WWE Money in the Bank (July 2010)

Original Airdate: July 18, 2010

 

From Kansas City, Missouri; Your Hosts are Michael Cole, Matt Striker, and Jerry Lawler

 

Opening Money in the Bank Ladder Match: Big Show v Kane v Christian v Matt Hardy v Cody Rhodes v Kofi Kingston v Dolph Ziggler v Drew McIntyre: Winner gets a contract for a World Heavyweight title match. There are ladders in the ring right at the bell, which is a weird choice. Show and Kane clean house to start, and then fight it out, won by Show. He goes for a climb, but the ladder isn’t strong enough to support him, and literally falls apart when he tries. That allows a bunch of guys to run in on him, but Show fights them all off with ease, and goes to the outside to get a better ladder. He gets jumped by the entire field (save Kane) out there, however, and this time they’re able to overwhelm him for a trip into the steps. Drew gets the better end of the resulting brawl, and he brings a ladder in to climb, but Hardy cuts him off. Hardy dumps him to the outside and makes his own climb (to a huge reaction), but Christian cuts it off. He climbs, but Matt yanks him off, and they slug it out. That allows Cody to sneak by for a climb, but Kofi cuts him off. He climbs, but Ziggler cuts him off. He climbs, but Christian cuts him off. Okay, let’s move on. Christian nearly gets the case after hiptossing Dolph off of the ladder, but Matt tips him before he can grab it. Kane comes in to try a double chokeslam on them, so Christian and Hardy team up to tandem DDT him, and they sandwich him between a pair of ladders next. Hardy tries a Twist of Fate on Christian, but gets dropped on a ladder as a block. Christian climbs, but Cody tips him, and Christian takes a bump to the outside - taking Show out on the way down! Cody climbs, but Hardy meets him at the top for a slugfest - only for Drew to tip them both over, and then chuck them to the outside via the post. Drew climbs, but Dolph hooks his leg to block, so Drew posts him as well. Unfortunately for him, Kane pulls him out of the ring before he can climb, so Kofi baseball slides a ladder into Kane’s face out there. Kofi puts Drew on an announce table and dive from the ladder with a flying Boom Drop to drive him through it, but meanwhile Ziggler is climbing, and nearly gets the case before Show violently pulls him down for a chokeslam. Christian and Hardy rush him with a ladder, but Show fights both off, and splashes them under a ladder for good measure. Show goes to the outside and finds a reinforced ladder the size of a pickup truck, but the thing is so darned big that he can’t get it into the ring. Not sure if that was intentional or not, but it worked regardless. Show finally gets it set up, and he climbs, but Cody bashes him in the leg with another ladder to stop the effort. Cody climbs, but Dolph pulls him off with an electric chair, and he makes his own climb, but he’s so slow that I’m pretty sure a snail could cut him off. Kofi springboards onto the ladder to try and steal the case, so Show goes to pull him off, but Kingston counters with a DDT. Kofi climbs, but Cody leaps with a missile dropkick to block him off, and he gives Kingston a Cross Rhodes on a ladder. Cody climbs, but Ziggler pulls him off, and uses a Zig Zag into the ladder. Show climbs, but his bad leg is slowing him down, and Kane is able to tip him over the top! The other guys rush over to bury Show under a pile of ladders out there, and they head in so they can all try climbing. Kane puts a stop to that like he’s swatting mosquitoes at a beach, and then decides to go on a rampage out on the floor. Cody gets rammed into an armored truck stationed near the entrance, but gets bashed by Christian and Hardy before he can climb. They climb, and it’s a slugfest at the top, ending in both guys taking the big spill down to the canvas. Drew slides in to go for a robbery, but Kane meets him at the top, and he shoves McIntyre off. That allows Kane a clear path, and he grabs the case at 26:16. Suffered from the usual ‘two guys work, everyone else naps’ formatting issues, but it was a lot more fun than I was expecting, even if it was way too long for its own good. ** ½

 

WWE Divas Title Match: Alicia Fox v Eve Torres: They do a nice battle over the initial lockup, won by Eve. Torres grabs a standing side-headlock, and a shoulderblock gets her two after Fox forces a criss cross. Somersault cradle for two, and a sunset cradle is worth two. Dropkick finds the mark, but Fox blocks a tornado DDT, and Eve bails. Fox follows to drop her challenger across the apron, and she drags her into the ring by the hair to cover for two. Fox works the back, and a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker gets her two. Bow-and-arrow follows, but Eve escapes, and throws a bodypress for two. Pair of dropkicks follows, and she tries a suplex, but the back gives out on her. She uses a standing moonsault for two instead, and a springboard roundhouse kick connects. She pulls herself up to the middle rope for a somersault senton splash, but Fox lifts her knees to block, and clobbers her with an axekick at 5:52. This had actual psychology and everything! * ¼

 

WWE Unified Tag Team Title Match: The Hart Dynasty v The Usos: David Hart Smith starts with Jey Uso, and he works the arm. Powerslam gets Smith two, and Tyson Kidd tags in with a headscissors takedown for two. Back to David, but he loses a slugfest, and Jimmy Uso is able to get the tag. The challengers cut the ring in half on Smith, but he manages to fight Jimmy off long enough for the tag, and Tyson comes in hot! The Usos catch Kidd in a combo for two, and Jimmy tries a flying splash to finish, but Kidd gets his knees up to block. Tag is made to Smith, and he goes for a sharpshooter on Jimmy, but Tamina distracts him. That earns her an attack from Natalya, and Roseanne Barr the door! Smith gets Jimmy in the sharpshooter while Kidd hits Jey with a plancha, and the champs retain at 5:52, to a pretty big pop! I’m tempted to give this an extra quarter-star just for the Usos distinguishing gear so I could easily tell them apart, for once. *

 

World Heavyweight Title Match: Rey Mysterio v Jack Swagger: Rey tries sticking and moving in the early going, and nearly lands the 619, but ends up taking an Oklahoma stampede instead. Well, you win some, you end up in Oklahoma some. Rey dodges a corner charge that sends Swagger flying to the outside, and the champ dives after him with a flying seated senton on the floor! Hell of a dive there. Back to the top on the way back in, but Swagger pops up after him with an overhead superplex, and he dumps the champ to the outside for a smash into the announce table. Jack goes to work on the leg to take Rey’s flight away from him, and he delivers a powerslam for two. Pump-splash misses, allowing Rey another flying seated senton, and a headscissors sends the challenger into the middle turnbuckles. Rey goes up with a flying moonsault for two, but a wheelbarrow bulldog is countered with a wheelbarrow suplex for two. Swagger with a gutwrench powerbomb for two, and he takes Rey up to the middle for a helicopter slam off, but Mysterio counters with a tornado DDT for two on the way down. That allows him to land the 619, but Jack counters the flying springboard rana with an anklelock! Rey makes the ropes, so Swagger dives on him with the pump-splash, and adds a second one for good measure. He goes back to pounding the leg, and it’s another anklelock, but Rey shakes him off, and hooks a rana into a cradle at 10:45. This was solid. Afterwards, Kane shows up to kick the crap out of Swagger, and then he decides to cash in his newly won briefcase on Rey. ** ¼

 

World Heavyweight Title Match: Rey Mysterio v Kane: Kane slams the battered champion around at the bell, and a chokeslam leads to a Tombstone for a quick finish at  0:52. Will every match tonight end at the fifty two second mark of their respective minutes? DUD

 

WWE Women's Title Match: Layla v Kelly Kelly: Layla gets cocky at the bell, so Kelly tackles her down with a Thesz-press, and the challenger unloads. Handspring backelbow misses, but Kelly recovers with a victory roll for two, and she dumps the champion to the outside. Kelly tries diving at her from the apron, but Layla trips her up, and the champ goes to work on the leg. To the outside, Kelly takes a ride into the barricade, and Michelle McCool helps Layla out with some interference out there. Kelly fights her off, so Layla charges, but Kelly is ready with a pair of clotheslines. Somersault cradle gets her two, and a rocker dropper is worth two when Layla is in the ropes. That almost fell apart because Kelly somehow forgot to let her keep a leg free. Kelly tries a sunset flip from the middle rope, but Layla reverses the cradle at 3:56. Kelly wasn’t working particularly smoothly out there, but it was short, and energetic. ¼*

 

Money in the Bank Ladder Match: Miz v Randy Orton v Edge v Chris Jericho v Ted DiBiase v John Morrison v Mark Henry v Evan Bourne: Winner gets a contract for a WWE Title match. Everyone goes for the ladder at the bell, which doesn’t work, duh. It ends in a big slugfest, and Edge gets the high ground, and makes a climb. Orton pulls him off, and they brawl on the outside, allowing DiBiase the high ground, but Bourne dropkicks a ladder away from him. Evan wants to climb, but Miz nails him before he can, only to get into a tug-of-war with Jericho before he can climb. They slug it out until Henry comes in and chucks a ladder at both of them, as the announcers reference LEGO in a way that likely wasn’t product placement, but in 2021 would absolutely be. Henry hits Miz with a straddling ropechoke, but he wastes time celebrating, and Jericho brains him with a ladder. Chris heads in with the ladder, but Bourne knocks it away from him, and makes a climb attempt - only for Edge to cut him off. Evan fights him off, but the lost time has allowed Orton to come in, and Bourne gets cut off again. Randy plants him with a DDT, but doesn’t get to make a climb, and it ends up with Miz and DiBiase putting the boots to Morrison. They try whipping him into a corner mounted ladder, but Morrison reverses. He makes a climb, but the idiot has the ladder placed way off-center, because, well, he’s an idiot? I guess? Edge meets him at the top to slug it out, so Jericho sets up a second ladder to try and climb, though he’s off-center too. Were the lights in their eyes, or are they just morons? And then the whole thing ends up being just a set up for Henry to tip them all over. Bourne springboards in to nail Henry, and everyone ends up down, giving Maryse a chance to sneak in and try to climb herself. I like how trepidatiously she climbs, and now we see women have their own Money in the Bank matches with giant bumps every year like it’s no big deal. Morrison pulls her off, but that draws DiBiase in, and they spill to the outside. Edge takes the opportunity to climb, but Morrison recovers, and dives onto the other side of the ladder to knock Edge off. He nearly gets the case, but Edge jams him up in the ladder (literally), then tips him over. Kind of a weird bump, but it looked interesting, at the very least. Edge wants to climb, but Ted knocks him off with another ladder, and builds some kind of weird jungle gym with several ladders. Ted climbs, but Henry pulls him down, and slams him. Mark climbs, but Bourne leapfrogs him, though again, the ladder is way off-center. No matter, he gets slammed off by Edge and Orton, and ends up getting caught by Henry for a slam on the floor. Everyone gangs up on Mark out there like they did on Big Show earlier, and everyone goes in to play on DiBiase’s jungle gym (which has gotten bigger and more contrived in the meantime, somehow). Ted ends up getting shoved out of the ring on a ladder slide (in a dangerous looking bump), and Orton drops Edge with an RKO. Meanwhile, Jericho and Morrison slug it out atop the jungle gym, and Chris ends up in a tree of woe on the ladder, but Randy pulls Morrison off with an RKO. The moment it’s over, Bourne is on Randy with a flying shooting star press, however, and Evan climbs! He quite nearly gets it, but Jericho pulls himself out of the tree, and knocks Bourne off! That allows Chris to try and grab it, but Edge pushes past. Randy takes Jericho out with an RKO, then shoves Edge off the ladder, before finally re-centering it. He climbs, but Miz tips him over (in a weak bump, where Randy looked like he was afraid of the ball), and Miz takes the case at 20:26. This was another one that was fine, but felt like it overstayed its welcome. ** ¼

 

Main Event: WWE Title Cage Match: Sheamus v John Cena: This is pinfall/submission or escape rules. Slow start, with Sheamus getting control, and tossing John into the cage for two. Cena tackles him down for mounted punches, and he turnbuckle smashes him, but a corner charge hits the champion’s elbow. Sheamus goes back to his slow pounding, but Cena gets a second wind, and makes a comeback. The second jumping shoulderblock gets sidestepped, however, and John crashes himself into the cage to give the champion a two count. Inverted DDT across the knee gets two, so Sheamus makes a climb attempt, but Cena vertical superplexes him back down for two. Attitude Adjustment, but Sheamus counters with a DDT for two, and adds an axehandle. Another one finds the mark for two, so Sheamus slaps on a sleeper, and the challenger fades. John fights back to a vertical base, so Sheamus wraps a bodyscissors on while cranking the sleeper, but Cena makes it to the ropes. He manages to climb them while still in the hold, but Sheamus knocks him back down, and bootchokes him. John fights him off and makes a comeback, hitting the Five Knuckle Shuffle to set up the AA, but Sheamus grabs the cage to block. The champ pulls himself up the side, but Cena follows, and they slug it out on the top rope - won by the challenger. He dives with a flying fistdrop instead of finishing his escape, however, and Sheamus dodges his stupid move. Sheamus ties him in the ropes and unloads, and he makes his climb, but Cena brings him off the top rope with a one-handed bulldog for two. AA, but Sheamus counters with a uranage across the knee, as the announcers note that Sheamus wants to win this by pinfall or submission. Then why does he keep trying to climb out? If you’re going to tell that story, tell that story. Make a choice, and a commit. Brogue Kick gets the champion two, but Cena counters the follow-up with an AA, finally landing it for two. Cue the Nexus, but the referee steals their bolt cutters away. They do realize that there’s seven of them, and no roof to the cage though, right? Again, maybe they should watch more 90s stuff for inspiration. Start with SummerSlam ‘94. Meanwhile, Cena gets Sheamus in the STF, but the referee is bumped, and can’t record the submission. Cena lets off and climbs, but the Nexus cut him off. He nearly fights them off, but Sheamus has a clearer path, and manages to escape at 23:00. Such a slow, 70s style main event. If they insist on going back in time, why are they always emulating that boring shit, instead of trying to mimic the mid-90s, which was the best fusion of the old style psychology and modern high spots? *

 

BUExperience: It’s not unwatchable, but it’s not exactly worth watching, either.

 

*