WWF Monday Night RAW (December 9, 1996)

Original Airdate: December 9, 1996 (taped November 18)

From New Haven, Connecticut; Your Hosts are Vince McMahon, Jim Ross, and Jerry Lawler

Sycho Sid v Hunter Hearst Helmsley: Neither Sid's WWF Title or Hunter's Intercontinental title is on the line here. Ross notes that there have been a lot of comparisons between HHH and Bret Hart, which I'm sure the Hitman just loved hearing. Sid jumps him in the aisle during the entrances, and he takes him inside to continue the beating in the corner as the match officially begins. Sid with a press-slam, but HHH dodges a big boot, so Sid just shoves him over the top instead. Sid follows to the outside to drop Helmsley across the guardrail, as we get a little onscreen graphic to hype the In Your House main event, and they actually forget to blur 'WWF' for once! I mean, they're usually so good with it that they blur signs in the crowd, so that's a surprising gaffe. Inside, Sid hits a chokeslam and the Powerbomb, but Hunter rolls to the outside before Sid can cover, and gets himself counted out at 2:57. What the hell was that all about? I get wanting to put Sid over as a big monster right before the PPV, but why use your Intercontinental champion to do it? Was Bob Holly busy, or something? ½*

And then to make matters worse, we get highlights of Bart Gunn getting a visual pinfall over HHH on Superstars over the weekend, before getting saved by interference from Billy Gunn. Are we sure the curtain call punishment was over by this point?

Goldust v Bart Gunn: Goldust blinds Bart with a handful of gold dust right away, and he drops him across the top rope. To the outside, Goldust drops him across the rail, and Marlena messes with him via cigar smoke. Bart tastes the steps before Goldust takes him back inside via suplex, but Gunn manages to counter a knee with a schoolboy for two. Goldust cuts him off with a clothesline for two, and he works a chinlock as Billy cuts a promo on his brother while observing the action on a backstage monitor. Kneedrop misses, allowing Bart a little offense, but he quickly misses a corner charge, and Goldust works a headvice. Vince puts over Gunn's transition into singles competition, prompting Ross to note that Bart's "left hand has been very effective." Yeah, just you wait. Bart manages a bodypress for two, and he wins a slugfest, but a bulldog only gets two. Backdrop hits, but a flying twisting bodypress misses (that didn't look very good), and Goldust clips the knee for three at 6:49. This felt too long for what it was. Afterwards, Billy comes out to verbally kick his brother while he's down, but Bart chases him off. ¾*

Todd Pettengill recaps the Karate Fights Holiday Tournament ahead of next week's highly anticipated Sable/Jerry Lawler final

Handicap Match: Jesse James v Justin Hawk Bradshaw and Uncle Zebekiah: Jesse attacks before the bell (I'm sensing a theme this week), and knocks both guys around, as the crowd snoozes. Zebekiah bails, leaving Bradshaw to eat a pair of legdrops for two, but a cheap shot from Zebekiah puts Jesse on the outside. Zebekiah attacks again out there, and the heels double team in their corner on the way back in. People are literally leaving their seats in droves in the background here. The match isn't that bad, but the characters all suck, and no one cares. It's such a major difference between this and the super hot WCW crowds over on Nitro. Bradshaw with a side suplex and a 2^nd rope elbowdrop for two, followed by a sidewalk slam for two. Superplex, but Jesse shoves him off the top to block, and he dives with a flying clothesline. Jesse makes a comeback, but Justin blocks the pumphandle-slam. That draws Zebekiah in with the branding iron, but he accidentally hits Bradshaw, and James covers at 5:51. Almost, to the second, the same length as last weeks match. And just as boring. Afterwards, Bradshaw takes Zebekiah to task for the screw up, and then kicks the crap out of him. ¼*

Jim Ross brings Bret Hart out for an in-ring interview to hype up In Your House. Hart notes that he's done nothing over the last eight months but thinking about being WWF Champion again. Well, that I can believe. Not much here, and not really worth an in-ring interview. But Bret, at least, came across so much more cool and confident than Shawn Michaels has over the last few weeks

The Acclaim Slam of the Week if Flash Funk hitting the tumbleweed on Goon last week. Also, who designed their logo? Those are not fucking c's

Mankind hung out in the desert while in Dubai on tour, just screaming "I want to go home" over and over again

Royal Rumble ad

No Holds Barred Match: Undertaker v Mankind: No Holds Barred seems like kind of a step down after one guy literally buried the other alive a couple of months ago. Mankind tries a sneak attack, but clearly Undertaker has been watching the rest of this show, because he sees it coming. Undertaker with a jumping clothesline and the ropewalk forearm right away, and the chokeslam sets up an early Tombstone attempt, but here comes Executioner. That distracts Undertaker enough to chase, allowing Mankind to attack, and send 'Taker into the steps. He tries for the rail next, but Undertaker reverses, and Mankind eats steps. Undertaker starts going after the claw hand, but a big boot misses, and Mankind clips the leg. Cactus clothesline sends them tumbling over the top, and they brawl all around ringside out there, with Mankind targeting the leg. Undertaker actually selling the leg is such a departure from the usual zombie stuff he'd been doing for years, and it's pretty cool. Undertaker fights back with a bodyslam onto an announce table, but Mankind clips the leg again on the way back inside. He goes up for a dive, but Undertaker grabs him by the throat to block, so Mankind uses a drop-toehold to fight him off. He grabs a chair, but Undertaker punches it back into his face before he can use it. Tombstone, but Mankind counters with the Mandible Claw, and Undertaker is fading. The camera angle they use also makes it look like he's giving Mankind a very graphic blowjob. Undertaker manages to power out of the hold, and he scoops Mankind for a dangerous looking Tombstone at 11:18. Not on the level of Buried Alive or the Survivor Series matches, but watchable. Afterwards, Executioner returns to put Undertaker down with the Asiatic Spike to push their In Your House match. *

BUExperience: Despite a good helping of star power, this still managed to be a pretty dull hour, with a very relaxed go-home build for In Your House. I mean, Sid and Hart have had zero interaction on any RAW since Survivor Series, and the rest of the matches have had very low-key builds as well. This one definitely didn’t get me in the mood to rewatch the pay per view, so whatever they were going for was not very effective.

Monday Night Wars Rating Chart

	12/9/96
Show	RAW	Nitro
Rating	2.3	3.3
Total Wins	17	41
Win Streak		24
Better Show (as of 12/2)	18	37