figure four of her own, but Charlotte reverses, and big boots her challenger down. Flying bodypress gets two for the champion, and she starts throwing chops, but Paige counters a backslide with a fisherwoman's suplex for two. Running kneesmash, but Charlotte counters with a cradle DDT for two, but Paige schoolgirls her for two. Ram-Paige gets two when Ric puts his daughter in the ropes, and Paige is shocked. SHOCKED. Really? You're shocked that RIC FLAIR would cheat? The guy they used to call 'the dirtiest player in the game?' Really? Anyway, as Paige deals with her mind exploding, Charlotte stunguns her into an exposed turnbuckle to retain at 10:38. This was basically just Charlotte doing an impression of her father for the entire match - which is entertaining in its way, but certainly not something I want to see on a regular basis, or as the main aspect of the character. *

Main Event: WWE World Heavyweight Title Tables, Ladders, and Chairs Match: Sheamus v Roman Reigns: Sheamus tries to charge at the bell, but gets destroyed in a slugfest. To the floor, Sheamus throws a ladder at his challenger, but ends up getting backdropped over the rail, and nailed with a short-clothesline. They fight over to the entrance area for Reigns to toss him into a stack of tables, ladders, and chairs, but a powerbomb through a table gets countered with a backdrop. Sheamus follows up with a falcon arrow through another table, then leaves him for dead to go try and climb for the belt. He sets up the ladder, but Roman rushes in and tips it over before he can grab it. What a little jerk! Sheamus throws a ladder at him on the floor as punishment, then beats him with a chair, but gets reversed into the steps. Hey! Hey! This isn't 2014! It's not 'Tables, Ladders, Chairs, and Stairs!' Stop being a dick! Drive-By, but Sheamus blocks, and unloads with a chair again. White Noise through a table follows, but Reigns just refuses to die, and holds the champs ankle to prevent him from climbing back in and going for the belt. Sheamus punishes him with another White Noise, this time on a ladder, but Reigns manages to counter with a slam onto the ladder. Roman with a jumping clothesline that sends Sheamus to the outside, but instead of capitalizing by climbing for the belt, the moron follows him to the floor for a springboard chair shot. Even Lex Luger would've just went for it there. Back in, Superman Punch time, but Sheamus counters with the Irish Curse. They fight out onto the apron, which ends in Reigns dropping him like a Samoan through a ladder. That kills Sheamus dead, so Roman sets up another ladder and climbs, but takes too long, and Sheamus pulls him off. Powerbomb, but Roman counters with the Superman Punch. He climbs, but the champ tips the ladder to save. Sheamus climbs, and quite nearly gets the strap, but Reigns pops up the ladder with a Superman Punch to knock him off! He climbs, but now the League of Nations runs in, and beat Roman down - allowing Sheamus to hit the Brogue Kick, and then climb for the gold at 23:57. Afterwards, Reigns absolutely loses his shit, and beats up the League in violent fashion until Triple H comes down to try and calm him down. That earns him an ass kicking as well, as Reigns just goes on a full on rampage to close the show. As for the match, like, eighty percent of it didn't even take place inside of the ring, but it was entertaining, and they actually looked like they wanted to fight and win, and not just do eye-popping spots for the sake of doing eye-popping spots. Of course, it was really just setup for the rampage after the match, all leading to the big angle the following night on RAW, when Reigns finally got the belt. ** ¼

BUExperience: I wouldn’t call this a ‘bad show’ by any means, but there were no standout matches, and given that the main event was basically nothing more than a tease for their ratings grab the next night, it doesn’t even really have any historical significance either.

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