WWF at JJ Crosetti Hall (January 15, 1994)

Original Airdate: January 15, 1994

From Watsonville, California 

Opening Match: Marty Jannetty v Louie Spicolli: Holy God, this building is tiny. It looks like a rec hall (and probably is). I did a Google street view search on it, and it looks like it’s literally in the middle of nowhere. Lots of stalling from Spicolli to start. He gets Marty in a headlock, but Jannetty counters to a chinlock, then a keylock. Spicolli escapes and uses a snapmare into a somersault necksnap, and he adds a headbutt drop to the groin for two. Backbreaker gets two, so Spicolli goes to a chinlock. Marty fights out, but Spicolli cuts off his comeback. He tries a suplex, but Jannetty counters with a cradle for two, and a rollup gets him two, before Spicolli cuts him off again. He works an abdominal stretch, until Marty escapes, and plants a superkick on him. Jumping backelbow finds the mark, and Jannetty uses a series of turnbuckle smashes to leave Louie loopy for the rocker dropper at 15:51. This would have been fine with all the fat trimmed off, but they went way too long with this. Marty would go on to steal Spicolli’s outfit for his 1995/96 run, at least. ¾*

Owen Hart v Bastion Booger: These two had a million matches together in Stampede (and quite a few in the WWF) so this should at least be okay. Booger stalls, so Owen makes him run with a pair of armdrags, and Booger bails. Back in for a test-of-strength, and Hart fights him off with a standing dropkick to set up a pair of straddling ropechokes. Irish whip, but Booger reverses him right over the top, so Owen skins the cat back in, and throws a dropkick. Pair of chops leave Booger tied up in the ropes, and the Rocket unloads on him. Nice touch as Owen, despite being a babyface, is showing heelish colors like beating up on him despite the referee’s protests. Cross corner whip, but Booger reverses, and he follows in with an avalanche. That allows Booger a legdrop for two, and he works a chinlock from there. Hart fights to a vertical base, so Booger used a pop-up flapjack, and drills the Rocket with a headbutt. Bearhug, but Owen slugs free, so Booger clotheslines him to cut off the comeback. Booger was just so disgustingly fat here, and that outfit wasn’t doing him any favors - which was the whole point, of course. Booger with a splash and another bearhug, so Owen tries a dropkick after escaping, but Booger dodges. Avalanche, but Hart side steps this time, and Owen dives with a flying bodypress at 9:22. Nothing special, but competent. *

The Quebecers v The Steiner Brothers: Pierre and Scott Steiner start, and Scott gets the first takedown, prompting Pierre to complain of cheating. Scott powers through the accusation with a hiptoss, so Pierre tries a backdrop, but gets countered with a tigerbomb for two. Tags all around, and Jacques immediately bails to frustrate Rick Steiner. Well, I can’t blame him. If a grown man was walking around barking at me, I’d get the hell out of there, too. Jacques comes back in swinging, but walks into a powerslam for two, and Rick holds him in an armbar. Jacques goes to the eyes to force a break, allowing him a bodyslam, and he passes to Pierre to dive at Rick with a flying axehandle. Pierre tries another dive, but gets backdropped, and he bails. Dust settles on Jacques and Scott, so the heels try a cheap shot, but it backfires. Scott hooks Jacques in a cradle, but Pierre manages to sneak in with a cheap shot anyway, and that’s finally enough to turn the tide. They go to work on Scott, until he fights off a double team, and gets the tag off - Roseanne Barr the door! Scott delivers a Frankensteiner on Jacques (the sheer physics of that move are incredible - it seems like it isn’t going to work literally the entire way through, before suddenly coming together), but Pierre breaks the pin, and the referee disqualifies the Quebecers at 12:26. A cheap finish to an otherwise okay match, though they had much better ones on TV, and probably would have had a pretty great one at WrestleMania X. Though, honestly, the Steiner’s were in such a bad mood around that period that they might have dogged it, and anyway, the Men on a Mission match with the Quebecers ended up being better than it had any right to be. *

Bam Bam Bigelow v Doink the Clown: Weird music for Doink tonight. Bigelow knocks him around in the early going, but Doink gets wise to him, and uses a drop-toehold to take the Beast from the East down. Bigelow gets into the ropes to escape, but Doink stays on him with a fujiwara armbar after the break. Corner charge, but Bigelow dodges, and suplexes the clown for two, so Dink runs interference to piss Bam Bam off some. “Hanna-Barbera ain’t got nothing on the WWF,” quips some smart ass in the crowd. Doink tries a slingshot sunset flip, but Bigelow blocks, and works him over. Doink reverses a vertical suplex to allow him a comeback, and a kneedrop gets him two. Cross corner whip sets up a monkeyflip, but Bam Bam blocks, and hooks a leveraged pin at 14:17. Yes, they really did book a fifteen minute Bigelow/Doink match, this wasn’t just a fever dream. Forget worrying about their status as ‘independent contractors’ versus ‘employees,’ it’s shit like this that we really need government oversight for. DUD

Main Event: Casket Match: Undertaker v Adam Bomb: It really is a main event anywhere in the country! Assuming ‘anywhere’ is literally the ‘middle of nowhere.’ Bomb hammers away to get started, but hits boot on a corner charge, and Undertaker slugs him until he bails. Bomb puts the boots to him on the way back in, but Undertaker fights him off as he goes for the casket, and they spill to the outside. Considering Undertaker had been spending weeks out in the woods supposedly building the casket for Yokozuna, was this supposed to be something from the leftover pile? More weak brawling, until Adam goes low to get control, and he unloads in the corner. Sleeper makes Undertaker groggy, allowing Adam a clothesline, and he covers to prove that he could have had a pin if pinfalls count. He even slaps the mat three times to make sure we all understand how powerful he is. Chinlock leaves Undertaker down and out, and Adam adds a trio of elbowdrops. He goes for the casket, but Undertaker fights him off at the last moment, and makes a comeback. And by ‘comeback’ I mean literally one move, as he delivers a chokeslam, and then just rolls him in for the win at 9:06. This was aggressively bad. -¾*

BUExperience: I assume this show was so short because it was a Saturday, and they needed to clear the venue in time for the Silverman bar mitzvah. This was a pretty terrible B-house show, with minimal star power, and held in a barn. The crowd was surprisingly into it, but then, it’s a barn, so it’s probably a step up from what usually goes on in there.

DUD