WWF Monday Night RAW (June 6, 1994)

Original Airdate: June 6, 1994 (Taped May 23)

From Youngstown, Ohio; Your Hosts are Vince McMahon and Randy Savage. Bless Savage for at least caring enough to change outfits each week (even down to the hand wraps!) to give the illusion that this shit hasn’t been in the can for weeks.

Opening King of the Ring Qualifying Lumberjack Match: Tatanka v Crush: Weird start, as Tatanka gets distracted by lumberjack IRS and jumped into an armbar, which Crush just casually holds while all the lumberjacks pile into the ring. Once they're cleared out, Crush hammers him in the corner, and hits a hiptoss before tossing Tatanka out for the heel lumberjacks to stomp. Inside, Crush covers for two, then slaps on a chinlock. Tatanka powers out, but Crush cuts him off with a headbutt and a bodyslam, but a kneedrop misses, and Tatanka hits a Japanese armdrag. Hiptoss, and a dropkick knocks Crush out in front of the babyface lumberjacks. Inside, that gets two. Off WHAT?! I get it when the heel does it, but when the face does it, the good guys just roll him back in without any cheapshots, so what's he covering off of? Armbar, so Crush counters into an armbreaker, but Tatanka won't quit, so Crush delivers a backbreaker for two. Another armbreaker, but Tatanka powers up, and clotheslines him for two. Backelbow for two, but he's too slow in following up again, and Crush hits an inverted atomic drop for two. Back to the armbreaker. You know, it's one thing to bore a crowd, but it takes a special kind of asshole to be this boring when all of your coworkers are being forced to watch instead of spending time stretching, or eating, or playing with their shits or whatever goes on in the locker room normally. Tatanka escapes, but gets distracted by IRS again, and Crush headbutts him down for two. Crush wrenches on a bodyscissors, but Tatanka escapes, and this time manages a few tomahawk chops, followed by a bodyslam for two. Chops leave Crush tied in the ropes for a beating, but Tatanka walks into another inverted atomic drop, and Crush adds a 2^nd rope pointed elbowdrop. Series of kicks get two, and he slaps on a front-facelock. Oh, just get on with it already! Out to the floor for another heel beat down, but the faces step in this time, and it's a brawl on the floor. They quickly settle down, but Crush still gets two out of it on the inside. Nervehold. Poor Bam Bam Bigelow looks like he's moments from falling asleep, and Yokozuna desperately needs to sit down. Vertical suplex sets up a legdrop for two, but Tatanka dumps him on a fluke. The face lumberjacks pile on, but Crush shrugs them all off like they're jobbers. God, with babyface cover like that, no wonder he sold out to Ted DiBiase before the summer was out. Lex Luger runs down and hits him with the loaded forearm for a knockout (waking up the crowd), and they roll him back in for Tatanka to cover at 21:00. Way too long, this was just resthold after resthold for twenty minutes. ¼*

King of the Ring Report! I know no one wanted to see the blowoff, but damned if those Roddy Piper videos to promote the Lawler match aren't fantastic

Bam Bam Bigelow v John Paul: Hopefully Bigelow did a couple of lines backstage, and can stay awake through this one. Paul tries a headlock, but Bigelow shrugs him off - only to miss a splash. Paul with an armbar, but Bigelow bodyslams his way out, and hits a falling headbutt. Coke kicked in, I guess. Dropkick, as Vince shutters at the thought of Hilary Clinton as president. Well, she's no Jack Tunney. Paul tries coming back with a sunset flip, but gets smacked down, and splash at 2:42. The commentary is literally the only interesting thing about these squashes, and I'll miss Savage when he's gone in a few months. DUD

WrestleMania Revenge Tour promo

In New York City this afternoon, WWF superstars boarded the USS Intrepid for a tug-of-war with members of the US military, commemorating the 50th anniversary of D-Day. Not sure how a tug-of-war between a bunch of mostly American wrestlers and some Army guys connects to D-Day, but hey, it happened

Jerry Lawler hosts the Kings Court, with special guest Roddy Piper! Oh, but instead, it's a scrawny teen dressed like Piper - who does a pretty good impression. Loved it as a kid, still like it a lot now

Razor Ramon v Keith Davis: Davis is Jeff Hardy, early in his career. Lots of empty seats visible by this point - these endless taping cycles are just too tedious to sit through for the promise of a Doink/Jeff Jarrett match at the end. Razor slaps him around in the corner to start, and counters a bodypress attempt with a blockbuster. Abdominal stretch, and he slaps Keith around for a bit before finishing with the Razors Edge at 4:01. This is another of those matches that's only interesting retroactively. DUD

Paul Bearer expresses doubts at Ted DiBiase's claims that he's bought the services of The Undertaker

Ted DiBiase comes out, and promises to deliver The Undertaker this weekend on Superstars

BUExperience: Do you really have to ask?