WCW Halloween Havoc 1991

Filling in a bit of a gap, with one of the missing Halloween Havoc rants, though we’re well past Halloween at this point. Hey, it’s hard to find shows from twenty years ago, especially when company that produced them went out of business – give a guy a break! Or a blowjob. But… not at the same time.

This was during a very down period for WCW, shortly after Ric Flair left the company (with their title belt in tow, for fun), and showed up in the WWF.

From Chattanooga, Tennessee your hosts are Jim Ross and Tony Schiavone, with Eric Bischoff on various interview duties. Hey, you gotta start somewhere.


Opening Chamber of Horrors Match: Vader, The Diamond Studd, Abdullah the Butcher and Cactus Jack v Sting, El Gigante, and The Steiner Brothers: Studd is Scott Hall in one of his early gimmicks. The idea here is that they battle in a Hell in a Cell style cage (without tags, tornado rules), and victory is attained when one man is placed in a gimmicked electric chair, and the lever thrown. That sounded kind of scary when I was, like, ten... but in hindsight is monumentally ridiculous, particularly to waste stars like Sting in - and in the opening match, no less. They don't even wait to get into the cage to start brawling, which  sort of (well, not sort of, see: exactly) defeats the entire purpose of the chamber. Inside, Sting unloads on everyone with a not-quite Singapore cane, as Scott Steiner slams Gigante on a casket. The Steiners catch Cactus Jack with a top rope bulldog, and then the action just literally stops so everyone can look at the  sky like a Superman cartoon, as the electric chair is lowered into the center of the ring. Vader tries to  fry Rick Steiner, but no go. They continue randomly brawling, with no team taking a discernable advantage, as the giant chair in the middle of the ring pretty much killed any possibility of spots taking place. The heels finally manage to get Rick Steiner into the chair, but he reverses the... sit... and Cactus Jack accidentally pulls the lever at 12:33 to fry The Butcher. They sold it well, but the match is a DUD, and it likes it.

The Creatures v Big Josh and PN News: PN News was WCW's answer to that crazy rap fad that that was busting up all the jukeboxes in the late 80s - though he's about 400 pounds, and white. He does say, 'yo!' and ‘baby,’ a lot, though, and even fist pumps, so you know he's the real fresh prince deal. He actually works a dropkick early, but gets caught in the heel corner. He uses the power of obesity to come back (kind of, like, the opposite of a Hollywood comeback), and a flying splash finishes at 5:16. A couple nice spots from Big Josh, and News moved well for a guy his size, but nothing more than a squash. ¼*.

Terrance Taylor v Bobby Eaton: This is more WCW Gimmick Goofiness, as they wanted to capitalize on that 'computer fad,' so they had Terry Taylor play a business man who had a laptop that calculated (no, 'computed!') facts about his opponents, giving him every modern advantage. Taylor loses a lock-up early, and bails to consult his laptop. That laptop in 1991 probably cost more than half the roster was getting paid. Back in, Eaton works a wristlock, but they spill to the outside, and Eaton slams him on the ramp way. He follows with a flying splash onto the ramp way, but Taylor posts him, and dumps him into the rail off of the apron. He stops to consult the laptop again (it says, 'don't get cocky'), and gutwrench powerbombs Eaton onto the ramp way. Inside, Taylor with a slam, and a flying splash gets two. He works a long chinlock sequence, but Eaton catches him with a chincrusher to escape. Taylor with a Vaderbomb, but he hits the knees, and Bobby backdrops him. Ten-punch count, and a snap suplex get two. Swinging neckbreaker, and he goes up top, but Taylor crotches him, and tries for a superplex. Eaton blocks, and the Alabama Jam (flying legdrop) finishes at 16:00. Too long for what they were going for, but Eaton worked in some nice spots, and bumps. *.

Johnny B. Badd v Jimmy Garvin: This was very early in Badd's run, and he makes the cast of Glee look like they could headline UFC by comparison. The Freebirds seem to admire his dance moves in the opening bit, though, which is a nice touch. Long stall session to start, with both men playing to the crowd, who actually stay with this pretty well considering both the amount of stalling, and what they've sat through so far. Garvin gets the best of a criss cross, and in an awkward spot, starts another criss cross... with himself. That was super odd, as Garvin just started running the ropes while Badd was down, and eventually hit a shoulderblock when he did get to his feet. Someone missed their mark there. Badd works a chinlock, and hits a backdrop. He botches a flying sunset flip for two, and a flying elbowdrop gets two. He tries a flying axehandle, but gets caught coming down, and Garvin dumps him. Inside, they do a double knockout spot, and Badd tries his Golden Gloves routine, but gets caught in a DDT. His manager, Teddy Long, distracts the referee, however, and Badd gets the pin off of a big right hand at 8:16. I have been watching a lot of Marc Mero’s 1996 WWF run, and it's incredible to see the fantastic wrestler he would become, and... this guy. This was very early into his career, and it showed. He was green, blowing spots, and his timing was horrible. ¼*.

WCW Television Title Match: Steve Austin v Dustin Rhodes: Austin with a ponytail, and in Zubaz print-style, multicolored short tights is a sight to see. He looks less 'Stone Cold,' and more 'beach bum.' Feeling out process, and Rhodes catches him with a dropkick for two. They trade mat-based headscissors and front facelocks, until Rhodes dumps him with a clothesline. Steve catches him with a side suplex coming back in, though, and dodges the bulldog. Dustin works a mat-based side headlock, but they keep it interesting with a few pinfall attempts off of it. Criss cross, and Austin dodges a bodypress, putting Rhodes on the floor. He follows outside, and just unloads on him with fists of fury, drawing color from his challenger. Austin with a flying axehandle to the floor (which Dustin nearly blows by wandering out of position, and forcing them to recalibrate), and inside Austin with a gutwrench powerbomb for two. Rope assisted chinlock, giving WCW a chance to take a pretty blatant camera shot of Austin's valet's cleavage. Sloppy cradle reversal sequence, and Rhodes with a lariat for two. Dropkick misses, but an atomic drop doesn't, and Dustin, with two minutes left on the time limit, decides the smartest thing to do would be to dump him out onto the floor. Powerslam back inside gets Rhodes two, and he does a ten-punch count, busting Austin open as well. Another ten-punch count - only this time, using elbows, which, since his last name is Rhodes might as well be attempted homicide - and a flying clothesline looks to finish, but the time limit expires at 15:00. This was alright, but could have been a lot more fun had they not been stalling towards the time limit - particularly the long resthold portion in the middle. Still better than their snooze fest two years later, flaws and all. Maybe it was the Zubaz. ¾*.

Oz v Bill Kazmaier: Oz was Kevin Nash doing a... Wizard of Oz gimmick (he was billed from 'Emerald City') which actually lasted more than one show. That was a case of when owning everything works against you - as Ted Turner owned the rights to the Wizard of Oz, so WCW figured, 'hey, how can we works this into our wrestling promotion, and make millions?!' Points for effort, I guess. Power showdown to start, as they no sell offense to demonstrate that they're both great and powerful. Test of strength won by Kazmaier, but he misses a blind charge, and gets side suplexed. By Oz. Oz tries to dump him, but Kazmaier skins the cat - an impressive bit for a guy of his size - and finishes with a torture rack at 3:59. DUD.

Van Hammer v Doug Somers: Van Hammer was a dude doing an 80s metal gimmick, before that was ironic. Think Randy the Ram in The Wrestler - but living it up, back in his day. Somers blows a criss cross to start, but gets powerslammed off of a second go, and backdropped. Elbowdrop, and Hammer with a slingshot suplex to finish at 1:13. Just a squash, as Somers was replacing the injured Michael Hayes - though this had no place on pay per view. DUD.

WCW Light Heavyweight Title Match: Brian Pillman v Richard Morton: This was the finals of a tournament to crown the first Light Heavyweight champion. 'Richard' is Ricky Morton, also working the business man gimmick as part of the York Foundation angle, and also with a laptop.  Richard bails early to consult the computer, and I guess it told him to stop sucking, because he comes back in and takes it to Pillman. He loses a reversal sequence, however, and eats a spinkick, putting him back out with his laptop. Inside, Pillman fakes him out on a criss cross, and catches him with a 2^nd rope axehandle for two. Pillman with a long mat-based side headlock until Morton finally catches him with an inverted atomic drop. Not to be outdone, he goes into his own resthold, however, he chooses an armbar. He also refuses to let Pillman have the record for length – and keeps the hold on just under forever, though Brian wins that one by a hair at ‘forever.’ I timed it. Morton with a side suplex for two, but he gets caught with an enzuigiri. Slugfest, and both men spill to the floor, where Morton posts him. That spot goes nowhere, however, as Pillman immediately finishes him with a flying bodypress at 12:45 to win the title. And the laptop is 0 for 2. This was basically a twelve minute resthold, and certainly nothing like what the Cruiserweight division would evolve into, in the late 90s. Very dull, disappointing match - particularly from Pillman, whom you’d expect a bit more from, considering they were pushing him to a title, and all. ¼*.

Z-Man v The WCW Halloween Phantom: The Phantom is just some random dude in a black cape, and mask, dressed something like the Phantom of the Opera. It sounds stupid, but WCW actually had a good payoff set up for once - though at this point in the show, it looked like a bad cross between the Black Scorpion and the Gobbledy Gooker. Though, I’m not sure there is such a thing as a good cross between the Black Scorpion and the Gobbledy Gooker. Phantom jumps him before the bell, and gets a stomachbreaker, as the crowd snoozes. Z-Man (Tom Zenk) tries to mount a comeback, but gets caught in a standing neckbreaker, and pinned at 1:27. Just a squash. DUD. Later in the show, we would learn that the Phantom is Rick Rude, as Paul E. Dangerously (Paul Heyman) had recently been fired from WCW (kayfabe), and swore revenge. Still, nice guys that they are, they allowed him interview time on their pay per view, so he joins us to declare war on the promotion. He then brings out the WCW Halloween Phantom, who unmasks as Rick Rude, and they promise to tear apart the entire roster. This would become the epic Dangerous Alliance angle, and one of the few times WCW paid something off well, as the Phantom could have easily been a huge miss.

WCW World Tag Team Title Match: The Enforcers v The Patriots: The Enforcers are Arn Anderson and Larry Zbyszko, and the Patriots are Todd Champion and Firebreaker Chip (two goofs whose biggest contribution to the sport is that they hailed from 'WCW SPECIAL FORCES!!'), and actually are the United States Tag Champions at this point, though those aren't on the line, so you can guess how this ends. Zbyszko starts with Chip, and they trade abdominal stretches, which is a stretch, but it works. Larry gets tries of that shit, and tags in Arn Anderson, who looks gloriously cocky. Chip gets the best of him, getting a takedown, and Champion tags in. Anderson loses patience with him, and goes to work, trying a piledriver on the floor. Todd counters with a backdrop, and back inside he takes out both Enforcers with a clothesline. Larry tags in (Larry is such a horrible name for a wrestler, by the way. What is he, an electrician?), and lures him into a chase, which, shockingly, does not go well for the babyface. The Enforcers cut the ring in half, and a Zbyszko swinging neckbreaker gets two, but Champion reverses a suplex, and both guys tag. Dropkicks all around, and I thought the sound went out, but, no - the crowd just does not give a shit. Anderson finishes Chip with the spinebuster moments later at 9:51. Match was standard formula - which is fine - but was so slow and dull that nine minutes felt like twenty nine, and the dead crowd (maybe they were playing along with the Halloween theme?) didn't help matters any. ¼*.

Main Event: WCW World Title 2/3 Falls Match: Lex Luger v Ron Simmons: Big staredown to start, as Jim Ross starts reeling off football stats before they can even tie-up. Long feeling out process to start, as they trade all sorts of 'locks,' with Luger appearing disinterested with the match. Simmons misses a dropkick, but Luger literally just walks around the ring as opposed to capitalizing, until finally following up with some forearm shots. Simmons comes back with a faceslam, a powerslam, and a spinebuster gets him the first fall out of nowhere at 4:54. Well, okay. It does work, psychologically, though if you're going off of Luger's disinterest in the match costs him a fall, and what would have been the title in a regular bout. Though, considering Luger's actual disinterest in the entire promotion (he would be gone within six months), I'm not sure if that was good psychology, or just life, but we'll go with it. Simmons with a bulldog for two after the rest period, and a sunset flip gets two, but he gets dumped. Inside, Luger with a powerslam for two, and a lariat gets two. Suplex for two, and he grabs a chinlock, getting frustrated. Plus, you know, to call some spots. Simmons gets a backslide for two, and starts unloading with the shoulderblocks, but Harley Race (Luger's manager) gets involved, and Simmons ends up dumping Luger over-the-top, which is a disqualification at 15:00. As a rule, I hate that rule, but it works within the confines of it - as now Luger is weak from taking the bump, and the fans can buy that Simmons will beat him. Simmons corners him after the rest period (another stupid booking idea), but Luger throws him a cheap shot. Simmons BLAXPLOITS UP!!, however, and hits a backdrop. Inverted atomic drop, and he follows with a superplex for two. Powerslam, and a 2nd rope shoulderblock looks to finish, but it knocks Lex to the outside. Brawl out there, but Simmons posts himself off of a blind charge. Back in, Luger with a piledriver to retain the title at 18:59. It had some decent psychology, but this match felt like a nineteen minute powerslam. Simmons was well motivated here, though Luger looked like he’d had more motivated dumps. Watching this match, it’s hard to believe it’s the same guy you saw only a few years before – like a good friend whom you’ve had a falling out with. ¾*.

BUExperience: Are you fucking kidding me? It’s like a three hour trip through every bad idea WCW could come up with that year, with a horrible main event to boot. Nothing of historical value, outside of Rick Rude’s debut, though the Chamber of Horrors has gained something of a cult following over the years – but even that’s not worth sitting through the rest of this. DUD.

Looking over all the horrible gimmicks on this show made me think of the difference between WCW-style gimmicks and WWF ones. In WCW they always tried to be too ‘hip’ for their own good. The rapper to appeal to the kidz, the gimmick to take advantage of the ‘computer fad,’ a Wizard of Oz gimmick for those film buffs, a Little Richard gimmick. In the WWF you had the wrestling plumber, or wrestling tax man, or wrestling dentist, or wrestling pirate, or wrestling Native American Indian, and, yeah, a lot of those sucked – but it didn’t feel like they were trying too hard with them. In a good way.