WWF at Nassau Coliseum (July 9, 1994)

Original Airdate: July 9, 1994

From Uniondale, New York

Opening Match: 1-2-3 Kid v Kwang: Kid is coming off of perhaps his career best performance against Bret Hart (though it wouldn’t air for another few days), and Kwang is coming off of… karate stuff…? Posturing to start, until Kwang catches him with a shot, and pounds him down. Corner splash misses, allowing Kid to recover with a series of kicks, and a ten-punch count. Spinkick sends Kwang to the outside, so he stalls out there to regroup, and break the momentum. Back in, Kwang throws a knee, and he puts the boots to Kid, before applying a half-crab. Kid slugs free and uses another spinkick to put him on the outside again, but this time Kid dives after him with a somersault plancha. Unfortunately, Kwang clobbers him with a superkick out there, but Kid beats the count, so Kwang covers for two. Nervehold, until Kid fights free, and hooks a sunset flip for two. Kwang cuts him off with a spinkick for two, and it’s back to the nervehold. Kid fights him off in the corner, so Kwang hits him with a corner spinheel kick, and Kid ends up on the outside. Back in with a snapmare for two, with Kid reversing the pin for two. That was unique, I don’t think I’ve ever seen anyone actually reverse a lateral press before. Kid blocks a corner charge with a superkick, and he makes a comeback. Spinkick gets him two, and a backslide is worth two. Whip into the ropes gets reversed, but Kid ducks a spinkick - only to eat a spinheel kick anyway at 10:04. This match would make Eric Bischoff very, very excited. Kid should not have been doing jobs for Kwang at this point, though. * ¼ 

Yokozuna v Typhoon: Lots of posturing to start, with both guys trying to prove that they’re fat. First contact doesn’t come until over five minutes in, as they finally charge each other, and Yokozuna knocks him over. Typhoon wants another go, and gets the better of it after Yoko obliges. We’re almost seven minutes in, and literally all that’s happened is a pair of shoulderblocks. Yoko sells that shoulderblock like he’s been working for twenty minutes, before coming at Typhoon with an eyerake, and a chop. Whip into the ropes sees the top rope snap off, so I guess they can quit trying to prove fatness now, we’re good. Yoko with a headbutt and a legdrop at 8:18. This was so embarrassingly bad that even the ring didn’t want to be associated with it. -**

Randy Savage v Jerry Lawler: Lawler stalls to start, with Savage getting increasingly worked up, until the King finally suckers him into a cheap shot. Jerry follows up with a turnbuckle smash, but Macho reverses a second one, so Lawler pulls a foreign object out of his tights. Savage gets wise to it thanks to the crowd, but the referee finds nothing. Savage insists that the official pat him down, but now Lawler has it stashed in his palm again, and he pops Randy with it. Lawler keeps hammering him, and they spill to the outside, where Macho takes a shot into the post. Savage beats the count back in, but Lawler just does a bunch more stalling and jawing with the crowd instead of actually trying to finish him. Jerry would make a great Bond villain. King tries a 2nd rope fistdrop, but Macho dodges, and dives with a flying axehandle - Lawler able to block. Lawler calls for the piledriver, but Macho backdrops out of it. He tries he own, so the King uses his own backdrop, but Randy is ready with a sunset flip at 10:55. Standard Memphis bullshit. I guess it’s fun if you’ve never seen it before, and it definitely works it you’re in the live crowd, but I’d qualify as neither. This would wind up being the last ever meeting between these two. ½*

WWF Tag Team Title Match: The Headshrinkers v Double Trouble: Double Trouble are subbing for the Heavenly Bodies here, and I think this may be the first time I’ve actually seen them work. I definitely remember the name from magazines back in the 90s, though. They’re… big. So much so that the Headshrinkers are scoring off of them with weight jokes. Double Trouble II tries a pump-splash, but slips off the ropes, in what looked like a legit botch. He tries again, but this time Fatu just walks away from him like he’s not even doing anything. Tag to Samu, and Roseanne Barr the door. Stereo superkicks retain at 8:09. To give you an idea of how uninteresting Double Trouble were, they worked in the WWF on and off for two years, but never once made it to TV. DUD

Main Event: WWF Title Iron Man Match: Bret Hart v Owen Hart: Sixty minutes on the clock for this. Bret has his old school jacket from 1992 here, for whatever reason. Owen annoys his brother by stalling and complaining of everything from hair pulls to unclean breaks through the initial series of lockups. That goes on for about ten minutes before segueing into a feeling out process, with both guys reversing each other through hammerlocks. Bret dominates his younger brother on the mat with an armbar, and when Owen tries criss crossing, Bret is ready with a crucifix for two. They trade wristlocks, until Owen tries a fireman's carry, but ends up getting countered to a mat-based headscissors. Owen keeps escaping and trying a side-headlock, but Bret keeps countering back to the headscissors to annoy him, then drops a leg to subdue his little brother for an overhead wristlock. This is all very basic stuff, but they're doing it well, and keeping the crowd engaged throughout. A hiptoss sees Owen bail back to the outside for more stalling, but he charges Bret after nearly getting counted out - only to get taken down with a drop-toehold into another armbar.

Twenty minutes in, Owen escapes with a knee, then pounds Bret in the corner to setup a pair of cross corner whips. Straddling ropechoke gets two, and a snapmare sets up a camel clutch. Bret escapes, so Owen shifts down to a chinlock instead, but Bret starts escaping THAT too, so Owen hangs onto a side-headlock. Bret wrestles to a vertical base and counters to a standing overhead wristlock, but Bret forces him back down for another chinlock. Again, super basic stuff, but not boring, as they don't just sit there in the holds, but are constantly reversing and shifting to keep it engaging. Owen blocks an escape with another mat-based headlock, but Bret keeps rolling back into pin attempts. Bret slugs free, but runs into a backelbow for two as he does, and Owen takes him right back to the chinlock. Bret escapes, but runs into a belly-to-belly suplex for two, and it's back to the chinlock. Okay, I know I said they're doing a good job of keeping it engaging (and they are), but we're thirty minutes deep now, and this needs to pick up a bit. And I guess they agree, as Bret escapes, and this time counters a knee with a schoolboy for two. Owen quickly pounds him to keep control, and hits a neckbreaker for two, then adds a legdrop for two. Backdrop, but he telegraphs it, and Bret counters to a backslide for two. Owen desperately tries to cut him off with a reverse chinlock, but Bret hits a sunset flip for two, and unloads a few turnbuckle smashes and European uppercuts to take the pep out of his brothers step. Cross corner whip is reversed, however, and Owen goes up with a missile dropkick for two. Another legdrop leads to another belly-to-belly, but Bret tries countering to a rollup, so Owen dives forward to send the champ crashing out of the ring! Owen goes after him with an axehandle off the apron, and he rams Bret's back into the edge of the ring a couple of times out there. He leaves him out there to take the countout, but Bret fights to the apron, so Owen tries to suplex him back in, but Bret escapes. He tries a bodypress, but Owen dodges, and Bret crashes into the ropes hard, in a nice bump. That allows Owen to try a sunset flip, but Bret drops down to counter in a cradle at 36:00. Owen goes back to stalling as they resume, but Bret forces him to engage, and pounds him in the corner.

Forty minutes in, Owen escapes a standing side-headlock with a kneebreaker, and he wraps his brother's leg around the post a couple of times for good measure. He's pushing the referee's limits there, so he brings it back in, and wraps Bret's leg around the middle rope, wrenching. Owen kicks at the knee before taking him down with a corkscrew legwhip for a leglock, but Bret counters into a cradle for two, so Owen lets off, and punishes him by beating on the leg in the corner. Another corkscrew legwhip puts Bret down for a modified figure four, but the Hitman escapes with a desperation headbutt. He can't follow-up, however, and Owen pounces right back to the leg with a figure four! Bret reverses and gets into the ropes, but he again has no follow-up, and Owen reapplies for a submission at 43:58 - tying the score. As the referee checks on Bret between falls, Owen uses the time to loosen up one of the top turnbuckle pads, then goes right back to hammering the knee once Bret is rendered able to continue. With the score now tied, Owen doesn't mind pushing the referee by blatantly wrapping the knee around the post a few times, and another figure four puts him ahead at 46:08. Owen gives him little time to recover after the fall, smelling blood in the water, and immediately applying another figure four - this time using the ropes for leverage as he distracts the referee by pointing out that one of the pads is missing! That was fucking awesome! The referee completely misses it as he replaces the pad, and Owen keeps hammering the leg. Corkscrew legwhip sets up another figure four, but Bret counters with an inside cradle for two! He can't follow-up, so Owen is able to keep control with more abuse to the knee, but he misses a charge in the corner, and Bret pulls it together enough to capitalize with a 2nd rope flying clothesline! An inverted atomic drop sets up a clothesline for two, as Bret tries mounting a comeback. Russian legsweep is worth two, and an inside cradle gets two. Backbreaker sets up a 2nd rope pointed elbowdrop for two, and it's Sharpshooter time, but Owen deftly rakes the eyes to block! He tries capitalizing with a vertical suplex, but Bret counters with a vertical superplex - leaving both men looking up at the lights. Bret gets the better of it, and Owen is subdued enough for the Sharpshooter to even it up again at 53:45. With time winding down, a slugfest breaks out, and Bret manages to control. Sharpshooter, but Owen quickly grabs the ropes before Bret can apply it, so the Hitman instead rattles his brains with a piledriver for two. DDT gets two, but Owen wins another slugfest with a leg-feed enzuigiri for two. Cross corner whip, but Bret reverses, and adds a pointed elbowdrop for two. Bodyslam, but Owen counters to an inside cradle for two. Bret with a rollup for two, as they start pulling out all the stops here! Bodyslam, but the knee gives out, and Owen topples him for two! Dropkick, but Bret counters with a slingshot for two! Backbreaker, but Owen counters with a tombstone to set up a flying headbutt for two! Sharpshooter is applied, but time expires at 60:00 with a tied score! Owen, of course, thinks he's won it, and is none too pleased to hear that time expired without a submission. Okay, so now it continues on into sudden death overtime, and Owen picks up where he left off with a backbreaker into a Mexican surfboard! Bret counters into a lateral press for two, so Owen puts him in an abdominal stretch, but Bret reverses! Owen escapes with a hiptoss, and he dumps Bret to the floor for a ram into the post! He leaves him out there to eat the countout, but Bret beats it in, so Owen punishes him with a cross corner whip. Criss cross ends in a double-knockout spot, and Bret gets a leg across Owen's chest for a desperate two. Slugfest ends in Bret grabbing a sleeper, but Owen manages the ropes, and pops his brother with a mulekick! Hey, those are only the stepchildren. I'm sure he was still a great uncle to the real kids. Sharpshooter looks to finish, but Bret manages to reverse on the bad knee, and that's enough to retain at 65:30, 3-2. This took about a half hour to really pick up, but once it did, it was tremendous. The final few minutes before the sixty minute time limit expired were especially good, with both guys throwing desperate bombs at one another to try and put it away.  It’s also kind of surprising that they booked five clean finishes (with four of them submissions) on two guys that they were keeping strong going into SummerSlam. I’d have expected at least one countout of DQ fall, but nope. Overall, not on par with their pay per view outings that year, but still a very good match – though one that would have perhaps been better served as a thirty minute Iron Man. *** ¾ 

BUExperience: This version cuts out the Rick Martel/Duke Droese and IRS/Tatanka matches, though I don’t think either of those is a particularly big loss. This took place during a really dark time for the promotion, with Vince McMahon on trial, poor houses up and down the line, and longtime official Joey Marella’s accidental death less than a week before. You don’t see much doom and gloom in the actual product, but it’s definitely an interesting context. As for the actual performances, it’s pretty much shit across the board, but the Hart Brothers doing an hour in the main event is really strong, and saves this from being worthless.

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