WWF Superstars (December 12, 1992)

Original Airdate: December 12, 1992 (taped November 24)

 

From Dayton, Ohio; Your Hosts are Vince McMahon, Bobby Heenan, and Jerry Lawler - the King's WWF debut

 

The Nasty Boys v Brooklyn Brawler and John Rechner: It's kind of fitting that Lawler would debut on a show taped at the Nutter Center, home of the first King of the Ring pay per view. But not as fitting as the future Ballz Mahoney appearing here. The crowd doesn't really care about the Nasties, and it's probably for the best that they ended up switching things up for the tag title match at WrestleMania. Rechner has got a really weird haircut, legitimately looking like he lost a fight with a lawnmower. What is that even supposed to be? Jerry Sags with the flying elbowdrop at 2:39. Sags could sometimes execute that one properly, but it looked terrible here. DUD

 

Gene Okerlund is in the control center with an update on next month's Royal Rumble, announcing the WWF Title match with Bret Hart defending against Razor Ramon. Considering the event isn't until late January, they're wasting no time in getting the ball rolling on that one. Gene also mentions that this year, the winner of the Rumble match will earn a WWF Title shot at WrestleMania, beginning a stipulation that continues on to this day

 

Bam Bam Bigelow v John Paul: Bam Bam's already switched over to the gear with blue/red/yellow flames, so I guess that didn't take him long at all. Meanwhile, Doink the Clown shows up at ringside, looking like he's doing some day drinking. Well, it is Saturday. Bigelow with the flying headbutt drop at 1:15. Well, that was brisk. Afterwards, Doink messes with him by throwing confetti at him, which is a weird direction to go, considering they're both supposed to be heels. But I guess you could also retcon it as the basis for their feud a year later. ¼*

 

Big Boss Man notes that his lifelong dream has always been to be a law enforcement officer. Well, why did you give that up to become a pro-wrestler, then?

 

WWF Tag Team Champions Money Inc think the Nasty Boys smell bad. It's long been said that all the best heels do is tell a version of the truth. So Money Inc must be the greatest heels of all time

 

Reverend Slick testifies. How did this make TV? Was Vince hoping airing these bits would help him in the eyes of a jury, or something?

 

Marty Jannetty v Duane Gill: Luckily, Jannetty has toned down his piñata gear this week, going with something out of the classic Rockers closet instead. Though, really, he shouldn't have been dressing like one-half of the Rockers at all by this point. Doink is still hanging around at ringside, being annoying, and WWF Intercontinental Champion Shawn Michaels split screens in to act like a dick towards Sensational Sherri. Shawn knew just how to play this character, and he's so much more interesting now than he ever was as a Rocker. Jannetty with a flying fistdrop at 3:05. Nice sell from Gill on the finish there. Afterwards, Doink throws a bucket of water at Marty, so I guess he's an equal opportunity asshole. ¼*

 

Nailz v Mike Collins: I get that he was supposed to stick around, but Nailz pretty much disappearing after the Boss Man feud is a very fitting end to the character. The gimmick really had no shelf life beyond that feud. Nailz actually varies up his offense quite a bit this week, adding jabs and stomps, before finishing with the choke sleeper at 1:47. Vince wonder who will 'humble' Nailz, so I guess Iron Sheik was gearing up for a comeback that got derailed when Nailz split. DUD

 

Gene brings WWF Champion Bret Hart out to talk about defending against Razor Ramon, and it must have been weird for the live crowd to have them promoting the Rumble considering Survivor Series hadn't even aired yet at this point. Bret is interrupted by Bobby Heenan (complete with a funny bit where Heenan 'leaves the broadcast position' to try and make this seem live), cutting a promo on behalf of Ric Flair to hype up the rematches they were having at the house shows. Flair himself soon joins them to properly cut a promo on the Hitman, and it's pretty great. Flair was a weird fit in the WWF, as he was something of a cartoon character, yes, but his style was so much better suited to Southern style wrestling. But, then, so was Jerry Lawler's, and it worked out pretty well for him. And next we get an appearance from Razor Ramon as well, and I'm not getting how two heels like he and Flair seem to have no issues that both want Bret's gold. It's also telling that Hart only seems to sweat when faced with Razor, kind of treating Flair like a ranting old homeless man than a threat. So Ramon tosses his toothpick at the champ, earning him a punch from the Hitman, and the heels gang up, but Mr. Perfect runs out to make the save. This was a great segment, and it was nice to see them build some stuff with actual altercations, as opposed to just having guys cut studio promos against each other. Razor is already an interesting challenger right out the gate

 

Lance Cassidy v Gus Kantarakis: Speaking of guys better suited for WCW. I'm having trouble concentrating on this one, my mind is on how awesome it would have been to see a Hart/Perfect v Flair/Ramon tag match now. They had so many dream match combinations around this time that we never got to see in any fashion, and I'm still sick about it. Cassidy with a flying clothesline to finish my big fat Greek jobber at 1:28. DUD

 

Recently at Planet Hollywood, the WWF was on hand to raise money for the Make-a-Wish Foundation. Believe me, the Nasty Boys do not make anybody's wish come true

 

Undertaker v Barry Horowitz: It's a good thing this was still the era before everyone in the crowd had a sign, or else half the stuff would be promoting the wrong angles. They're still pushing Undertaker/Nailz on commentary at this point, which apparently is building to a Royal Rumble match. I can't imagine that ending well for Nailz, so he'd probably be out of the promotion not long after regardless. I do kind of wish we got to see it though... just imagine all the chokeholds. 1:17. DUD

 

Papa Shango is still cursing shit. Dude, you couldn't even win the WWF Title from Bret Hart, fuck off

 

Max Moon is apparently threatening to shoot people now?!?!?!

 

The Beverly Brothers are done making polite challenges to the likes of High Energy. This was so lazy Genius didn't even join them. Actually, I think he was gone by this point, with Survivor Series marking his last appearance

 

We close with Joe Bevins standing with WWF Champion Bret Hart so Hart can respond to the 'attack' from Flair and Ramon earlier. Um, excuse me? You threw the first punch, Bret. I'm more shocked that Bevins is still around at this point than anything else

BUExperience: This was a solid episode, with a direction for the Rumble established early, as well as a great Hart/Flair/Ramon/Perfect segment