Sunday, April 27, 2014

HITMAN383 Rant for WWF Judgment Day 2000



- The HITMAN383 Rant for WWF Judgment Day, 2000! This show took place in May, and was considered a kick ass show by all who reviewed it at the time, with the Iron Man Match being called “legendary.” Under those credits, I went out and bought it. A full $25.00 at Tower Video. $25.00. IT DAMN WELL BETTER BE LEGENDARY! (This is another one I haven’t gotten around to doing a BUExperience on, and this was originally written in October 2000. Fear not though, I have the Network now. I don’t have to rely on Tower Video to get shit done anymore)


- BTW, I will be making a guest appearance on www.rantcentral.net on Thursday, October 19th, or Friday the 20th, depending when they post it =).

- Don’t get me wrong, I love all these new areas to write for, but don’t forget your MAIN HITMAN383 INFO CENTER is still HITMAN383’s Rant Center!

- Enough Ego Stroking… (Nah, keep going)

- BTW, I use this system: ***** - Excellent, **** - Great, *** - Good, **- Okay, * - Decent, DUD - Awful.

- Live from Louisville, Kentucky.

- Your Hosts are Jim Ross and Jerry Lawler.

- We start off with a neat little promo of all the things that go down in an hour. Really gets you thinking, and gets you JAKKED for the Main Event.

- Vince McMahon gets the troops psyched up backstage, and sends out Brisco to get coffee. Jerry was the hardcore champ at this point, and gets assaulted by the Headbangers, who try to beat him for it.

- Opening Match: Edge, Christian and Kurt Angle vs. Rikishi and Too Cool: Oddly enough, Rikishi doesn’t run anyone down on the way to the ring. The heels jump the faces, but it fails, and all three hit the checks of fire! Grandmaster and Edge officially start, and Brian hits an enzuguri. Scotty tags in, and they hit the “homie” elbow. Christian gets in, and a criss cross leads to Scotty hitting a suplex, but some dancing allows Christian to kick his ass. He tries to whip Scotty to the corner, but Grandmaster lay’s on the ropes to block it. Edge tries the same, but it backfires, and Too Cool double team them while the fans chant for Rikishi. The heel bail, so Brian dances, but loses his pants. Making Fun of follows. Rikishi gets in and kicks EVERYONE’S ass, but misses a butt drop on Angle. Kurt kicks ass, and E&C work in some 80’s style double-teaming in the corner. Rikishi fights back, however, and tags Hotty, who hits a bulldog, but Kurt clotheslines him to stop a ‘Worm’ attempt. Brawl erupts, but the ref. clears everyone out, and Edge works Scotty over, who is now Ricky Morton. Angle gets in, and hits a nice suplex for two. Christian tags, and screws up a powerbomb (intentionally, not a screw up screw up) and Scotty hotshots him. Rikishi tags in, and AGAIN kills everybody. Checks of Fire for all three heels, and Too Cool work over the Tag Champs while Rikishi delivers a Stinky Face to Kurt. Scotty hits the Worm on Edge (getting a massive pop), and Sexay hits a superkick. Christian runs in with the ring bell, and clobbers Rikishi, but Brian hits a Tennessee Jam to break up the pin, and Rikishi easily pins Edge at 9:42, getting a great pop. The crowd was HOT here! Good match, too, *** ½.

- Michael Cole speaks with the special ref. for the Iron Man Match tonight, Shawn Michaels! Shawn say’s he’s gonna call it down the middle, and that’s all there is too it. He even states what we all know, when questioned about internet rumor’s of him being jealous of the Rock, “If it’s on the internet it’s GOTTA be true!” (At the time, it probably was true. Not the brightest period for HBK, sadly)

- WWF European Title, Triple Threat Match: Eddie Guerrero vs. Dean Malenko vs. Perry Saturn: Dean and Perry double team Eddie to start, hitting a HUGE “Demolition Deception” move, (I’m assuming I meant Decapitator there, because the only Demolition Deception I remember was at SummerSlam ’90, when they hid underneath the ring. And I don’t think that happened here, but maybe) with Saturn hitting an AMAZING top rope knee. The height he gets is SCARY. Saturn turns on Dean quickly, however, and they have a mini-match, with Saturn hitting a DVD like move. Eddie uses a Flair-like low blow to get control, and spinkicks Saturn, and rana’s Dean, and then Saturn gets one! Dean with a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker, for two, and Saturn nails him, getting HIS turn to beat up Guerrero. Dean tires to powerbomb the Latino Heat, but Eddie rolls into a sunset flip, but Dean turns THAT into a Boston Crab. Saturn breaks it up, and Eddie tries to superplex Dean, but Saturn stops it, and suplexes Eddie. Dean, however, is still on the top, so Saturn goes up, but Dean drops him on his face! Eddie goes up to try HIS luck, but Dean hits a gutbuster from the top! WHOA! Saturn heads upstairs, and hits a suicide splash on Guerrero for two, and Eddie hits a DDT on Perry for two. Dean tries the crossface, so Eddie dropkicks him in the face, and everyone brawls. Saturn takes a spill to the floor, and Dean hits a side suplex, and goes to the top, and hits a splash for two. Another brawl erupts, and they REALLY impress me with a triple side suplex. Now THAT was cool. Saturn bails, again, and Chyna clobbers him, then does the same to Dean, and Eddie gets the pin to retain at 7:54. Terrific match here, ****.

- Brisco has hidden in the bathroom to evade all the people after him (and his hardcore belt), but scares himself in the mirror nearly getting knocked out in the process.

- Falls Count Anywhere Match: Shane McMahon vs. The Big Show: I am not a big Shane McMahon fan, but you GOTTA dig the t-shirts he wears to the ring! (What?! Who couldn’t love Shane-o-Mac?!) Shane impresses me off the bat, diving over the top on Wight as he makes his entrance, but Paul catches him and gets violent. He kicks Shane’s ass in the ring (literally), and continues the assault, but out runs Boss Man who goes to work on the Show with his Nightstick. Paul shrugs him off, however, and hits a big powerbomb, but here’s T&A, who also get their asses handed to them. Trish tries to stop him with a low blow, but it backfires and Big Show slams her to the floor! Holy Crap, the crowd is ON FIRE here. Through all this, Shane is crawling away to the back, but Big Show stops him by the entrance and kicks his ass there! Show then rips apart the set, and makes EXTRA EFFORT to make it look like the piece he picks up to whack Shane with is REALLY heavy, but then Test runs over and nonchalantly picks it up. Sure, expose the business Andrew! Shane, Test and Albert work on the Show, but he comes back and WATCH EVERONE BUMP! Unfortunately for him, out runs Bull, who pounds the Show, allowing Shane to drop a speaker on his knee, and smash a block over his head to get the pin at 7:15, by the entrance way. Okay little match, **.

- Brisco walks into the referee’s lounge to take a rest, but they try to get a pin on him TOO, so he gets pissed and leaves.

- WWF Intercontinental Title, Submission Match: Chris Benoit vs. Chris Jericho: Let the workrate begin! BTW, I HATE the current IC belt. It looks so … small. Especially on Benoit, for some reason. I miss the old one that they used from ‘88-’98. (Yeah, I hate the Oval IC. I know they wanted to make the World Title bigger than the IC (since that was a frequent complaint with the 90s versions), but they way overcompensated, as the Big Eagle was gigantic, and the Oval IC was tiny) Benoit starts by hammering on Jericho, and laying in with the chops. Neat criss cross leads to Jericho hitting a bulldog, and some big chops in the corner. Jericho with a cross corner whip, and Jericho hooks him in an arm bar. They fight over a tombstone, but Benoit wins and turns it into a shoulder breaker. Benoit hits the flying headbutt early, and hooks a nice submission hold. Jericho fights out, and tries to hook the Walls of Jericho, but Benoit flips him out, in a nice spot. Chris hits his patented springboard dropkick, leaving Benoit on the floor, and he follows outside with chops. Unfortunately, he WALKED out, instead of FLYING out. (I was really obsessed with people flying at that point, apparently) Benoit reverses a whip, knocking Jericho to the steps, and works the shoulder, but Jericho comes back fast, and drops him on the knee that Bob Holly hurt on Smackdown. Back in, and Jericho hits a Tigerdriver, and covers, but no count. Chopfest ensues, which Jericho wins, but he misses a charge in the corner, and Benoit takes off the turnbuckle pad. Well, mostly off. Benoit isn’t to good at that, is he? He rams Chris’s bad shoulder to it, and hooks a submission hold targeting it. Snap suplex by Benoit, and he drops a knee WITH THE BAD KNEE! D’oh! He hooks an arm-bar, but Y2J makes the ropes, so Benoit hits some knees to the face, again USING THE BAD KNEE. What’s with you, Crippler? Jericho uses a legwhip to take him down, and pounds on Benoit’s knee, then removes the knee brace. Whipping with the brace occurs. He tries a figure four, but Benoit hits some STIFF kicks to the head to stop it, but Jericho hits a Lionsault anyway! He hooks Benoit over the ropes, and applies a SWEET ASS Tarantula on the Crippler. Chris yells in pain, but fights out, only to miss an enzuguri, but hit the rolling German suplexes! On the third one, however, Chris escapes, and goes for the Walls of Jericho, but Benoit counters into the Crossface! Jericho struggles in it for a bit, and almost makes the ropes, so Benoit breaks the old, drags him back, and hooks it again! All this is done while pounding on the bad shoulder, to add to the fact! Jericho spends about another minute in the hold, until he passes out from the pain, and Benoit wins to retain at 13:32. Great match here, **** ¼.

- Michael Cole speaks with Hardcore Champion Jerry Brisco, but during the interview two arena workers jump him and try to win the belt. It doesn’t quite work out.

- Tag Team Table Match: The Dudley Boyz vs. X-Pac and Road Dogg: Oh great … DX. Trained in ruining the flow of ANY PPV!! The Dudley’s are pretty over at this point, but not the insane levels of today. D-Von starts with the Dogg, and a criss cross leads to Dudley hitting a shoulderblock, and then a reverse elbow. X-Pac tags in, and he gets a shoulderblock too, and in comes Buh Buh. He takes a spin kick from Sean, but quickly comes back and kills him. The Wassup Drop hits on BOTH DX members (to a minimal reaction), and DX bails. They can run, but they CAN’T hide, as the Dud’s go on the chase and bring them back for more ass whippin’. DX do some timely cheating to get control, and X-Pac hits the Bronco Buster on D-Von. They do a mid-eighties heat segment on D-Von, and bore the hell out of me. And just like in the 80’s, D-Von makes the tag but the ref. doesn’t see it, and DX keeps control. (I like how we had been so desensitized to wrestling by the Russo era, that even a basic formula heat segment was coming off as ‘so 80s’ before they retrained us to appreciate actual wrestling again) D-Von makes the comeback with a double clothesline, and in comes Buh Buh to clean house. Question: If this match is no holds barred, why would they need to tag in and out? The Dudley’s bring in the tables, but don’t get to use them, as Jesse jumps D-Von outside, and plants him through one with a pump-handle slam. In the ring, X-Pac tries to hit a BroncoBuster on D-Von, but Buh Buh stops it and powerbombs him through a table! Road Dogg tries to save X-Pac, but gets a DDT for his troubles, and they call for the 3D! They put Jesse through the table with it, to end this match, but the ref. is down, and didn’t see it. Tori comes in to hit Buh Buh, so he tries the superbomb through the table, but Jerry Brisco saves her, allowing X-Pac to X-factor Buh Buh off the top, through the table, for the win (because the ref. saw this one) at 10:56. Bad ending to a decent match, **. Brisco takes a 3D through a table in retaliation.

- We get a GREAT video package building to the Main Event. That did JUST what it was supposed to do, get you REALLY pumped for the match.

- WWF Title, Iron Man Match, with special referee Shawn Michaels: The Rock vs. Triple H: See, Shawn was brought in to ref. because he was the winner of the OTHER major Iron Man Match in WWF history, back at WrestleMania XII with Bret Hart. In addition, EVERYONE (myself included) doubted that Rocky and HHH could makes this work, considering this IS the Attitude era, and everything. Hunter makes his way out with the whole McMahon family, but sends them back to the locker room, saying that he wants to do it on his own. They stare eachother down for a bit to start, getting the crowd all JAKKED UP, and then they go into a couple false lock ups. Rock gets a side headlock, but Hunter powers out, and hooks an overhead wristlock, which he bends Rock backwards in. Miavia gets a few near falls, in quick succession, so Triple H bails out. He makes it back in, and hooks a side headlock, but a criss cross (including a LEAPFROG by the Rock) leads to a big right hand by the champ, and Hunter bails again. The Game seems lost, too, yelling at the crowd before getting back to the Rock. Another criss cross (including Triple H trying to use the leapfrog that worked for the Rock earlier), but Miavia saw it coming and decks him. Hunter takes control with a clothesline, and works the arm. He hits a single arm DDT for two, and keeps battering the left arm, but a missed clothesline leads to a Rock Bottom for three at 10:40! Rock: 1, Triple H: 0.

- They brawl up the isle (and not the “hair pull” brawl, but a REAL fight up the isle), which Hunter wins, and he dumps Rocky back in. Rock takes control, however, and works on the knee, including a figure four! Triple H does a great job of selling the hold, but turns it over, and now ROCK sells (!). He makes the ropes, and it spills outside again, where Rocky dominates, but Hunter gets a clothesline to comeback. HHH throws him in the crowd, where they brawl, and Hunter wins. Back in they go, and Triple H hits a big suplex, and a series of elbow drops for two. They have a Test of Strength on the mat, which Hunter gets some two’s off of. They have a slugfest, with Rocky winning, but Hunter tosses him outside, over the top. Hunter takes a shot to the steps outside, and Rocky keeps working the knee, back inside. But now what will Triple H work with? He tries another figure four but Hunter fights out, and hits the Pedigree for the pin at 25:32. Rock: 1, Triple H: 1.

- Hunter keeps control, and gets a quick inside cradle for another fall at 26:32. Rock: 1, Triple H: 2. Good spot too, showing Rocky is still hurt from the big Pedigree spot.

- Rock comes back with rights, but HHH dumps him to the outside, and whips his ass out there! They go to the entrance area, where Hunter takes a shot to the set, and then Rock tries a suplex, but Hunter turns it into one of his own, but Rocky hits a side suplex in return! He beats on the Game some more, and hits a big backdrop, as Shawn informs the commentators that he won’t count them out because it wouldn’t effect the score. They get back in, and Rock continues to pound him, but Hunter hits a facebuster, and a nice piledriver for three at 32:27. Rock: 1, Triple H: 3.

- Hunter works him over in the corner, but Rock shoots out with a clothesline, only to get a reverse elbow for HHH for a two count. He heads up top, but does the Ric Flair spot of being caught up there, as Rocky slams him off. Slugfest won by the Rock, and he gets a cradle for two. Criss cross leads to Hunter hitting a high knee, and we have another slugfest, again won by the Rock! Another criss cross ensues, and Triple H hooks on a tight Sleeper! He even puts his feet on the ropes, like a good little heel. Shawn catches him, however, and breaks the hold up, allowing Rocky to pound away and hit a big belly to belly suplex! It gets a dramatic two. And guess what? Almost forty minutes in, and the crowd is STILL hot! He gets a quick DDT to follow, getting three at 40:40. Rock: 2, Triple H: 3.

- They go outside again, where Miavia drops Hunter on the timekeeper’s table, and again whips him into the steps. He hits a swinging neckbreaker out there, and rolls Hunter back in. Hunter cowers back, but grabs a chair and blasts the Rock for a DQ at 43:45. Rock: 3, Triple H: 3.

- Hunter then easily covers him for a quick three at 44:12 (with his feet on the ropes, of course!). Smart spot, again. Showing how Hunter won’t mind losing a point, if he can get more in return. Rock: 3, Triple H: 4.

- Rock is bleeding off the chair shot (I hate Rocky’s blade job’s!), and Hunter hooks on another sleeper. The crowd is even super hot DURING A SLEEPER, showing you how much these two rule! The sleeper puts him out at 47:30. Rock: 3, Triple H: 5! Again, another great spot, showing you how smart Hunter is to put the Rock out, and it works in the context of the match because normally a wrestler could breakout, but after 47:00 minutes, he’s so tired that it works!

- Hunter won’t break, however, and gets in a shoving match with Shawn. Through all this, Rock acts hurt, but as Hunter walks over Rock BLASTS HIM with a huge right, and he whips him to the corner, allowing Hunter to take Shawn’s bump to the floor! He drags him back in, and Hunter takes control, but gets crotched on the top which allows Rocky to hit a big superplex! Who would have thought the crowd would be THIS DAMN HOT over 50:00 minutes in? The superplex gets a dramatic two, and Rocky dumps him to the floor, where he hits a slingshot to the post! He tries to whip him to the steps, with 6:00 minutes left, but Hunter reverses and Miavia takes the bump. They climb onto the broadcast table, where Hunter tries a Rock Bottom, but Rock escapes and Pedigrees him on it! Unfortunately, the table doesn’t actually break, and Hunter took the full force of the bump. Rock climbs back in, and Hunter is counted out at 56:10. Rock: 4, Triple H: 5. Hunter then shows us the RIGHT WAY to do a blade job.

- He crawls back in, where Rock hammers with hard rights, and out come the McMahons! Big DDT by the Rock, and he takes out Vince and Shane, then connects with a spinebuster slam and the People’s Elbow for three at 58:04! Rock: 5, Triple H: 5!

- DX runs out and pounds on the Rock, and that weird Judgment Day video plays on the big screen, and OUT RIDES THE UNDERTAKER (making his WWF return), who cleans house on the McMahon’s and DX (blowing the roof of the place), but chokeslams, and tombstone’s Hunter causing a DQ (with no time left), making the FINAL SCORE: Rock 5, Triple H: 6! Hunter is then carried out by the McMahon’s and DX, along with his new WWF title! That was one HELL of a match! I mean, whoa! The fact that they kept it entertaining, AND kept the crowd into it for the whole time is a testament to how over both are. **** ½. (I haven’t seen this one in ages, but I remember being really impressed with it, and I’m eager to get to this show to review it)

- Bottom Line: Now that was one hell of a show! I mean, I had three matches at **** or above, one at *** +, and NOTHING under **. What more could you ask for? In addition to an all around great card, Triple H and The Rock is something truly special, and although the first 15:00 minutes or so is a little slower, it IS NOT a boring match. People cheered this show when it went down in May, and I cheer it now, 5 months later, with good reason.

- Highly Recommended! (I haven’t seen this show since writing this review over thirteen years ago, but I’m really eager to now, as my fifteen year old self seemed to really like it. It’s coming… after I finish the WCW stuff, it’ll be over to all the WWE stuff I haven’t covered yet – with RAWs and Coliseum Videos alternating in between)

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