WWF RAW is WAR (August 11, 1997)

Original Airdate: August 11, 1997

 

From Biloxi, Mississippi; Your Hosts are Vince McMahon, Jim Ross, and Jerry Lawler

 

Ross brings Shawn Michaels out, and why's he slapping hands like a babyface? He'll be facing Mankind tonight, but before he talks about that, he wants to talk about Undertaker, since he's going to make 'Taker his bitch at In Your House. Well, that remains to be seen. He's also pissy that he found out about his match while watching Superstars, since Vince didn't have the guts to call him and tell him. He thinks it's all a conspiracy against him, though note how different his take is than Bret Hart's similar one earlier in the year. Both were great angles with similar underpinnings, but totally different, and both got over huge. All this draws Commissioner Sgt. Slaughter out to deny any bias, but Shawn isn't buying it, and promises an insurance policy tonight. Sid's coming back AGAIN??

 

Earlier today, fans outside the building were certainly not concerned with their dental health

 

Backstage, the Legion of Doom whip a trash can to get warmed up for their match

 

Henry Godwinn clarifies that a Country Whipping match is what all Southerners do to settle disputes. Ross then clarifies that this is correct

 

Country Whipping Match: Hawk v Henry Godwinn: WWF European Champion Davey Boy Smith and Owen Hart join us for commentary here. The gimmick here is that both guys are armed with straps, and whoever can force the other guy to retreat to the outside of the ring is the winner. Hawk clotheslines him down and unloads with the strap, and Vince is seemingly trying to use the phrase 'country whipping strap' as many times per minutes as humanly possible. Hawk chokes him with the strap and puts the boots to him, as Owen notes that the only 'straps' they're interested in are the tag title, not 'whipping each other like a couple of morons.' Man has a point. Henry turns the tide and ropechokes him some, then uses a bodyslam to set up a fistdrop. Godwinn uses the strap, and this thing is just dragging on forever. Godwinn with a cross corner whip, but the charge in hits boot, and Hawk dives with a flying clothesline. That draws Phineas Godwinn in to help his partner, and they double team, but Animal runs in to make the save, and he clotheslines Henry over the top at 3:47. This was straight up terrible. –½*

 

Get your Stridex WWF trading cards, at discount stores everywhere!

 

Backstage, Slaughter brings Brian Pillman another dress for tonight. Dude should really hire himself an assistant. Also, why does Pillman have his own dressing room, separate from the rest of the Harts? Actually, after hearing that JR story about him proudly showing off his 'toilet snakes,' maybe it's not so surprising

 

Scott Putski v Tony Williams: Goldust and Marlena show up to do commentary on this one, with Vince calling them the 'most glamorous couple in the WWF.' As opposed to who? Criss cross to start, won by Putski with a clothesline. Hiptoss and a German suplex turn Tony inside out, and Scott adds a backbreaker for two. Hanging vertical suplex connects, as Goldust unveils hidden camera footage of Pillman flipping out about his dress in the back. It's like the prequel to GTV! Putski continues to work Tony over in dull fashion, but a corner charge misses, and Tony manages a suplex. Cross corner whip rebounds Putski into a clothesline, and Tony delivers a Russian legsweep for two. Rana, but Putski counters with a sitout powerbomb, and he makes a comeback. Polish Hammer finishes at 3:32. This was technically fine, but it wasn't connecting with the crowd at all, and the announcers weren't even paying attention to it anyway. Afterwards, Slaughter comes down to send Goldust and Marlena to the back, which seems like a pretty relaxed reaction to his antics. ¾*

 

Undertaker lets Shawn know that the only 'insurance policy' he'll need at Ground Zero is burial insurance

 

In this month's RAW Magazine, excerpts of the letter Goldust sent his father. What a weird angle

 

Brian Pillman v Flash Funk: Brian takes out his frustrations with the dress on Funk at the bell, as the announcers hype up Hardcore Heaven. Pillman puts the boots to him, as Slaughter split screens in to book Bulldog and Owen against Patriot and a partner of his choosing for later. Pillman tries a clothesline, but Funk ducks, and rebounds with a spinkick. Funk with an avalanche, and a flying bodypress for two. Bodyslam sets up a flying moonsault, but Brian lifts his knees to block, and delivers a DDT. He looks to have it wrapped up, but Goldust shows up at the entrance to distract him, showing the footage of Pillman getting dressed earlier. That allows Flash to recover, and an inside cradle puts it away at 3:15. This could have been a legitimately great match a few years earlier, but Pillman was so broken down by this point, and it was more about the angle anyway. ¼*

 

Earlier today, fans outside of the building chanted for Dude Love. I assume for the Mick Foley character, but by the looks of some of them, might be for something else

 

Vince brings WWF Tag Team Champion Dude Love out to talk about partner Steve Austin's condition, and Dude thinks Steve will be back in action to help defend the tag title soon. Vince wonders who will win between Mankind and Shawn Michaels tonight, and Dude, shockingly, would put his money on Mankind. So all that draws Shawn onto the TitanTron, and he's sick of this whole split personality deal, but he's going to have his insurance policy with him, so he's not worried about him anyway

 

Outside, the fans have some serious accents

 

Backstage, Patriot has found a partner, but a convenient camera angle blocks us from seeing who. Ah, I see we're getting into the stupid 'invisible camera man' era of this show, which still exists to this day

 

The Stridex Triple Action is Patriot winning a battle royal on Shotgun Saturday Night

 

Davey Boy Smith and Owen Hart v Patriot and Ken Shamrock: Vince notes that this crowd is the 'personification of freedom.' Ken is over pretty big here, actually. Owen starts with him, and they square off for a while, teasing some sparring. Ken gets a couple of takedowns, as we get a shot of WWF Champion Bret Hart watching from the back. Ken hooks a cradle for two, and a leg lariat connects. Tag to Patriot for a backelbow, so Owen passes to Bulldog, and the Allied Powers EXPLODE!! Hey, who knows, it could be Lex Luger under that mask. You don't know. Patriot works the arm, as a sign in the crowd notes that 'Turtle fears Bobby.' The guy from Entourage? Back to Ken, but Davey wants no part of him, and scurries away to a tag, as Bret shows up to watch from the entrance. Considering the size of that TV they had for him in the back, who can blame him? The Foundation get control on Shamrock, and cut the ring in half, and Vince is surprised that they're able to dominate Ken like this. Yeah, two veterans and multi-time former world tag champions dominating a first year rookie, shocking. Ken fights off a double team long enough for the hot tag, and Roseanne Barr the door! Patriot powerslams Davey for two, and the flying shoulderblock is worth two. Corner charge hits boot, however, and both guys collide for a double knockout. That draws Bret down, but Slaughter blocks his path, and Patriot delivers the Uncle Slam at 9:54. This was solid enough, and Patriot was actually getting over with the crowd, so mission accomplished. * ¾

 

In Canada last week, Bret Hart received a hero's welcome after winning the WWF Title at SummerSlam. Sorry, THE SummerSlam. Forgot, they're Canadians

 

Backstage, Shawn is talking to his insurance policy, which is pretty obviously Rick Rude, even without seeing his face. Just how many times was Rude a surprise in his career? '91 WCW. '97 ECW. '97 WWF. Okay, so three. Three is the answer

 

Backstage, Patriot promises to use the momentum of tonight's win to take the WWF Title at Ground Zero. Bret responds by hitting him with a chair. "What a cheap shot," notes Vince. Cheap shot? The guy was talking about taking his property, and Bret is the bad one?

 

Faarooq v Chainz: Well, this should be a fun one to type. Faarooq tries a sneak attack, but Chainz fights him off. Backdrop, but Faarooq blocks, and he puts the boots to him. Chainz fights back with a small package for two, so Faarooq cuts him off with a shoulderblock, and in a weird bit, he sets Chainz up for the electric chair counter spot that he does in every single match, but Chainz just walks away. Like, literally stood up, and walked away. Chainz with a bodyslam and an elbowdrop, followed by a facebuster. Clothesline ends up taking the referee down along with Faarooq, and there's no one to count. Cue Rocky Maivia doing a run-in from the crowd, and he hits Chainz with a uranage, allowing Faarooq the pin at 2:56. Afterwards, Rocky raises his fist, officially joining the Nation of Domination. This seemed like a huge demotion at the time, but he certainly turned it into gold, and the group actually got a lot more interesting after the Gang Warz shit ended. DUD

 

Backstage, the DOA are trying to break the Nation's door down

 

Sable comes out. Dances around. Leaves

 

Patriot comes out to complain about the supposed 'cheap shot' Bret took at him earlier, and he wants him right now. Bret comes out to give it to him, actually showing up alone, and getting his ass handed to him. Did he think he was still a babyface, or something? Because there's no excuse for showing up alone in that sort of situation otherwise. Thankfully, the rest of the Foundation show up to make the save, and they wreck Patriot - all while Lawler sings the US National Anthem on commentary

 

Mankind hopes that Shawn's insurance policy is life insurance, because he's going down. Life, burial... poor Shawn is getting cleaned out this week

 

Brakus is extremely German

 

Shawn Michaels v Mankind: Mankind brings a trash can in with him, but Shawn fights him off, and covers him over with it to set up a flying axehandle. Mankind fights back with a Mandible Claw, as Ross again shills for ECW's pay per view. They spill to the outside, where Shawn takes a trip into the steps, and Mankind adds a hotshot into the guardrail. He tries a charge, but Shawn backdrops him onto the announce table to block, and HBK dives with an elbowdrop from the apron onto the table. Shawn chucks him into the steps before taking it back inside for a bodyslam, and he lands a flying elbowdrop. Superkick, but Mankind counters with the Claw again, so Shawn falls to the outside to try and escape, but Mankind keeps the hold on as they tumble. Michaels bashes his head into the post a few time to shake him off, and a side suplex onto the announce table follows. That is one durable table. Meanwhile, Hunter Hearst Helmsley and Chyna show up at ringside, as Shawn pulls Mankind's mask off, and mocks him with it. Inside, Shawn beats on him with his own mask, and he tries a sleeper, but Mankind drops into the corner to fight him off. Shawn is still getting the babyface reaction here, which is pretty funny, considering they were falling over themselves to get him over as a face in 1996 by making him into the least cool wrestler alive, and now that he's gotten his edge back, he's just that. Michaels with a bootchoke in the corner, but Mankind comes back with a spinebuster to set up mounted punches. He unloads in the corner ahead of a running kneesmash, and a cross corner whip flips HBK in the corner, as Rick Rude shows up at ringside as well. Mankind with the double-arm DDT for two, so HHH trips him up as he runs the ropes, and Rude adds a nasty chair shot. That allows Michaels to deliver the Superkick, and we're out at 10:42. This was fine, though not in the same league as their pay per view match from '96. Afterwards, Shawn celebrates with his new crew, but Undertaker shows up to test out that insurance policy. He advances, but gets distracted by Paul Bearer popping up on the TitanTron, and promising that Kane's arrival is imminent. ** ¼

 

BUExperience: Definitely some good stuff mixed in, but man, there’s still a lot of crap too.

 

Monday Night Wars Rating Chart

	8/11/97
Show	RAW	Nitro
Rating	2.9	3.8
Total Wins	17	74
Win Streak		57
Better Show (as of 8/4)	38	49