WWF Rock Bottom (December 1998)

From Vancouver, British Columbia, Canada; Your Hosts are Michael Cole and Jerry Lawler.

Opening Match: Supply & Demand v D-Lo Brown and Mark Henry: Val Venis starts with Brown, and D-Lo pounds him into the corner, but gets cocky, and takes a lariat. Criss cross goes Val's way with a spinebuster, and he tags The Godfather in. Godfather controls with clotheslines, and a savate kick looser than his hos. Tag to Henry, and Godfather doesn't even let him get through the ropes before attacking. Well, I can appreciate the enthusiasm. Unfortunately, all he does it kick and punch, so it goes nowhere. Ho Train hits, but Henry shrugs it off and powerslams him. Bodyslam sets up an elbowdrop, but Godfather rolls out of the way and tags, as Cole talks about 'telling stories.' Did I time travel? Okay, it was out of context, but still. Venis comes in hot off the tag, but quickly gets overpowered by Henry, and avalanched in the heel corner. Tag to D-Lo with the Sky High for two, but the flying frog splash misses, and both men get tags. Four-way brawl, and Venis takes a splash from Henry at 5:57. Total TV match in every way. DUD

The Headbangers v The Oddities: Hmm, didn't realize the Oddities were still a thing by the end of 1998. The Headbangers either, for that matter. Mosh starts with Kurgan, and gets tossed around, but Kurgan misses a charge in the corner, and Mosh snaps his neck across the top. Bodypress, but Kurgan catches him like a child, and slams him. Tag to Thrasher, but he walks right into a sidewalk slam before Kurgan tags. Golga avalanches both 'Bangers in the corner, and drops an elbow onto Thrasher, then a legdrop for two. Back to Kurgan for another bodyslam, but a 2^nd rope splash misses, and the 'Bangers capitalize using their speed advantage for some tandem stuff. That goes on until Mosh takes a backdrop, and Kurgan clotheslines him to allow the tag to Golga. He's an asylum of fire, but walks into a flying bodypress from Mosh, and gets pinned at 6:54. Total shit, as Kurgan made Giant Gonzalez look like Bret Hart. DUD

Owen Hart v Steve Blackman: Owen attacks before the bell, and snap suplexes him to set up a legdrop. Chops in the corner, but a cross corner whip gets reversed, and Blackman backdrops him. Clothesline knocks Owen out of the ring, and Steve chases him up the aisle for a running clothesline, then back in for a snap suplex of his own. Backbreaker sets up a surfboard, but Owen pops off an enzuigiri to the Canadian crowds delight. Hart with yet another snap suplex to set up a kneedrop, and a gutwrench suplex gets two. European uppercuts hit, but a 2^nd rope elbowdrop hits Blackman's boot, and Steve dropkicks him into the corner for some chops. Vertical suplex sets up an elbowdrop for two, but Owen stops short to avoid a big kick, and bails to break the momentum. Steve is on him with a hard baseball slide, but Hart stomps him as they head back in, and an inverted atomic drop sets up a spinheel kick for two. Nice sequence there. Dropkick and another snap suplex set up a flying elbowdrop for two. Chinlock slows things down for a bit, and Steve powers up, but takes a kneelift. Hart with a 2^nd rope bodypress, but Blackman rolls through for two - only to walk into the enzuigiri for two. He exposes the turnbuckle to finish this guy, but Blackman reverses a whip into it, then snaps Hart's neck across the top rope. Bodyslam sets up a series of pointed elbowdrops, and he slaps on a sleeper. Hart reverses, then shifts into a dragon sleeper to finish, but Steve kicks him in the face to break. Owen recovers with a DDT before Blackman can sway the momentum, but a missile dropkick is countered into the Sharpshooter by Blackman. Owen makes the ropes, but he's had enough, and decides to walk out - Blackman winning via countout at 10:29. Hated the ending, but a hell of a match up until it, with both guys throwing everything at each other, and tons of heat from the crowd. *** ¼

Six-Man Tag Team Match: The Brood v The J.O.B. Squad: Edge attacks Bob Holly, but quickly walks into a powerslam, and takes a brainbuster. Edge fires back with an electric facebuster, and he tags Christian - Holly countering a backdrop with a double-underhook powerbomb. Tag to Scorpio for a pair of cross corner clotheslines, and a bodyslam sets up 2^nd rope somersault legdrop for two. Tag to Al Snow with trapping headbutts, and a rebound clothesline sets up a head-and-arm suplex. Backdrop fails, however, and Christian dropkicks him before tagging Gangrel for a cross corner whip. They trade go-behinds, and Snow hits a Northern lights suplex out of the exchange for two. Gangrel counters a cross corner whip with a lariat, but ends up taking an ocean cyclone suplex out of the deal for two. Gangrel with a DDT, and the Brood briefly cut the ring in half on Snow, but he manages an inverted enzuigiri on Edge, followed by a sitout powerbomb. Tag to Scorpio to trigger a six-way brawl, and Christian hits the Impaler on Scorpio for the pin at 9:09. Technically fine, but heatless, and disjointed. *

Striptease Match: Goldust v Jeff Jarrett: If Goldust wins, Debra strips nude. If Jarrett wins, Goldust strips nude. We're not in San Francisco, so guess who the crowd favorite is? Goldust controls with a shoulderblock and a headlock early, and a spinebuster sets up a butt bump for two. They spill to the outside, and Jeff snaps his neck across the ropes, then hits a flying bodypress on the way back in - Goldust rolling through for two. God, the roster loved that spot in 1998. That, Russian legsweeps, and sleeper reversals. Hiptoss, but Jarrett counters into a nice single-arm DDT, and he stomps the shoulder. Swinging neckbreaker gets two, and a 2^nd rope fistdrop follows, but Goldust reverses a vertical suplex. He's too dazed to properly capitalize, however, and Jeff dropkicks him for two. Sleeper (see), so Goldust escapes with a side suplex for two, and the Curtain Call hits, but Debra distracts the referee to prevent a count. Jarrett tries a sunset cradle to capitalize, but Goldust cradles the legs for two, and bulldogs him for two. Shattered Dreams hits, so Debra whacks him with the guitar, and Jarrett adds a forward-falling Russian legsweep for the pin at 8:03. Oh, but here's Commissioner Shawn Michaels, and he decides that, sorry, the guitar shot is a disqualification, and Goldust wins - so get strippin' Debra. She gets down to her bra and panties, but Blue Blazer shows up to ruin everyone’s fun, and cover her up. Way to appreciate that face pop earlier, Owen. Good match too, with both guys working the crowd into a frenzy, and keeping a good pace. *

WWF Tag Team Title Match: The New Age Outlaws v The Corporation: Jesse James starts with Ken Shamrock, and Ken quickly controls with punch-kick stuff. Tag to Big Bossman, for a slam, but he misses a splash, and Billy Gunn tags in. Sloppy sequence follows, as Bossman sweeps Gunn into a crotch on the post spot, with Billy pulling back to knock Bossman's head into the post - all done at half-speed, and looking phony. Tag back to Jesse, but Bossman headbutts him, and passes to Shamrock for a cross corner clothesline. Jesse manages to run through his dancing offense, so Ken slaps on the Anklelock in response, but he's near his home corner, and tags to Gunn while in the hold. Billy hits the Fameasser in short order, but doesn't even bother covering, and tags. That strategy backfires when Road Dogg charges into a belly-to-belly suplex, and Bossman tags to help cut the ring in half. That goes on for a long while, as I entertain myself by noting how much Commissioner Michaels looks like 2014 Paul Heyman - only less fat. So, basically, Dangerous Alliance era. Finally, James manages to backdrop Bossman over the top to block a piledriver... then stupidly jumps to the floor to brawl instead of tagging, thus needlessly extending this dreary heat segment when he gets beat up out there. Back in, Jesse manages to block a cross corner charge from Shamrock with a boot, and that's enough to finally allow the tag. Gunn is a suppository of fire, but Michaels pulls the referee out to cut off the comeback. Bossman clocks him with the nightstick in the confusion, but Billy kicks out after a dramatic two count. Shawn gets involved again, but his cheating backfires, and Billy pins Ken at 17:02. Cole: 'It's over! Yes! It's OVER!' Holy shit, I'm agreeing with Michael fucking Cole. This match has fucked with my head. Way, WAY too long for what they were going for here. This would have been fine at around ten minutes (fine - not good, mind you), but it was far too slow and heatless to warrant seventeen minutes. Bad booking. ¼*

WWF Title Match: The Rock v Mankind: Rock attacks from behind as Mankind trades barbs with Vince McMahon, but Mankind quickly turns the tide, and kicks ass in the corner. Out to the floor, Mankind whips him into the steps, then adds a rather vicious shot with them onto the champ. Vince grabs the microphone, and encourages the referee to disqualify him over it, and the distraction allows Rock a lariat on the way back in. He pounds his challenger into the corner, then out again, Rock suplexes him on the floor. Mankind blocks a charge with a big boot, and hits a baseball slide, then tries a 2^nd rope flying elbowdrop on the outside, but Shane McMahon interferes, and Rock brutally slams him down onto the floor. Rock stops to do commentary as Mankind sells it, as Michael Cole stands there sulking at having his headset stolen. I usually hate that spot, but that made it worthwhile right there. Rock with a DDT onto a chair, then rolls him in and covers for two. Bodyslam sets up the Peoples Elbow for two, but a backdrop is countered by Mankind with a swinging neckbreaker to leave both men looking up at the lights. Both men stagger up, and Mankind shoulderblocks him for two. Legdrop gets two, and another downstairs is worth two. McMahon calls for the DQ, but Mankind isn't taking any chances, and piledrives the referee. Good one...? He takes out the timekeeper too, just in case, but Rock attacks before he can take out McMahon as well, and hits a Rock Bottom. Cover, but no referee. Shane comes in with the title belt, but Mankind ducks it, and Rock gets clobbered - Vince's facial expressions just brilliant here. That gets a dramatic two from a replacement referee, but Rock Hurricane DDTs him before he can follow up. It gets two, but he walks into a double-arm DDT for two, and Mankind slaps on the Mandible Claw to win the title at 13:33. Hmm, I always thought his first title was the RAW 'butts in seats' deal, but whatev... oh... wait... here's Vince to overrule the referee, as Rock never technically submitted, and therefore the title does not change hands. Um, what? Hey, if you're gonna do a bullshit finish, fine, but why not just rule it a DQ for Mankind, I dunno, PILEDRIVING THE REFEREE?! I know that the whole point is that McMahon is screwing him, but we've already established the Claw as a legitimate finisher FOR YEARS, you know? *

Main Event: Royal Rumble Qualifying Buried Alive Match: Steve Austin v The Undertaker: Winner gets a spot in the 1999 Royal Rumble. Loser gets buried alive. Doesn’t really sound like a fair trade off there. Brawl in the aisle to start, as Austin chokes him with his vest, and tries to go for the (ahem) kill right away. They brawl around the entrance set for a while, then finally into the ring, where Austin hits the Thesz press and a pointed elbowdrop. Snap across the top rope, and he sweeps Undertaker for a ball shot into the post. He wraps his leg around it next, then hits an axehandle off of the rail. Piledriver, but Undertaker backdrops him to counter, then rams him into the steps. 'Taker wraps his arm around the post as a receipt from earlier, and they brawl towards the gravesite. Onto the mound of dirt, they trade rights, and Austin ends up throwing a piece of guard railing at him. Undertaker gets tossed into the grave, but he hits Austin with a wreath before he can bury him, and they both end up in it. Slugfest, and both guys climb out, and brawl back into the ring. Austin refuses to let him in, however, and keeps him on the outside with clotheslines, but a bodyblock off of the apron is caught, and Undertaker rams him into the post. In, Undertaker chokeslams him, then right back out again, as he drags him back to the gravesite. He knocks Steve into the grave, and starts shoveling dirt in slow motion, and somehow Austin escapes. Wow, after that vicious chokeslam only three minutes ago? Guy's superhuman! Austin whacks him with a random gas can to knock Undertaker into the grave, then wisely grabs a wheelbarrow (conveniently full of dirt), and dumps it onto 'Taker. He then randomly decides to stop and go chase Paul Bearer (aligned with The Undertaker at this point, for those Bearer-tracking), and 'Taker uses the interlude to crawl out. An explosion shoots out of the grave as he does, and suddenly Kane climbs out to brawl with him. Okay. Kane Tombstones him into the grave (both guys trying not to break their necks in the process, and barely succeeding), and Austin rejoins us with a backhoe, and he instructs the driver to scoop up dirt to bury 'Taker. Unfortunately, the driver doesn't seem very well trained, and it takes him forever, but it gets done eventually, and the referee sorta limply raises Austin's hand at 21:28. If I missed anything in there, it's probably because I fell asleep - sorry. DUD

BUExperience: With 1998 coming to a close, the wheels were clearly coming off of Vince Russo’s creative machine. Sure, the receipts were still as good as ever (though this particular show was something of a bomb), but his booking was getting increasingly illogical and desperate. Maybe it was partially how overworked he felt at the time, or maybe he had just run out of good ideas (as his WCW run showed, he only had a limited number of ideas, and most of them were endless rehashes of his better ideas from 1998), but everything that felt fresh and exciting only months ago was quickly becoming cliché and repetitive.

DUD