WWF Monday Night RAW (January 29, 1996)

Original Airdate: January 29, 1996 (taped January 22)

From Stockton, California; Your Hosts are Vince McMahon and Jerry Lawler. What’s up with the Tonight Show style live band they have set up by the entrance for this taping cycle?

Diesel v Davey Boy Smith: Some guy in the crowd is holding up a 'RAW is WAR' sign, about a year ahead of schedule. I'll bet there are no less than a dozen YouTube conspiracy theory videos about it. Diesel goes to town in the corner to start, as the crowd gets distracted by something going on in the stands. Probably a fight, or something. That used to happen so often in the 90s, but you almost never see it anymore. Guess that's what happens when the audience shifts from rowdy college kids to families. Diesel clotheslines Bulldog over the top, but Davey sweeps him from out there, and rams the leg into the post. Back in, Smith works the leg, and Diesel actually does a great job of selling it. His selling really improved following the match with Hart at Survivor Series. Yokozuna waddles out as Smith works a half-crab, and he takes a cheap shot at Big Daddy Cool behind the referee's back. Diesel ends up on the outside, allowing Davey to expose a top turnbuckle as the referee is busy counting, but he gets reversed into it. Diesel quickly adds a snake-eyes into the exposed buckle, so Yoko runs (well...) in - only to accidentally hit Bulldog with a legdrop! That allows Diesel to cover, and Davey's done at 6:09. This was like a compact version of the match they had at In Your House IV. And give Diesel credit, he sells the leg all the way up the aisle. ½*

Dok Hendrix is in his man cave, talking about In Your House. Even as a huge mark, and even with a card full of logical pairings announced, I remember not being especially hyped up about this one as a kid. He also announces that Turner Broadcasting has been threatening the WWF with legal action over the Billionaire Ted skits (with Eric Bischoff referred to as a 'Turner Broadcasting System Official,' which had to sting), but that the WWF won't stand down to those big bullies. They show a copy of the letter Bischoff sent to McMahon, although given the size and quality of most screens in 1996, I doubt anyone could actually read it. Even today, you really have to squint. It's worth losing a bit of eyesight for though, as Bischoff is pretty hilariously snarky in it


And speaking of Billionaire Ted, the latest skit sees Ted, Nacho Man, and Huckster (complete with walker) hold a press conference to announce that, despite popular belief, Ted is not a hillbilly! He also fields questions from reporters about whether or not he's trying to put the WWF out of business, which is where this stuff really goes off the rails. The first few skits were funny, and when they poke fun at the product its still funny (like Huckster telling Nacho that he'll be going over him because it's 'in his contract that he never loses'), but whenever they veer into the stuff like network placement and undercutting ad rates, it just comes off like increasingly desperate bellyaching on the WWFs part. And don't even get me started on the bits where they attack Ted for being 'greedy,' and 'not caring about the fans,' as if the WWF was a partnership between Mother Theresa, the Dalai Lama, and Gandhi

The Bodydonnas v The Godwinns: Sunny was getting better looking by the day at this point. This is the debut of Dennis Knight as Phineas, Henry Godwinn's cousin. Skip starts with Henry, and nearly gets press-slammed, but Zip comes in with a drop-toehold to save. I mean, not really, because it still causes Henry to drop Skip the same distance, but that's wrestling logic for you. If you crash to the mat, but not on your opponents terms, then it obviously doesn't hurt. The Bodydonnas briefly cut the ring in half on Henry, as Sunny messes with Hillbilly Jim on the outside. Not that it matters, as Henry just kind of gets the tag to Phineas, and the Slop Drop finishes Skip at 2:01. Just basically a quick introduction to the new Phineas character, and little else. I'm surprised they sacrificed the Bodydonnas for this, as opposed to some random jobbers. Were Techno Team 2000 not getting paid anymore? Afterwards, the Godwinns basically try and rape Sunny, but luckily she gets away. ¼*

Next week, Bret Hart defends the WWF Title against Undertaker, in a re-match from the Royal Rumble

We take a look back at Vader's path of destruction at both the Rumble and last weeks show, which led to his suspension after a whole two days in the promotion. Vince's narration is somehow even more over the top than his live calls. Jim Cornette is protesting Vader's suspension, however, with Clarence Mason ready to file a lawsuit if he's not reinstated

Vince McMahon brings out Roddy Piper as a surprise replacement for President Gorilla Monsoon, until Monsoon recovers. Lucky he was hanging out backstage at the taping, I guess. I mean, it works on TV, but I have no idea how they sold this shit to the live crowd with a straight face. Also, for those keeping track, WCW is shit because they only use ex-WWF guys, and their roster is all old people. Not like the WWF, who bring you homegrown stars like Vader, and fresh up-and-comers like Roddy Piper! Don't get me wrong, both were good additions, but the hypocrisy is dizzying. Piper has a lot of fun with this, especially when teasing Vince about being his boss now

Mankind teaser!

Shawn Michaels v Yokozuna: The middle aged women in the crowd are just losing their shit for Shawn here. Yokozuna knocks him around in the early going, so Shawn jiggles the big guys ass, and knocks him to the outside with a series of right hands. Yeah, I'm pretty sure I've seen Keith Thurman or Deontay Wilder use that strategy before too. Anyway, that's enough to get Jim Cornette to bring Owen Hart out to ringside, but Shawn stays on Yokozuna with a flying moonsault press for two. Yoko manages to reverse a cross corner whip, however, and Shawn flips to the floor, where Owen is ready and waiting! Michaels takes a beating out there, but beats the count in, where Yokozuna grounds him in a nervehold. Shawn's selling actually makes the hold a lot more tolerable than most guys who took it, and he's a master of timing his hope spots. Yokozuna tries a legdrop, but Michaels rolls out of the way, only to have the same thing happen to him on a flying splash. A flying axehandle doesn't go much better, as Yokozuna catches him, and signals Owen in as Cornette distracts the referee. Hart charges, but ends up hitting Yokozuna by accident, and Shawn capitalizes on the error with the Superkick at 11:02. Shawn actually managed to pull a fairly decent match out of Yokozuna at this stage in the big mans career, which is no small feat. Or legs. Or butt. Or stomach. Afterwards, Camp Cornette tease dissention, with Davey Boy Smith having to run out and play peacemaker. They focus their aggression on Michaels, but Diesel runs out to back him up, and they retreat. Not sure why, you're still up four guys to two. At ringside, McMahon grabs Cornette, and immediately starts stirring the pot, but Jim quickly changes the subject by challenging Shawn and Diesel to face his guys in tag action next week - which they accept. Shawn and Diesel being goofy together is fun, as usual. * ½

BUExperience: Other than the Piper surprise, there wasn’t a whole lot of notable stuff going on, or notably good matches, but the episode was entertaining nonetheless. Hardly a homerun, but a solid single.

Monday Night Wars Rating Chart

	1/29/96
Show	RAW	Nitro
Rating	2.4	2.8
Total Wins	9	9
Win Streak		1
Better Show (as of 1/22)	3	13