WWF at Arrowhead Pond (March 3, 1994)

 

Original Airdate: March 3, 1994

From Anaheim, California 

Opening Match: The Heavenly Bodies v The Bushwhackers: The Bodies are the SMW Tag Team champions here, but those belts aren't on the line, and they don’t have them with them anyway. The Bodies attack to kickstart things, but the Bushwhackers block a whip into one another, then hit them with stereo atomic drops, and a tandem clothesline to clean house. Lots of stalling from there, until the heels finally get control on Luke. They work him over, until Butch is able to catch the hot tag, and he quickly puts Tom Prichard away with a sunset flip at 9:47. DUD

Mixed Tag Team Match: Bam Bam Bigelow and Luna Vachon v Doink the Clown and Dink: They don’t even have a proper entrance set here, with guys just coming out of the hockey barricades. Doink and Dink have Rhonda Shear in their corner for this. The heels won’t allow the clowns to get into the ring, so Dink sneaks in from behind, and trips Bigelow up. The dust settles on Luna and Dink, and Luna misses a splash. Tags, and Bigelow hits Doink with an enzuigiri, but eats a boot while charging in the corner, and Doink delivers a facebuster before clotheslining Bam Bam over the top. Bigelow charges back in, so Doink hooks a drop-toehold, and traps him on the mat in a stepover-toehold. Doink misses a big charge and goes flying out of the ring, and Bam Bam follows to feed him the steps. Dink comes in to try and take on Bam Bam himself, but Bigelow misses a charge, so Luna tries, but wipes out as well. All that allows Doink to recover, and he uses a slingshot sunset flip for two. A reversal sequence ends in Doink slugging at him, but a whip into the ropes backfires when Dink gets knocked to the floor. Doink DDTs Bam Bam before he notices that his little buddy is dead, and Dink gets carried out by officials to go to the medical station. Hopefully Hulk Hogan is waiting there. That distraction allows Bigelow to nail Doink, and the heels go to work, even if Luna can’t technically tag in. The referee gets bumped as Bam Bam hits a front-powerslam, so Luna makes the count herself, and Bigelow stupidly thinks that counts. Just then, Dink runs back out, and he hits Bam Bam with a low blow - allowing Doink to schoolboy at 11:17. I enjoyed their WrestleMania match too, and while this hit a lot of the same beats, I appreciate that it wasn’t the exact same match. * ¾ 

WWF Tag Team Title Match: The Quebecers v 1-2-3 Kid and Jim Powers: Jacques starts with Jim, but tries to cheat, so Kid comes in, and the challengers clean house. Gosh, looking at this building, you’d never think they’d hold several WrestleManias in it. Not that it’s a bad building, but the way it was set up for this live event, it looks like a really large high school gymnasium. The dust settles back on Jacques and Jim, and Powers wins a criss cross by blocking a monkey flip. Tag to Kid for a flying axehandle, and Kid grabs a wristlock from there. The heels manage to sucker him, and that’s enough to turn the tide. The champs go to work, and Kid is bumping around and selling all over the place. The Quebecers collide on a double team to allow the hot tag to Powers, but it’s fucking Jim Powers, so that doesn’t last long before they put him away with a combo at 10:19. ¾*

Men on a Mission v Yokozuna and Bastion Booger: Kind of odd that they’re wasting the reigning WWF Champion on this match, during the build up to WrestleMania, no less. Mo and Booger begin, and there’s stalling. Booger rakes the eyes, and manages to land a backelbow, but a criss cross allows Mo a bodypress for two. That whole sequence was crazy sloppy. Mo grabs a wristlock before tagging to Mabel, who clubs on Bastion with forearms. Back to Mo, but Booger manages to maneuver him into the heel corner, and Yokozuna tags in. He puts the hurt on Mo, but an elbowdrop misses, and Mo unloads. Mo hits a knee while charging in the corner, however, and Yokozuna chokes him down. Yokozuna uses a cross corner whip to set up an avalanche, but Mo sidesteps, and tags. That gives us a fat showdown, and Mabel gets the better of it, with Yokozuna ending up on the outside. Yokozuna grabs a chair and beats the absolute piss out of Mabel with it while the referee isn’t looking, and that’s enough to turn the tide. What is with this venue and members of the Anoa’i family trying to murder dudes with chairs? The heels go to work, and why the hell is Mabel taking the heat segment? This whole match feels like it was set up to get to Mabel catching a hot tag, and having a showdown with Yokozuna. Anyway, Yokozuna misses a splash, allowing Mo to catch the tag, and Roseanne Barr the door! In the chaos, Yokozuna catches Mo with a belly-to-belly suplex for the pin at 8:58. This wasn’t as bad as you’d expect, and was pretty decent, actually. ¾*

The Smoking Gunns v Samu and Tonga Kid: Kid is subbing for Fatu here, and Rhonda Shear acts as the guest ring announcer. Kid is such a dead ringer for Fatu that they could have just said it was him and no one would have noticed anyway. Billy Gunn starts with Samu, and dominates. Tag to Bart Gunn, and the Gunns dominate things with quick tags, working the arm. The heels eventually manage to drop Bart outside of the ring, and that allows them to turn the tide. They cut the ring in half, until Bart fights off a double team, and makes the tag. The Gunns quickly get into trouble, however, and Roseanne Barr the door! Bart gets isolated again, but Billy gets to the top rope, and dives with a flying sunset flip at 13:37. Very basic. ½*

Main Event: Bret Hart and Lex Luger v Irwin R. Schyster and Owen Hart: Lex and Irwin start, and Luger knocks him around. A clothesline gets two, and Lex passes to Bret, but Schyster ducks away before he can grab him. He tags to Owen after some obligatory stalling, and Bret gets a quick waistlock takedown, but Owen has the ropes. Bret tries for a second takedown, but Owen drops down this time, sending the Hitman out of the ring. Bret dusts himself off and takes Owen to the mat in a side-headlock, but Owen reverses. Bret counters to a headscissors, but Owen kips up to escape. They trade hammerlocks from there, with Bret getting control of it on the mat, but Owen manages to counter to a wristlock. Bret reverses, so Owen uses the ropes to slingshot, and then hiptosses the Hitman. Elbowdrop, but Bret moves, and he armdrags Owen into an armbar. Owen forces a criss cross, but gets hiptossed, and Bret goes back to the armbar from there. Owen escapes, so Bret tries a backbreaker, but Owen blocks, and goes to the eyes. That allows Owen a headbutt, and he turnbuckle smashes the Hitman. Owen tries a cross corner whip, but Bret blocks, and rolls him up for two. A reversal sequence ends in Owen holding an armbar, but Bret gets into the ropes, and schoolboys for two, so Owen tags out, ending the fun. Schyster hammers Bret with rights, but misses a clothesline, and Bret bodypresses him for two. Tag to Luger for a 2nd rope axehandle, and he holds IRS in an armbar from there. Schyster manages to whip him into the ropes to escape, and Owen throws a cheap shot from the apron. That allows Schyster an atomic drop, and Lex takes a spill to the outside, where Owen is ready to attack. The heels work Luger over, until he slips away from IRS, and Bret gets the tag. Bret hits Schyster with a Russian legsweep right away, so Owen comes in, but Bret cuts him off with an inverted atomic drop. Bret hooks Schyster in a small package for two, and a backbreaker sets up the Sharpshooter. That draws Owen in again, and he nails Bret with Schyster’s briefcase to break the hold. That leaves both men looking up at the lights, but Bret tags first, and Luger quickly schoolboys IRS for the pin at 17:23. That ending felt out of nowhere. The overall match was only okay, but the Hart/Hart sequences were lyrical, and it’s no wonder they put on the greatest match ever contested later that same month. **

BUExperience: A pretty rare all tag team card here, as they’re clearly booking on autopilot during the ramp up to WrestleMania X. This wasn’t a bad house show, though not a notable one, either.

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