WWF Superstars (January 16, 1993)

Original Airdate: January 16, 1993 (taped December 14, 1992)

 

From Green Bay, Wisconsin; Your Hosts are Vince McMahon, Randy Savage, and Jerry Lawler

 

WWF Champion is still fuming about Razor Ramon's attack on Owen Hart, and he's literally promising to kill him

 

Razor Ramon v Buck Zumhofe: Buck seems to be half asleep out there, and can't even properly take stuff as simple as a chokeslam or side superplex. And he's playing completely dead between moves. Razor's Edge finishes at 1:10. And then he plays dead after the finish, too. This was really bad, but thankfully it was short. DUD

 

Gene Okerlund is in the control center to remind us the Kamala is a babyface now

 

The Nasty Boys v Mickey Jay and Rock Warner: You know, it's probably a good thing Hulk Hogan came back and took the tag title spot for WrestleMania, because the Nasty Boys are not exactly lighting the world on fire as babyfaces here. More like babyfeces. Jerry Sags with the flying elbowdrop at 3:28. DUD

 

Ray Rougeau brings WWF Intercontinental Champion Shawn Michaels out so Shawn can try and gaslight us into thinking Marty Jannetty is crazy. Come on now, Shawn... who could ever believe that?

 

Crush v WT Jones: This has been a pretty dull episode thus far this week, the last in the taping cycle, and even the announcers don't have much to talk about outside of general Royal Rumble hype. Luckily Doink shows up during the match, but the poor guy's arm is in a sling following his altercation with Crush last week. The big man just doesn't know his own strength, I guess. Crush with the headvice at 2:00. Afterwards, Crush passes Doink in the aisle on his way to the back, and Doink wants to give him a flower as a peace offering. Crush accepts, but then as soon as he turns his back, Doink pulls his false arm out of the sling, and viciously beats him down with it. This was a pretty good angle, and Crush does a stretcher job to sell it. It's also notable how incredibly concerned Randy Savage sounds about his buddy on commentary, though he does nothing to actually, you know, help. No wonder Crush snapped after the same thing happened again a year later. DUD

 

Typhoon doesn't care who has to throw out, he's winning the Royal Rumble. Even if it's Earthquake, it's every man for himself

 

Papa Shango is going to curse his way to Rumble victory

 

Mr. Perfect is back, and the Rumble is right 'down' his alley. Well, at least he actually came in second once

 

Bam Bam Bigelow's head is on fire, and Big Boss Man had better recognize

 

Backstage, Crush is being loaded into the ambulance, as Lawler works on what would become his 'Owen Voice.' Apparently, Crush still hasn't regained consciousness yet, and yeah, I'm pretty sure he's brain dead now.

 

Yokozuna v Carl Almont: The announcers wonder how anyone could hope to get Yokozuna over the top rope in the Rumble match, with Macho noting that Crush could probably do it. Well, with that kind of strategy, no wonder Randy crashed and burned so badly. Yokozuna with the Banzai Drop at 1:22. DUD

 

Backstage, Crush is still not conscious. Maybe hurry up and get him to the damn hospital already?

 

Okerlund is in the studio with the Royal Rumble Report. It's crazy how they had much shorter shows in 1993, but still found the time to list all thirty combatants one by one

 

Crush is still on his way to the ambulance, as Lawler drops the heel act because he's so concerned. Well, he sure got over that by SummerSlam, didn't he?

 

Tatanka v Tom Bennett: Lawler wonders if Tatanka has 'Technicolor dandruff.' Glad to see the King got his smile back. The fake crowd noise is running wild during this one, and Tatanka finishes with End of the Trail at 1:17. Nobody was getting paid by the hour this week, that much is for sure. DUD

 

Undertaker is downright jazzed at the prospects of the mass grave he's digging for the Rumble

 

Repo Man would like to repossess the WWF Title. Re?

 

The Steiner Brothers are looking for the finest competition in the world, and that's why they're very excited to be facing... the Beverly Brothers

 

BUExperience: The Crush/Doink angle was pretty big and memorable, but everything else was extremely dull this week, as they just did a bunch of generic Rumble build.