- Lucky You! A special HITMAN383 Rant for WCW Halloween
Havoc 1998. Why is it special? Because it’s FREEZING outside, and I ain’t going
out, so you guys get a rant! What a deal! (Upstate New York winters! Everybody wins! This was
originally written in early 2000)
- This is the Turner Home Video version, BTW, so some stuff
is cut out.
- BTW, I use this system: ***** - Excellent, **** - Great,
*** - Good, **- Okay, * - Decent, DUD - Awful.
- Live from Las
Vegas, Nevada.
- Your Hosts are Tony Shavonie, Bobby Heenan, and Mike
Tenay.
- Opening video package of Hogan/Warrior, and Goldberg/Page.
Guess which one I liked better?
- The Nitro Girls dance. One of the major problems with this
show was that it had too many crappy segments that don’t belong on PPV, and the
show ended up running some 3 ½ hours long. Hey, it’s WCW. What did you expect? (Funny,
how WWE does literally EXACTLY THAT now, with tons of segments and commercials
on their PPV shows that have no place on PPV shows, and drag the flow of their
shows down)
- More time wasting, as Mean Gene brings out Rick Steiner
for an interview. He say’s that he’s gonna take his brother, Scott, out. Buff
Bagwell joins them, and asks to be in Rick’s corner tonight. Rick, the dumbass,
excepts and allows Bagwell to be in his corner. Man, Rick is dumb. (I
like how I’m calling a guy dump, in the same sentence as noting that he
‘excepts’ the invitation. Gotta love that. Kinda like how WWE calls WCW stupid
at every opportunity, then makes literally the same mistakes)
- Opening WCW Television Title Match: Chris Jericho vs.
Raven: Yes, the opening match, some ten minutes into this show. Before this
even starts, Raven complains about his losing streak, (Another modern WWE booking
trope!) and say’s WCW didn’t tell him about this match until three
hours before the show, so Raven walks. Jericho
makes fun of him, then taunts him in, and we’re under way! Jericho beats him with his own jacket to
start, and catches him with a clothesline for two. The crowd is WAY into Jericho, too, but WCW
can’t take a hint, of course. (Wait, kinda like that Cesaro guy?)
Raven with the Cactus Clothesline, and he drops Chris with a front suplex onto
the steps! He springboard dropkicks him down, but Jericho catches him with a stun gun back
inside. Chris hits his own springboard dropkick, but misses a dive, and crashes
into the railing. Good bump by Chris there. Raven takes a bump to the rail too,
as I bitch about WCW’s crappy camera work. It jumps around so much it can make
you go crazy. (Wait, kinda like that Kevin Dunn guy?) Back in, Raven hooks a sleeper, but Chris side
suplexes out, and hits a senton. He exposes the turnbuckle, but Raven
powerbombs him, and then sends HIM into the post. He hits a flying clothesline
for two, as the crowd goes nuts! They do a cool kick sequence, and Raven hits a
belly to belly for two. Jericho with a victory
roll, and he tries the Walls of Jericho
(then called the “Lion Tamer”) and hooks it on, but Raven makes the ropes.
Raven catches him with a fluke DDT for a dramatic two, and Chris rolls him up
for two. Jericho
with a low blow, and a German suplex for two. They do an Irish whip sequence,
and Jericho
runs into Kanyon (who ran out to help Raven, I guess), and Raven tries the DDT
again, but Chris pulls out and hooks the Walls for the win at 7:53. The crowd
was GREAT for this, and the match was worthy of their cheers. *** ¼.
- More filler, as Hogan and Bischoff come out to talk about
the Warrior. I always thought there were some gay undertones with these two, as
Hogan always tells Eric how much he loves him, and kisses him. Maybe Brutus was
busy some nights, so Hulky just found Bischoff. Who the hell knows?
- Winner gets a Cruiserweight Title match later in the
night: Disco Inferno vs. Juventud Guerrera: Disco kicks some ass to start,
and catches Juvy with a sidewalk slam for two. Juvy chops him down to size, and
catches Disco with a head scissors. They mess up a sequence, but Guerrera hits
a rocker dropper on the second try, but eats elbow off a charge. Disco charges
now, but gets monkey flipped out, and then Juvy hits a head scissors. Back
inside, Disco hits an atomic drop, and a 360 clothesline. He hits the Steve
Austin elbow for two, and goes to the chinlock. The crowd was pretty hot up
until the chinlock, but once he hooked it, it kinda died out. Juvy with a roll
up for two, and a spin kick takes Disco down. Guerrera out smarts him to hit a
stunner, and Disco bails, only to have Juvy dive out after him! Juvy hits a
rana, and calls for the Juvy Driver, but Disco slips out, and hits a crappy stun
gun. He hits a swinging neckbreaker to break Guerrera’s pace, and gets a two
count off of it. Juvy tries a sunset flip for two, and then Disco swings him
around by his legs to retaliate. He gets dizzy, too, however, and falls onto
Juvy’s crotch for two. Suplex by Disco, and he heads to the top, but Guerrera
crotches him in retaliation for the previous spot, and rana’s him off. He hits
a top rope spin kick (called a “flying body attack” by Tony) for two, (I’d
really like to have Tony come back and try to call some of these matches today,
with the wacky spots the workers pull out. Imagining him and, like, Gorilla
Monsoon trying to navigate a 2015 match makes my day) and then a bulldog for two. He tries another
flying head scissors, but Disco slips away, and piledrives him for the pin at
9:38. Terrific match. ****.
- The Nitro Girls dance. Again.
- Scott Steiner comes out to talk, and as he does, we get a
look at the entrance set. One of the tombstones reads “Russo” and the other “Wash.” I know what the
first one means, but what about the second? Anyway, after making some sex
references, he makes fun of Rick and Bagwell, and makes a challenge. He
challenges them to tag up, and face Scott and the Giant for the tag titles
tonight. J.J. Dillon comes out, and says the match is official, but if
Rick/Buff win, Scott has to fight Rick right after.
- More Nitro Girls dancing.
- WCW Cruiserweight Title Match: Billy Kidman vs. Disco
Inferno: Not much rest for the challenger, eh? (Well, there was actually a few
matches in between, but this Home Video version clips them out) Kidman wins an exchange with a dropkick, and
Disco stays on the mat to slow Kidman down. Disco slams him, but Billy takes
him down with a drop toehold, and hooks an arm bar. Disco reverses, but Kidman
catches him with a flying head scissors. Disco hits a quick swinging
neckbreaker for two, and tosses Kidman to the corner with authority. Kidman
charges him, but Disco moves, and Kidman takes a great bump ½ way into the
isle. Ouch. Billy bulldogs him out there, and rolls him in for a suicide
splash, but it misses. Disco gets two off of it, and goes to the chinlock.
Billy breaks away, and clotheslines him down, but Disco pancakes him off a rana
attempt. Side suplex gets two, and Disco snaps his neck on the top rope. Or in
WCW’s case, the top cable. He goes for the Steve Austin elbow again, but
misses, and Kidman hits a sit down powerbomb for two. Powerslam for two, but he
misses a dropkick. Disco tries the piledriver, but Kidman flips out of it, so
he tries again, and this time connects! Disco is dead, too, however, but still
gets a dramatic two count off of it. He tries a suplex, but Kidman escapes, and
tries a springboard bulldog, but Disco turns it into a side suplex! What a
match! Gourdbuster by Disco for two, and he tries the piledriver again, but
Kidman turns it into a faceslam! He goes upstairs, and hits the Shooting Star
Press to retain at 10:45 to a HUGE pop. Another very good match out of Disco
tonight. *** ½.
- WCW Tag Team Title Match: Scott Steiner and The Giant
vs. Rick Steiner and Buff Bagwell: The Giant and Scott Hall were actually
the tag champs at this point, but it’s WCW, so Steiner can defend it too. Giant
kills Rick to start, as Tony says that “Chucky” is cheering Scott on. If you
don’t get that one, you’re lucky. (To say the least...) Scott comes in to pound too, and chokes his
brother on the middle rope. Rick comes back with an inverted atomic drop, and
then ten-punch count. He drops an elbow for one, and tags Bagwell. Bagwell then
waists NO TIME to turn on Rick, doing in a record four seconds. Buff high-fives
the nWo guys, and then runs away. Scott continues to beat on brother Rick, as
the fans chant for Goldberg. Giant (today known as the Big Show), (And
today, STILL known as the Big Show) tags in to pound, and this is REALLY starting
to drag. I mean, EVERYONE in there sucks. Russian leg sweep for a few one
counts, as Giant keeps pulling him up. Scott gets back in, and resorts to a low
blow to keep his brother down, and then the Giant GOES TO THE TOP, and tries a
missile dropkick, but misses and hits Scott. Rick then bulldogs the Giant down,
and covers for the win at 8:23, winning the tag titles. Alone. This would lead
to the whole Judy Bagwell as one half of the tag champions angle. Again, if you
don’t know, you’re lucky. I have to type that a lot during things involving
Rick Steiner, don’t I? Anyway, the match was a total farce, and I’ll raise it
up to a DUD because of the missile dropkick spot.
- Scott then has to face Rick, but he refuses and tries to
run, but Rick catches him for an assault.
- Rick Steiner vs. Scott Steiner: Rick kills him with
clotheslines, and throws him into the corner, front first, from powerbomb
position. Another low blow by Scott, and he hits a belly to belly. Scott
chokes, and even hits the Nash rope choke spot, just to piss me off. Actually,
I don’t hate that spot, I just hate these two. Rick nearly kills Scott with a
poor powerslam, and then belly to bellies him for two. A guy with a Bill
Clinton mask then runs out of the crowd and whacks both Rick and the ref. with
a slapjack, then unmasks as Buff Bagwell. Oh great. Scott covers, and Bagwell
moves the ref.’s arms, but it only gets two?! I thought that was the finish
right there. Scott puts Rick on the top, and hits his top rope rana, and Buff
moves the ref.’s arms again, but AGAIN only two! Rick takes both men out, and
hits his top rope bulldog on Scott for the pin (with another ref. running out)
at 4:11. Total crap, but the rana was cool. DUD.
- Review of the Hall/Nash feud. See Scott was a drunk (in
life AND in the angle), and Nash wants to stop him from further hurting
himself. Scott refuses the help, and pisses off Nash. They also hate each other
now, if anyone cares.
- Scott Hall vs. Kevin Nash: The battle of the
Outsiders. Unfortunately, it’s not 1994 anymore, and they probably won’t get
anywhere near their SummerSlam match. Hall throws a drink in his face to start,
and then kicks him out of the ring. Scott follows, and posts Nash, then whacks
him the mic. Drunky gets a TV cable to choke with, and gets Nash unconscious on
the floor, with the crowd DEAD due to the non-hot start. Hall leaves him out
there to rot, and then cuts a promo, mid-match, while paramedics work on Kevin.
Nash comes back in, and Hall continues to hammer. He slams him, and goes for
the Edge, but Nash pulls away. Hall tries the ten-punch count a couple times,
but Nash keeps pushing him off. Scott slaps him around on the mat, but Nash
comes back with a sidewalk slam. They have a “we’re both really, really tired”
slugfest, on their knees, which is a cool spot twenty minutes into a hard
fought match (to establish how tired both guys are), but not five minutes into
a crappy one. Nash wins it, anyway. He goes for the powerbomb, but this time
Hall bails out. What the hell happened to Scott Hall’s hair between 1995 and
1998? It became so … stringy. (Drugs don’t do a body good, Timmy) Hall goes to work with an arm bar, but Nash
clotheslines him, and kicks away. Kev hits a faceslam, and Nash hits the Nash
rope-choke spot. He then pisses me off by doing it again. He hits the picture
frame elbow, and uses about 100 knees in the corner. Nash hits the big boot,
and then the powerbomb (great one, too) to a huge pop. He calls for one more,
and hits that too. It’s all over but the three count, but Nash doesn’t cover,
rather walking out and losing by count-out at 14:18. Total crapfest, and WAY
too long. DUD.
- More Nitro Girls.
- WCW United
States Title Match: Bret Hart vs. Sting:
Bret was the heel here, and Sting was nWo Wolfpack Sting. Lobster Sting, in
other words. Around 1992 this would have been a guaranteed **** ½ match, but in
1998? Well … we’ll see. Bret refuses to start with Sting, running away and not
getting in the ring. I never liked heel Bret. He finally gets in, and once the
bell sounds, he bails out again to argue with some fans. Did he call Jerry
Lawler up before the event, or something? Sting finally gets sick of this, and
attacks him in the isle, and then drags him back in. He doesn’t do much,
however, but hits an atomic drop for two. Bret comes back with punches, and
rakes Sting on the top rope. Again, I really dislike heel Hart. DDT for two,
and Bret catches him with an inverted atomic drop. D-lo leg drop for two, and
he hooks a chinlock. Sting breaks, but takes a knee, and Bret chokes him on the
middle rope. He hits a misjudged bulldog, but doesn’t cover, instead he chokes
some more. He goes for a suplex, but Sting rolls him up for two. He’s too tired
to capitalize, however, so Bret hits a Russian leg sweep, but misses a 2nd rope
dropkick, and Sting hooks the Death Lock! Bret quickly makes the ropes, so
Sting lets off, and keeps pounding. A criss cross leads to Bret hurting his
knee, and instead of the usual playing possum routine, Sting kicks at it. Bret
pulls out a foreign object, but drops it, and Sting tries to use it, but the
ref. stops it, so Bret hits a low blow. Bret hits a backbreaker, and the 2nd rope
elbow, all done VERY slowly, for two. Bret was obviously pretty unmotivated at
this point, but can you blame him? The “action” spills to the floor, and Bret
tosses Sting to the railing, and kicks at his ribs. The ref. goes to check on
Sting, but Sting accidentally elbows him (thinking it was Bret coming from
behind), and Bret acts like a dick and drops a leg on the ref. Sting starts a
comeback (with the ref. conveniently out), but eats foot off the Stinger
Splash. Bret goes to the top, but Sting stops him and superplexes him off, but
they land ON the ref. Ouch, ouch, ouch. Sting goes for the Splash again, but
hits the post, and gets draped over the top rope. Hart grabs the ball bat, and
whacks Sting a number of times with it, leaving him dead. Bret wakes the poor
ref. up, and then hooks the Sharpshooter for the win at 15:04, since Sting
can’t respond. I have only one thing to say: I wish this was 1992. ¼*. Probably
the worst Bret Hart match I have ever seen, and one of Sting’s worst.
- Hollywood Hulk
Hogan vs. The Warrior: Not “Ultimate,” just “Warrior.” This was being sold
as the biggest match in wrestling history, but even the biggest marks knew that
isn’t true. This also came about when Warrior did all sorts of magic tricks to
scare Hogan, like appearing in a mirror, and coming out of trap doors in the
ring. It was really stupid, BTW, and didn’t do ¼ of the business it did in
1990. That’s when people CARED about this match. And it didn’t need any crappy
magic tricks to get over. Warrior gets no pop, BTW. Hogan doesn’t get much
heat, either. Hulk does the same routine as Bret in the last match, and refuses
to get in with Warrior. “Warrior Sucks” and “Hogan Sucks” chants go up through
the arena, to show how much the fans are anticipating this one. They lock up,
and Hogan goes to the arm bar on Warrior, but Jim reverses. Warrior takes him
down with a shoulderblock, and Hulk bails. Yawn. Hulk FINALLY gets back in, and
he hammers the Warrior into the corner, then chokes away. He hooks Jim in a
test of strength, but unlike 1990, kicks Warrior while he’s down. Also unlike
1990, the crowd doesn’t give a shit. I mean, when they did this little routine
eight years before, the Skydome nearly exploded. They do it here, and the only
thing exploding are their arms from all the steroids they are on. A big Royal
Rumble 1990 criss cross leads to a Hogan slam, but it’s no sold, and Warrior
slams him. Jim (STOP CALLING HIM ‘JIM,’ YOU SNARKY ASSHOLE!) then clotheslines
him to the floor, as another “Hogan sucks” chant starts. Hogan weakly hits the
railing, and then the post in a bunch of fake looking spots. The ref. goes down
off another criss cross, and Hulky calls the nWo down. Giant comes in first,
but accidentally nails Hogan, and Warrior takes him out! He takes Stevie Ray,
and freakin’ VIRGIL out next, and covers, but there’s no ref. Where have I seen
this before? Oh yeah, WrestleMania VI. Side suplex by Hulk, and he takes off
his weight belt for some abuse. He misses a series of elbows, however, and
Warrior tries his big splash, but that ends up missing too. Slugfest won by
Warrior, and he whips Hogan with his own belt. Hulk gets some fire paper out,
and tries to toss a fireball in Warrior’s face, but it misses terribly. I mean,
he lit it, and it kinda just went up, no where near Jim. What a farce this
match is. Warrior hits a top rope double ax, and then another, as Hogan blades.
Hulk with a low blow, and a clothesline, then he hits the big leg drop! He
misses a second, however, as Hogan’s estranged nephew Horace comes out with a
chair. Warrior starts his rope shaking comeback, and clotheslines Hogan a
couple hundred time, but Bischoff takes the ref. out, and Horace bashes Warrior
with a chair to give Hogan the win at 14:16. Afterwards, Hogan tries to light
Warrior on fire, but that plan gets stopped quickly. Crappy, crappy match. ½*,
and that’s being generous. (That’s being extremely generous, to say the
very least) This was also, thankfully, the last appearance of the
Warrior.
- Main Event, WCW World Title Match: Goldberg vs. Diamond
Dallas Page:
WCW actually pulled a ratings ploy with this one, building it up excellently,
and instead of showing it here the show had “technical difficulties” and they
had to air it on Nitro the next night for free. Good idea to boost Nitro’s
rating against the growing WWF, bad idea to your loyal PPV buyers. Big
“Goldberg” chant to start, as this was during his really big period before WCW
screwed it all up at Starrcade ’98. They tie up a number of times to start, and
Goldberg tosses him to the corner every time. He takes Goldberg down with a
quick arm drag, and it spills outside. They slug it out on the floor, and roll
back in for a quick wrestling sequence. Goldberg with a fireman’s carry, and he
goes to the cross arm breaker, but Page gets to the ropes. Page with a stunner,
and he tries the Diamond Cutter, but Bill shoves him to the floor. They fight
over an arm bar, with very creative Owen Hart-like reversal sequences, and
Goldberg shoulderblocks Page out. DDP hits a neck snap, and a neck breaker to
take control. Russian leg sweep gets him two, and he goes into a front face
lock. They trade knee shots, and Goldberg hits a belly to belly. Slugfest won
by Bill, and he suplexes him to the mat. Goldberg with a sidewalk slam for two,
and he goes back to the cross arm breaker. Goldberg tries a slam, but Page does
a head scissors. Goldberg is stunned, so he superkicks him in retaliation.
Goldberg eats post off a spear attempt, and takes a nice bump to the floor.
Page capitalizes with a top rope clothesline for two, and he catches him with a
good jumping DDT. He calls for the Diamond Cutter, but Goldberg spears him to
stop the effort, re-hurting his shoulder in the process. He goes for the
Jackhammer, but his shoulder is too sore, and Page escapes right into the
Diamond Cutter! Big pop for that one. DDP is too hurt to cover, however, but
still gets on top for a dramatic two count. Goldberg fights his way to his
feet, and hits the Jackhammer on Page for the pin at 10:27. A little on the
short side, but still a very good match. *** ½. Page laid this one out in
advance, and it’s a good thing too. Probably Goldberg’s best match, too.
- Bottom Line: Mixed bag. The Turner Home Video
version cuts out some crap, making the tape three hours, but the PPV version is
some three and a half, so I can only judge the video one. The first three
matches are very good, but the rest sucks up until the main event. And when
this show sucks, it REALLY sucks. Not to mention all the damn filler this show
has.
- Neutral Feelings. Not enough good stuff to like it,
not enough bad stuff to hate it.
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