Thursday, August 28, 2014

WWF Monday Night RAW (December 12, 1994)



Original Airdate: December 12, 1994

From Liberty, New York; Your Hosts are Vince McMahon and Shawn Michaels

Opening Match: Bob Backlund v Doink: Backlund is still on his whole 'clown holocaust' trip this week, claiming that the clowns have been 'manipulating' the people long enough, and that the Chickenwing will 'exterminate' Doink. Can we get this guy back today? This sort of bat-shit insanity is exactly what would spruce up RAW these days. It should be noted that this place is so small, that the standard 'RAW' banners hanging in the background look 10x larger than usual. Pretty sure this was an actual high school gym. Doink uses Dink to orchestrate a sneak attack before the bell, but can't match Backlund on the mat, and ends up grabbing the ropes to escape a waistlock. Bob with a single-leg takedown into another waistlock, but Doink is back on the ropes to force a break. Doink fires back with a takedown of his own, and cradles Backlund for two, but Bob gets him on the mat in a side-headlock. Doink counters with a headscissors, but Bob bridges, so Doink hooks a backslide for two. Doink with a belly-to-belly suplex for two, and he hooks a side-headlock of his own. Backlund makes the ropes to break, but fires off a forearm after teasing a clean break, then starts ripping at Doink's arm. Sadly, it doesn't pop out of the socket tonight. Bob stomps the arm to set up the dreaded Crossface Chickenwing, but Doink grabs the ropes to block, and hits a sunset flip for two. Bob takes him back to the mat with a hammerlock, and shifts into an armbar when Doink gets uppity. Doink with an inside cradle for two, but Bob pounces back on the arm before he can follow-up - this time with a wristlock. Doink tries to force it back up to a vertical base, but Backlund hangs on to the arm, and monkeyflips him back into an armbar - rolling the hold into a couple of pinfall attempts. Doink makes the ropes to break, and counters a cross corner whip with a 2nd rope bodypress for two. Inside cradle for two, and a backslide gets two. Bodyslam sets up an elbowdrop, but Bob rolls out of the way, and Doink lands on the bad arm. Chickenwing, but Doink fires off a backelbow - only for the arm to give out as he tries a slam, and Backlund to apply the hold for a submission at 14:00. As weird as it was to see Doink trade holds with Backlund like it was 1981, these two actually worked well together, and it was a nice change of pace to see a Doink match without comedy spots, and gimmicks. ** ¼

This weekend on Superstars, a tournament begins to crown new WWF Tag Team Champions, with the final scheduled for the Royal Rumble

Shawn Michaels demos the new RAW video game by squashing Diesel's character with his. Vince then hypes a special Coliseum Video release that offers tips on playing the game. Dear God, how did we ever survive without YouTube?

Jeff Jarrett is in Las Vegas to audition them as his new hometown. On Freemont street? Really? Interestingly, they've decided to position him not only on Freemont street, but directly in front of a strip club

Razor Ramon v Mark Starr: Razor is Intercontinental Champion, but this is non-title. He's also got on some pretty fucking awesome matted purple tights. Starr actually gets a fair amount of offense on the knee in before walking the inevitable Razors Edge at 3:00. I wonder if that knee work (and Razor's selling of it) were meant to tie into the Royal Rumble match with Jarrett? I doubt it, but it would be some pretty near booking if it were. ¼*

Todd Pettengill hypes some special Razor Ramon and Doink stuffed animals, with proceeds going to the Make-a-Wish Foundation. Poor kids have had it hard enough, no reason to expose them to Doink

Jerry Lawler hosts The King's Court, with guest IRS (and his Druids) to continue to build his stupid feud with The Undertaker

Hakushi vignette. This week, it's Japanese letters superimposed over some clouds. Oh, it's on now

Aldo Montoya v Nick Barbarry: Montoya may have been going nowhere, but his pyro was always super cool, at least. Shawn just has a ball tearing poor Aldo apart on commentary, as he runs through his stuff, and Harvey Wippleman comes down to observe. Wow, really? Heel managers are fighting over THIS guy? No wonder they were doing TV in the same building that people get wedgies in. Was Shawn the only sane one in the entire place? Montoya finishes with a bulldog at 2:30. Afterwards, Wippleman continue his money feud with Howard Finkel by pushing him over. ¼*

This past weekend on WWF Mania, the show celebrated its 100th episode, and Doink showed up wearing an outfit so terrible that it makes me start to see Backlund's point. Also, Todd gets a new co-host from Santa as part of the celebration (complete with gift box) in the form of Stephanie Wiand. Man, strip clubs, nubile females delivered in packages to dudes with mullets, clown holocausts... this was an interesting month in the WWF

King Kong Bundy v Bob Knight: Speaking of interesting. No, wait, never mind. I've got nothing. Seriously, Bundy should have just gotten himself a deal to do some jobs to Hogan in WCW, because there's no way Vince was paying him enough to waste his time with this. Bundy actually teases going to the top rope at one point, but changes his mind, and finishes with the Avalanche at 4:00. DUD

Santa comes down (complete with Shawn hilariously freaking out, and excitedly repeating 'I've been a good boy' about a dozen times), but his gift for Shawn ends up disappointing when he gets a toy version of the WWF Women's Title. Don't worry, HBK, just get on the horn to Atlanta. They probably have a better one in the trash somewhere

BUExperience: It’s not for everyone, but I really enjoyed the Backlund/Doink match, and Shawn continues to carry the rest of the episode on his back with his antics on commentary

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