NXT WarGames (December 2021)

Original Airdate: December 5, 2021

 

From Orlando, Florida; Your Hosts are Vic Joseph, Wade Barrett, and Beth Phoenix

 

Opening WarGames Match: Mandy Rose, Jacy Jayne, Gigi Dolin, and Dakota Kai v Io Shirai, Raquel Gonzalez, Cora Jade, and Kay Lee Ray: Who opens a show with a WarGames match? Kai and Ray start, both coming in armed. And then both immediately discarding their weapons and chopping each other. These two would never survive life on the streets. Ray delivers a DDT, but gets reversed into the cage, allowing Kai to grab a kendo stick. She unloads with that exactly once before abandoning it, and this thing is just dying out there, with no action or drama. Kai grabs a baseball bat, but Ray dives at her to knock it away, and she gets some revenge with the kendo stick. She takes Kai into the gap and drops her across a trio of planked kendo sticks, but Kai fights her off with a neckbreaker as Jade enters the match. With a skateboard. Well, that’s certainly a unique choice. She and Ray dominate Kai for a bit, until Gigi enters… also with a weapon. Hers of choice is a trashcan and a duffel bag. She chucks the trashcan at Jade to allow her a dive into the cage, and Ray eats a German suplex. Io is next in, and I kinda wish they’d fake the clock a little bit to get them in faster, because this thing is dragging badly. Jade shows some fire with a rana in the gap area, but gets killed by Gigi before she can continue, and Jacy is next in. Too many of these people have similar names. Jacy brings a table in with her, since apparently no one can enter the cage empty handed. It’s not a dinner party, you’re fine. Jade puts Jacy (see?) through her own table to draw a ‘holy shit’ chant (really?), but dislocates her shoulder, so Io pops it back in for her (worked). The whole psychology of this match is not only weird, but it makes no sense. Gonzalez is last in for her team, and her accessory is a shovel. New Groundskeeper Barbie, from Mattel! She puts Kai in a trashcan and swings her around like something out of an Adam Sandler movie, and then Io dives with a flying moonsault onto the can. Not sure how in the world that’s supposed to be an offensive move. Kai is literally wearing a shield! At worst, what, maybe her ears will ring a little bit from the sound? Or, maybe Io is trying to use tinnitus to trigger vertigo, thus putting Kai off of her game, and making her susceptible to a submission? And here I was saying this match had no psychology! What a fool I am. Mandy is last in, and she doesn’t even bring a weapon with her! And she didn’t even BYOB! What a bitch! She tugs at Jade’s bad arm, but the rest of her team back her up, and use kendo sticks to keep the heels at bay. The heels gang up on Gonzalez, but Jade comes over with a kendo to save her from getting finished, so they all advance on her. The heels back Jade into a corner, but she comes out swinging! She manages to get a few shots in before getting overwhelmed, and Mandy bashes her with a running kneesmash for two. Rose seems shocked that Jade kicked out, though I’m not sure why, since it clearly missed by a mile. And then Jacy gets knocked out, and Jade just pins her at 31:22. As is often the case with NXT’s WarGames revival, this just went on for way too long. And, really, it wasn’t even very good aside from that issue. ¾*

 

NXT Tag Team Title Match: Fabian Aichner and Marcel Barthel v Kyle O'Reilly and Von Wagner: Marcel and Kyle start, and they feel each other out, dominated by the champion. Over to Aichner to continue to control the contest, and he unloads with chops in the corner after Kyle shakes off a wristlock. Kyle manages to out move him to turn it around, and Von tags in with a side suplex for two. Headbutt drop gets two, so he takes Aichner into the home corner for a double team with Kyle, but Aichner fights Kyle off with a suplex before tagging back out. Marcel abuses him in the corner ahead of a suplex of his own, but he wastes time gloating, and Kyle is able to tag. Wagner comes in hot on the champ, but Marcel evades him in the corner, and passes to Aichner. Aichner with a rolling fireman’s carry slam, but a pass back to Marcel ends in Barthel taking a short-clothesline. Kyle tags back in to keep the hurt on Marcel, so Aichner takes a cheap shot from the apron, and the champs go to work. Kyle fights them off long enough for the tag, and Roseanne Barr the door this time! Wagner slams anything that moves for a bit, and an Olympic slam on Marcel is worth two. Wagner gets into trouble in the heel corner, however, and the champs hit him with a stereo baseball slide for two. They try a combo, but Wagner blocks, and fights them both off ahead of a tag. Kyle dives in with a flying kneedrop to Marcel’s knee, and he capitalizes on it with a grapevine, but Aichner dives on him to force a break. They look for another combo, but Wagner steps in, and Kyle gets Aichner in a guillotine choke, but Marcel saves. Everyone trades off with big moves, and a combo on Marcel is worth two. Kyle with a brainbuster on Aichner for two, and he goes for a triangle choke to put it away, but Aichner powers to a vertical base in the hold, and Marcel is able to dive in with a combo to retain at 14:53. This was fine and fun. ** ½

 

Hair v Hair Match: Cameron Grimes v Duke Hudson: Hudson blocks a charge and pounds him into the corner to start, and he tosses Grimes over the top. Hudson follows to send him into the steps, but Grimes reverses, and dives from the apron with a somersault senton. Grimes with a pair of running forearm smashes on the way back in, but a corner clothesline gets caught in a uranage. That allows Duke to pound him with mounted punches, but Grimes fights him off in the corner, and hits a springboard flying moonsault press for two. Grimes unloads in the corner until Duke falls out of the ring, but an attempt to follow gets him suplexed on the floor. Grimes beats the count, so Duke puts the boots to him, and blasts him with a backelbow. Hudson works an abdominal stretch from there, really giving us a look at how out of shape Grimes is more than anything else. Suplex, but Grimes counters with a cradle for two, so Hudson blasts him with a knee. Corner whip further rattles Grimes, and a backbreaker submission looks to finish, but Grimes escapes. Grimes fights back with a leg-feed enzuigiri, and a bodypress is worth two. Front-powerslam, but Duke reverses, so Grimes counters with a tornado DDT for two. Slingshot sunset flip, but Duke blocks with a cradle, only to get busted using the ropes. That allows Grimes to finish the cradle for two, and he unloads with strikes ahead of an inverted rana. Corner big boot and a flying bodypress get two (and a nice one at that), but a charge gets blocked with a scrapbuster for two. Hudson tries a crucifix buckle bomb, but Grimes sends him into the buckles to block, and hooks a schoolboy at 10:24. Totally watchable, though completely unspectacular. * ½

 

NXT Cruiserweight Title Match: Roderick Strong v Joe Gacy: Gacy is a cruiserweight? What’s next, you’ll tell me Rey Mysterio is a heavyweight? Strong wins a slugfest early on, and a pair of backbreakers find the mark. Criss cross goes Gacy’s way with a clothesline, however, and Joe puts the boots to the champion. Joe unloads in the corner, but Strong turns the tables, and they spill to the outside. Gacy gets control out there, and he delivers a backbreaker for two as they go back inside. Vertical suplex gets one, but Strong blocks a German suplex, and lands a knee strike in the corner. Strong takes him upstairs with a vertical superplex for two, and a gutbuster is worth two. Boston crab looks to put it away, but Gacy seems to be almost enjoying it, and he counters to a crippler crossface. Well, that is THE move for psychopaths. Strong makes the ropes, so Joe clotheslines him over the top, and then dives after him. Inside, Gacy hits a powerbomb for two, but a charge ends badly when Strong manages to throw a dropkick. Strong adds a suplex-backbreaker, and that’s enough to retain at 8:26. This was a weird cruiserweight match. And, yeah, that was sort of the point, but it wasn’t interesting enough to work as avant garde. *

 

Main Event: WarGames Match: Tommaso Ciampa, Johnny Gargano, Pete Dunne, and LA Knight v Bron Breakker, Carmelo Hayes, Grayson Waller, and Tony D'Angelo: They should have went really meta with this and had, like, Billy Kidman managing the young guys. Gargano and Hayes start… and trade hammerlocks. Really getting over the violent and chaotic nature of the match type, guys. A criss cross filled with springboards goes Gargano’s way, and he unloads chops in the corner, so Hayes tries another springboard, but lands in a roundhouse kick. Gargano tries a spear through the ropes and into the gap, but Hayes dodges, and they do some more choreography ending in Johnny hitting the spear from the gap into the second ring. Waller is next in, and he challenges Gargano to square off with him in the first ring, and wins the exchange by countering a DDT with a suplex. Tilt-a-whirl backbreaker follows, and Waller clobbers him with a leg lariat, as Hayes joins in for a double team. Gargano fights them both off in another overly choreographed bit, so Trick Williams tries to climb into the cage, but it goes nowhere. This is exactly why the original version had a roof on it. Dunne is next in, and that means trouble for the new blood. Hayes springboards his way into a German suplex, and the millionaires club apply stereo submissions while kicking the other guys in the face, in a neat bit. Waller comes to life with a very overly choreographed pair of stunners on Gargano and Dunne, as Tony makes his way into the match. He brings a bunch of weapons in with him, since of course. Here’s a thought: maybe they shouldn’t keep a bunch of weapons underneath the ring to begin with? That’s like giving a baby a revolver as a rattle, and then wondering why your baby has no face. Knight is next in, but Tony has padlocked the door shut, so he can’t come in. I guess their whole evil plan hinges on the idea that neither Knight nor Bron can climb a fence, and predictably, that falls apart within seconds. Kudos to them for at least having Knight immediately figure it out, instead of standing around like a moron for five minutes first, like he might on the main roster. Bron is next in, and he wastes time cutting the chain off with bolt cutters instead of just climbing in, so I take back everything I just said. Or, maybe, it’s supposed to illustrate the difference between the experienced guys, and the kids. Like a, ‘you’ve still got a lot to learn there, kid’ type of thing. That is what they teach in college, right? Like, how roofs work, and stuff? It’s suplexes galore once he’s inside, of course. Ciampa is last in, and thank God that Bron has already cut the chain off, because I’m pretty sure Ciampa did not matriculate. He does some combos with Gargano for a bit, but the new blood get control, and unload. For a long ass time. Finally, the old guys make a comeback. For a long ass time. And the Bron catches Ciampa with a press-powerslam for the pin at 38:13. *

 

BUExperience: It may be a new day in NXT, but the sun still rises and sets with matches that can’t help but overstay their welcome.

 

DUD