Chair Shots and Miscarriages of Justice: WWE Money in the Bank 2016

CHAIR SHOTS AND MISCARRIAGES OF JUSTICE

WWE Money in the Bank 2016

By: Double M

[Hit The Million Dollar Man’s music]. End intro let’s roll.

BEST MATCH:
The Money in the Bank Ladder Match. Ladder matches and any “singles match” involving 3 or more competitors [Triple Threat, Fatal 4-Way] have been, pardon the phrase, money as of late. The variety of talent and styles has provided fantastic viewing and action and at Money in the Bank the briefcase ladder match did not disappoint. From the Kevin Owens bowling ball party to the double feature Cesaro’s Uppercut Train and Spin ending with Chris Jericho going head first into the ladder. Tough couple of events for Mr. Drink-It- In, 69 tacs thanks to Dean Ambrose at Extreme Rules and a toss head first into ladders at M.I.T.B. We’re taking bets on what happens to him at Battleground. Speaking of head shots how viscous were those 3 ladder head shots he took? Not to be out done Sammy Zayn breaking Kevin Owens in half with a suplex on the end of the ladder, only to have the favor returned by Owens with a power bomb that would’ve had Jim Ross all fired up. Add The Tower of Terror with all 6 guys beating the hell out of each for a little unique flare and this match was exactly the war of attrition JBL described it to be. In the end it’s the Lunatic Fringe getting the big reward, but any of the 6 guys involved deserved the win after a match like that.

WORST MATCH:
Baron Corbin/ Dolph Ziggler [again], Dana Brooke & Charlotte/ Natalya & Becky Lynch, Sheamus/ Apollo Crews, Rusev/ Titus O’ Neill. I’ll make this short and sweet. Bad timings, no energy, boring, all these matches did was give us time for a bathroom break.

MOST DISAPPOINTING MOMENT:
The Club’s interference. The New Era vs. The Franchise, The Phenomenal One vs. Hustle. Loyalty. Respect., AJ Styles vs. John Cena a ‘once in a lifetime’ match the world has been waiting for. It was a great story, the arrogance and quickness of Styles matched by Cena’s endurance. Finisher’s, reversals, blocks, taunts, kickouts and fierce intensity…… and then The Club dropped The Magic Killer with the referee ko’d. Yes I know we all knew it would happen, call it naivety in this ‘New Era’ that we’d see The Club show up after the match for a good-ol’ fashioned beatdown either way. Great match ruined like oatmeal cookies with raisins.

BEST MOMENT:
Dean Ambrose cashing in his M.I.T.B. contract. As the saying goes: “vengeance is dish best served cold.” Rollins derailed Ambrose with the curb stomp in route to winning the WWE title a couple years ago, only proper the commandant of the Ambrose Asylum takes out Rollins with the briefcase moments after completing his comeback winning the WWE title. Dean Ambrose had come up short in quite a few events at the end of 2015 and early in 2016, he played his role well, and is a different type of crazy. Great to see the company reward someone out of the box with, what I hope will be a good title run.

PARTING SHOTS:
-Enzo seriously no more caffeine, energy shots/ drinks, injections, speed gotta lay off G your eyes are going to fall out and we don’t... need to see... that.
-Solid main event between Seth Rollins and Roman Reigns. Story well told with Reigns controlling much of the match taking advantage of Rollins’ ring rust, transitioning into Rollins picking up steam to the win. I’ve heard rumors of a Triple Threat between the former Shield members, this locks it up in my mind.
-Dear God are we done with Dolph Ziggler v. Baron Corbin and any kind of match involving Charlotte and Natalya? Corbin would be great to watch if it didn’t take him forever and a day for him to execute a maneuver, I swear you could time him with an hourglass. Ziggler continues his impersonation of HBK so we’ll just leave that there. The women’s division, after coming back with a vengeance, has cooled off in a hurry thanks to this little feud. It’s played out and boring as hell, time to move on.
-Cross promo idea: Next time Sheamus comes out just as the lights go back to normal the Ghostbusters blast him with a 4 proton-pack- attack.
-Reports indicate the Wyatt Family took a wrong turn off the Mississippi and down a stream into a remote part of West Virginia, possibly Ohio.

Angry Rating Scale: 7.

~Double M