HITMAN383 Rant for PCW TV - June 7, 2002

- The HITMAN383 Rant for PCW T.V. June 7, 2002. This is a one-match show (Mike Gallows vs. Jackal in the tournament finals), in one hell of a match. (This was originally written around then)

- Once again, please don’t try this at home.

- Also, I want to note that even though I am very hard on the wrestlers at some points in the rant, I mean it only in a good, constructive way. If I ride you for something, its only to help it be improved the next time, not a personal shot  

- The system for backyard wrestling, obviously, will be more liberal than it would be for professional wrestling. Afterall, there is no ring, so any type of bumps have to be taken extra carefully, and high spots have to be limited. Here is the system I use:
- BTW, I use this system:
***** - Excellent,
**** - Great,
*** - Good,
**- Okay,
* - Decent,
DUD – Nothing Match.
- The Backyard scale means the same, only I’m more liberal with the ratings.

- Live from the PCW Arena.

- Your Hosts are General J.D., and Big Ben. (Remember this show quite well, as I brought my girlfriend at the time with me, and while they were setting up, General JD and I tried to teach her to drive my car around the neighborhood, which was significantly more dangerous than anything that happened in the matches)

- PCW World Title Tournament Finals: Jackal vs. Mike Gallows: Pre-match, Big Ben shows the brand-new world title belt to the contestants, (My WCW ‘Big Gold’ replica) as J.D. tries to sell the home audience on the idea that Wicus is “injured.” Of course, the truth is he was very unceremoniously bounced from the organization in late May after being a pain. The story is, Omega was taking on the returning Genocide and (although I wasn’t there) all accounts place Wicus as overly negative towards both, throwing them off their games during their match. This upset the PCW booking team so much (and especially the influential Jackal) that he was released. (More like, it pissed off Jackal, and since it was his backyard, Wicus was gone. Jackal could have a temper that way, but no one could really disagree with him on that call. That said, everyone made peace a couple of weeks later) Even Gallows understood the move. So, of course, now Gallows is free to have a singles career. And that leads us to this match, one that the two guys meticulously planned out for weeks in advance ala Hogan vs. Warrior at WrestleMania VI. (They did hours worth of preparations for this one in secret, and BOY, did it pay off) They do a bunch of false tie-ups to start, trying to feel eachother out, and trade armbars. Jackal, a master of psychology, focuses on the bad wrist of Gallows, the same one he legitimately broke a year previous in a PCW match. Now THAT’S some bad ass psychology: working a part you injured a year before. Reversal sequence allows Jackal to go into a mat-based (grass-based?) side headlock, and they show style, by making sure to roll through for two counts ala Flair vs. Steamboat. Jackal with the Guerrero cradle for two, so Gallows pops up with a crucifix for two. Jackal with a roll up for two, and Gallows with a sunset flip for two! Jackal with a rolling cradle for two, but Gallows bridges out, and backslides him for two! They fight over a waistlock, into the Japanese bulldog, all ending in Jackal hitting a standing victory roll for two! This is incredible! Gallows goes deep with some Dragon-like armdrags, and hits an enzuiguri. Jackal no sells, however, and gives him he finger, just to be a dick. Gallows goes into a leglock to down the big guy, again showing some wicked psychology, and working the knee Jackal hurt in the first round of the tournament. And one that he legitimately hurt in a Judo competition. Jackal responds with some Vader-like headshots, and goes back to the wrist. Another beautiful thing about this match is that any submission hold that can be moved into a cover, IS! Gallows escapes with a rolling anklelock, which he raises to apply pressure to the knee, and then drives his head into the knee. (That’s another great thing about this match, whenever they could add anything to a hold, they did!) Gallows with a big bulldog, but as he covers, Jackal rolls through for a two count of his own. Slugfest leads us to the creek, where Jackal takes an X-factor onto the log. Gallows with a springboard bodypress for two, but he takes a WEAK stun gun on the log. He responds by giving Jackal an equally weak knee breaker on the log, and we head back to the main area. I hate the creek area, just to be clear, and I think it hurts a match like this. Unless you’re doing a throwaway brawl, don’t go there. If you’re doing an epic, technical masterpiece like this one, stay away from it. Mike tries a Russian leg sweep, but gets reversed for two. Slugfest allows Gallows to slam Jackal, and he goes back to the knee. Suplex, but Jackal reverses, only to have Gallows land on his feet, and neckbreaker him! That gets two, and Gallows goes back to the knee, using some innovative stuff, like rolling knee snaps. Think the Hennig-neck snap, but to the knee. He viciously clips Jackal to really floor him, then tries the figure four, but gets cradled for two. Leg sweep misses, and they to a vicious chopfest. Gallows wins with a double knife edge, getting two, but Jackal goes back to the wrist/arm area. He tries a cross arm breaker, but Gallows actually fights it by holding his hands together, and refusing to allow Jackal to apply the hold! You never see shit like that in the BIG LEAGUES, let alone here. Jackal over powers him, however, and applies the hold. Overhead wristlock is countered with a bridge, which Jackal counters by adding some weight to it. This is just some crazy shit. Bow-and-arrow style wrist-breaker (and he makes sure to rake the eyes, of course), but irony rears its ugly head, and Gallows uses the eyes to break. Gallows does the Owen Hart escape from a wristlock, but ends up taking a DDT for two. Slugfest goes Jackal’s way, and he tries a slam, but Gallows bridges out, only to take a reverse DDT for two. Pedigree gets two, but he hurts his knee, too. Gallows bridges up again, but takes a Diamond cutter for two. Jackal taunts him some, earning him a punch in the face. Mike tries a piledriver, so Jackal reverses into a backdrop, but Gallows reverses THAT into a bridge, only to get reverse DDT’d to the knee for two! Jackal with a figure four of his own (and adding the icing with a “whoooo this, motherfucker!” at Gallows), and things look bleak for our hero. He reverses, however, but Jackal is just too big, and turn it back over. It looks like a dead end for Gallows, submit of get pinned, but he manages to reverse again! Jackal powers out, so Gallows applies his own figure four, just to be a punk. Jackal tries everything to counter, and eventually does by manually unlocking the legs. Lariat, but Jackal ducks, and the referee gets clocked! Jackal then innovates the whole “low blow” spot entirely, but throwing Gallows in the air, then pivoting around, and allowing Mike to fall straddled on his leg. That spot has to be SEEN to be appreciated. While Moo is still down (Mick Moo, the referee), Jackal snags a chair, and tries a slam on it, with Gallows turns into a pedigree, which Jackal turns into a tombstone, and he hits it. Cover, but no referee! Moo slowly crawls over, and we get the dramatic two count! See, now THAT’S a trait of a match like this one, not that creek crap. Jackal is shocked, and argues with Mick, only to be lariated. They then do a breathtaking reversal sequence, where Jackal goes for a suplex, is reversed into a reverse DDT, reversed into his own, reversed again, reversed into an overhead suplex, and finished with Gallows reversing into a spinebuster! If the spinebuster was worth anything, this sequence would be even MORE impressive. It still gets two. Axe kick misses (rightly so, too, since it’s so inconceivable), but he still manages to hit two rolling piledrivers for two. Speaking of piledrivers, I’d like to see someone pull off a cradle version some day. Piledriver again, but Jackal backdrops him, only to have Mike LAND ON HIS FEET (!!), and hit a URINE-AGE for two! Jackal with a belly to belly, but Gallows reverses into his pedigree/rocker dropper combo for two! He fights to do it again (his bad wrist hampering him), but Jackal reverses into the Martyrs Cross! That gets two arm drops, so he hits a vicious spinning neckbreaker for two. Powerbomb, but Gallows reverses into the Sharpshooter. Jackal won’t roll with him, however, so Gallows impresses the hell out of me, by applying pressure on the shoulders, therefore forcing Jackal to either get pinned, or kick out, which would in turn push his momentum into the hold! That is just INSANE! (Beyond brilliant) The wrist gives out on him, however, so he tries again, and again the strategy works. The wrist holds up this time, but Jackal still does everything to power out. He passes out, however, and Gallows win his first world title at 27:22. Afterwards, Gallows is presented with the title, and celebrates in his glory. The match was incredible, doing all sorts of little things that most professional wrestlers overlook in their matches, and doing them in style. Things like psychology that leads to a finish, things like working things that were hurt a year before hand, things like learning from your mistakes, things like making sure to cheat at every opportunity, things like using a resthold to its full potential with various pin attempts, things like understanding your opponents mindset, and figuring ways to get HIM to put HIMSELF in a hold (i.e. the Sharpshooter spot). These things are usually reserved to guys like Ric Flair and Bret Hart, and these two just went out there and stole the show. No wonder there were no other matches here, how could they keep up? *****, to officially make it the best match in PCW history. (I realize that rating will sound ridiculous to some of the people reading this, but this was legitimately one of the best matches I’ve ever seen – pro, or otherwise. The backyard rating system is more liberal, but even scoring this like a professional match, it’s **** ½, easy)

- Bottom Line: Hey, what more do you need? 30-minutes of Jackal and Gallows innovating their offenses on eachother for the world title, all done in glorious psychological fashion, and style is pretty much enough for ANY show.

- Highest Recommendation. (Unfortunately, they’d never equal it, as the promotion folded over the summer. But what a way to go out, with Gallows finally getting the title in the best match of both their careers)