WWF Monday Night RAW (April 26, 1993)

Original Airdate: April 26, 1993

From New York, New York; Your Hosts are Vince McMahon, Bobby Heenan, and Randy Savage.

Opening Match: Mr. Perfect v Damien Demento: Perfect has trouble getting Demento's attention ('cause he's demented, you see), but manages to get him into a criss cross, and dropkicks him to the floor. Demento seems more concerned with the voices in his head though, and Perfect gets him in a hammerlock on the way back in, only to get dumped to the floor - taking out a camera guy on the way. Back in, Demento hits a cross corner whip, with Perfect only giving him a half-hearted oversell. Perfect comes back with a kneelift, and hits the somersault necksnap, but charges into a gutpunch. Damian splashes him, but Perfect blocks with the knees, and finishes with the Perfect-Plex at 4:55. Watchable. ¾*

And now, one of the cheesiest segments in WWE history, as some little girl whose school Randy Savage adopted (oh lord...) wrote an essay on the dangers of drugs. So, we get the kid reading the essay, on a totally black stage with a solitary spotlight, since OH MY GOD. Oh, and then at the end, the light pans over to show that the Undertaker is standing next to the girl, and glaring at her, to illustrate that drugs will kill you. If you think they're annoyingly self serving with this shit today, no amount of pink ring ropes or Make-a-Wish segments top THIS for sheer insanity. I mean, they had me at 'Randy Savage adopts a school,' really.

Fat RAW Girl Sign of the Week: Deep Down Everyone Is RAW

Lex Luger v Crush: Crush tries to overpower him in the early going, so Luger calls for a test-of-strength, and wrenches him down. Crush responds with a press slam, which is just weird to see someone do to Lex Luger. Lex doesn't know what to make of it either, and bails up the aisle for a while to regroup. Back in, Crush dropkicks him out of a criss cross, and hits a pair of armdrags ahead of a wristlock. Luger tries a hiptoss, but Crush counters into a belly-to-belly suplex for two - only to miss a cross corner charge, and get kicked out of the ring. Luger follows with an axehandle off of the apron, and then scoops him up for a ram into the post. Inside, Lex hugs him like a bear, and hits a powerslam for two. Vertical suplex, but Crush reverses, and then adds a side suplex. Bodyslam and a legdrop get two, so Crush slaps on the Kona Crush to finish, but ends up getting distracted by Doink out in the crowd. Crush takes his attention off of Luger to shout at Doink, and gets blasted with Luger's loaded forearm smash - Crush counted out at 13:00. Well, you knew that finish was coming, given how strongly both guys were getting pushed at this point. They'd do this again plenty of times when the heel/face roles were reversed later, but I think this is the only time I remember seeing them go at it in these gimmicks. Fun power match, too. * ¾

King of the Ring Promo

Mr. Hughes v Jason Knight: Hughes just unloads on poor Knight with forearms, and slams him, as Bobby Heenan sets up another TV above his monitor to see what else is on, and ends up watching the 'Baby Got Back' music video. Where's Jerry Lawler when you really need him, right? Meanwhile, Hughes hits a backbreaker, follows with a big boot, and finishes with a scrapbuster at 2:07. DUD

Smoking Gunns vignette. They're cowboys! They ride tall in the saddle!

Vince McMahon brings WWF Intercontinental Champion Shawn Michaels out for an in-ring interview to discuss his upcoming match with Jim Duggan. They crowd just blasts him with a hella loud 'Shawn is Gay' chant, but Michaels shrugs it off and segues to talking about Mr. Perfect - leading to a brawl when Perfect comes down to retort.

Let's go back to Superstars, where over the weekend, Bam Bam Bigelow threatened to beat Sherri during an interview, so Tatanka made the save, and brawled with Bigelow. Cut to later, as Tatanka was scheduled to wrestle, but Bigelow attacked him backstage, and CUT OFF A SMALL LOCK OF HIS HAIR! Holy shit!

Typhoon v Skull Von Krus: Skull rakes the eyes at the bell, but gets reversed through a cross corner whip, and backdropped. Typhoon with a slam, but misses an elbowdrop, and Krus works the leg as Jim Duggan calls into the show to threaten Shawn Michaels. Skull with about a dozen eye rakes, but gets reversed into the corner again, and avalanched. Typhoon adds a splash, and covers for the pin at 2:37. Typhoon wasn't going anywhere by this point, and Krus was just enchantment talent, so this was pretty much a waste of time. DUD

Bobby Heenan finds a couple in the front row, where the gentlemen (who looks like a cross between Kevin Smith and Bill Cosby) surprises his gal (a cross between fat and really fat) with a proposal. Heenan laying into them ('how many men have you been with before him?') is always hilarious, though.

BUExperience: Much better episode this week. No classic matches, but the show had a much more lively atmosphere now that they were back in the City, and Luger/Crush is worth a look. Things should start to pick up now that King of the Ring is getting closer, as well.