ECW Eastern Championship Wrestling (June 29, 1993)

Original Airdate: June 29, 1993 (taped May 15)

 

From Philadelphia, Pennsylvania; Your Hosts are Jay Sulli and Paul E. Dangerously. Oddly, they're already hyping up the September super card in front of the live crowd, despite this episode being taped a month before Super Summer Sizzler Spectacular

 

In a pre-taped segment, Sulli is hanging out with Tod Gordon, looking like they should be sitting on Adirondack Chairs somewhere. Is Jay even wearing shoes? They talk about Super Summer Sizzler, as well as hype up future 'house shows.' The sound here is especially poor, with Sulli not holding the microphone steady, causing the sound to go from really loud to almost silent all the time. So Tod is fuming about the finish of the Texas Chain match between Terry Funk and Eddie Gilbert, and apparently Eddie is running around Philadelphia in a cape and crown, chasing people out of Gordon's pawn shop. Now there's an image. This leads to clips of the match, followed by Funk swearing revenge. Why isn't he facing the camera? He proposes a Hair v Mask match against Dark Patriot, though he sounds like a raving lunatic drunk more than anything else

 

Glen Osbourne and Herve Renesto v Ivan Koloff and Vladimir Koloff: Ivan is announced as a 'former WWF Champion' here, and he celebrates by whipping his chain on the mat. But why are they announced as from the 'Soviet Union?' It's 1993, that's not even a place! Herve starts with Vladimir, and gets dominated. Vladimir works the arm, then over to Ivan to apply a bearhug. Herve makes Sean Waltman look like John Tenta. The Koloff's keep cutting the ring in half, and Vladimir suplexes Herve into a submission hold at 3:20. Glen didn't even tag in here. DUD

 

Just as Tod talked about earlier, Eddie Gilbert is indeed walking around Philadelphia like Frank Costanza's lawyer, and we have footage to prove it. Oh, bless them. Just when I thought this show had no redeeming qualities, we get some batshit fun from Eddie to change my mind

 

Tony Stetson v Larry Winters: Winters attacks, beating Tony to the outside, and putting the boots to him out there. Winters uses a chair, and then drops Tony across the guardrail, before taking him inside for a ropechoke. Some poor kids in the crowd look like they're just waiting for Bret Hart or Randy Savage to show up, and they're losing hope by the second. Reminds me of when I was a kid, and we went vacationing in New Hampshire, and saw an add for live wrestling, which had pictures of various WWF stars. I wanted to go so badly, but thank goodness my parents weren't into it, considering there was no way in hell anyone employed by the WWF had anything to do with that show. Tony fights him off and grabs a chair to get a little payback, but both guys start decking the referee, and he throws the match out at 3:24. I get that finish for the live crowd (since this was taped before Super Summer Sizzler, which was supposed to feature the blow off), but it came off like shit for the TV audience. ¼*

 

ECW Television Title Match: Jimmy Snuka v Tommy Cairo: Tommy's ECW Pennsylvania State title is not on the line. Is it ever? Paul notes that the TV title signifies that Snuka is the "best wrestler on ECW television today." What's that make the ECW champion, then? Cairo gets the best of a criss cross, and a bodyslam leads to a spinheel kick to put the champion on the outside. Back in, Snuka chops him down, but he telegraphs a backdrop, and Cairo suplexes him. Cairo with a backdrop, but Jimmy blocks a bulldog, and hits a high knee for two. ECW Champion Don Muraco trips Cairo up during another criss cross, and Snuka uses a backbreaker to set up the Superfly Splash at 4:32. Snuka got some serious air on that splash, though. Afterwards, Terry Funk comes out to snitch to the referee about Muraco's interference, and this asshole moron actually reverses the decision, awarding Cairo the bout by DQ. Well, that was a fucking stupid finish. ¼*

 

Backstage, Salvatore Bellomo is on drugs. Or, well, I hope he is, because otherwise there's no excuse for literally anything he's doing or saying

 

Meanwhile, Sir Richard Michaels things Bellomo is an idiot. Well, he's got a point

 

Sir Richard Michaels v Salvatore Bellomo: Michaels looks like he's trying to be both a Rocker and Freebird, but couldn't decide, so just decided to suck instead. Paul talks shit about Jim Cornette on commentary, which I don't think was actually building to anything. Michaels with a dropkick and a bodyslam in the early going, as Paul keeps calling Bellomo 'Botchagalloop,' which, honestly, is fantastic. That should be his name from now on. Michaels misses a corner charge, and takes a bump over the top, and Bellomo takes control. Bellomo with an avalanche, but a second misses, and Michaels tries a leveraged pin, but gets busted at two. His own corner charge hits boot, however, and Bellomo hooks a leveraged pin at 4:09. Botchagalloop! Afterwards, the Suicide Blonds attack for some triple teaming, but the Super Destroyers make the save. ¼*

 

BUExperience: Despite being in the can since well before Super Summer Sizzler Spectacular, I thought this felt a lot more fresh than last week’s show. It wasn’t good (or even remotely good), but it wasn’t horrible, and that’s something.